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Love never has and can’t be described in a sentence; not even a paragraph. There is a wide range of views about love in the story ‘What We Talk about When We Talk about Love.’ This story involves a group of couples who are discussing love. However, they seem to be confused as to what love is. Everyone has their description and definition of love since individuals usually define it grounded in their societies, education, social classes, backgrounds, and cultures. This essay mainly focuses on the different views of love, such as Mel’s impassionate view of love conflicting with his wife, Terri’s self-sacrificing views about love. Once the perspective of love is developed as per the opinion of the characters, I will analyze it against my definition of love to see whether it supports or conflicts with the characters’ views about love. I will finally assess if Carver’s characters are believable.
When it comes to Mel, he is the person with the most absurd view. He is not passionate, and one can tell that his wife Terri favored marriage with Ed over his marriage. He is Terri’s husband, and he says that he only believes in spiritual love. Mel had spent five years in a seminary in the past, and this might be the base of his views about love. There is a point where Mel state that if there were a chance for him to go back in time, he would enjoy becoming a knight to protect him from others. This shows that he, not an emotional person and rather conceals his feelings from others. It is also apparent through Terri’s behavior that Mel doesn’t have the passion to experience love.
The only love he seems to experience is the love for his children; however, that is a different sense, and even if he would comment about it, it can be said that is the view of love. The love for his children is an instinct. The children were born to his care and made with his blood and therefore never searched for their love but came to be when the children were born. His relationship with women or rather with his wife or women he came across in the past is distant and indifferent as to whom they are inside.
Mel also believes that love can continue even after one loses his first love. There is a point he states that the terrible thing although also the good thing is that if something happened to someone the following day, the other would only grief for a short time after which the surviving party would continue and love again. If a husband or wife dies, the other person would grief for a while but loves again and has someone else soon enough. Mel’s view here is that when someone dies, he or she dies with love and the one left would love another, and the dead love would be replaced.
The characters seem confused about the definition of love, and they all have different opinions. Mel’s views and his wife’s Terri conflict. It is clear that Mel is not personate and he is the person with the most absurd idea of love, but Terri is the closest to understanding what love is. One of the areas that give Terri’s view concerning love is the remarks she makes to Nick and his wife, Laura. Terri scolds them for basing their relationship on physical elements instead of passion or emotion. An excellent example of this conflict is when Terri explains about the man she lived with before Mel. She describes how the man tried to kill her as he shouted he love Terri. Terri calls this love, and when she asks the rest what they would with such love, Mel says that that is not loving and even ask his wife to stop being silly. Terri argues that people are different and this was love. This indicates the conflicting views between Mel and his wife, Terri about love.
My definition of love supports Nick’s view of love. Although he doesn’t talk much, one can see Nick’s stand about love. I believe that love is a force of nature, and no one is capable of commanding or taking it away. Love is more significant than a person, it’s like an energy that radiates. It can be inviting but it’s difficult to dictate where, when, and how love expresses itself. This is the case for Nick since he is unable to dictate it. As they are talking, Nick touches his wife a great deal, holding and kissing Laura’s hand and touching her legs under the table. Mel states “You guys have been together for eighteen months and you love each other. It shows all over you. You glow with it. But you both loved other people before you met each other.” This is why I say that I support Nick’s view of love since I don’t believe one is capable of dictating love. He shows genuine affection, and although his friends are talking about love, he doesn’t change. Nick is capable of hearing their hearts which shows that he has an insight of love that others don’t have. Nick suggests that love is absolute, and this is what my definition says. Love has no conditions, and it is free, and no one’s views can change your feelings of love towards someone. I, therefore, support Nick’s view and belief about love.
I would say that Carver’s characters are believable considering their based argument. Laura is Nick’s wife, who is 35 years old and a legal secretary, and therefore, her arguments can be believed. Mel is a cardiologist who is old enough (forty-five years) to have experience and bases his views on his experiences. The question about love came with Mel, and this means he has been thinking about it. He gives examples from real life; for instance, the example he gives about a couple who were almost killed in an accident. This is an indication that he has come across quite a lot in his life. Nick is a keen observer and married and therefore, can be credible concerning this topic. Terri also has her experiences, and she makes reasonable arguments. Terri is credible since she is the only character who is close to understanding what love is. These characters are believable. One can’t indicate what love truly is but each character has felt it in some way.
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