The Controversial Idea Of Gay Parents

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When you think of parents, what do you think? The conventional idea in today’s society is that parents should include a man and woman relationship (or more commonly known, heterosexual marriage). But what people refuse to acknowledge is that there is an observable rise in the amount of gay parents across the globe. I have presented facts and figures to prove so.

According to an article by ‘LIFELONG ADOPTIONS’; “The number of same-sex couples who have adopted children has more than tripled, from 6,500 couples in 2000 to 22,000 in 2010.” Though the source may be primarily focused on the US statistics, the facts are there and the figures are irrefutable. To paraphrase the article in the bullet point following, sexual orientation does not affect the child nor does it affect the relationships in the family as a whole. You can be gay and be a good parent to your children.

“Parent-child relationships are typically just as strong in same-sex couples as in heterosexual ones. Research published by CoramBAAF actually suggests that gay fathers show greater levels of interaction with their child than other types of parents,” says ‘Coram.’ Common misconceptions regarding gay parenting can severely damage families that have done nothing wrong. In 2017, LGBT couples were legally allowed to foster, adopt or apply for a surrogate. In many people’s opinion, this law took far too long to pass, but the relief and joy was widespread. This opened a brand new gate, however, to homophobes. It isn’t uncommon for heterosexual couples or individuals to find offense in gay couples and families, as they believe it is against the bible or just downright inhumane. I should however mention, that the lives of others are not your business, and are not yours to judge unless absolutely necessary.

Referring back to ‘LIFELONG ADOPTION’s article, they state the following; “Children of gay and lesbian parents are much more self-aware, they communicate about their feelings more openly, and show more empathy for people different from themselves.” This information can be heavily factored into the reason why gay adoption should be widespread and not selective. For example, Russia is the largest country in the world- and one of the most homophobic of them all. LGBT individuals are murdered there and more often than not the person responsible for their death will not be charged. LGBT Russians are viewed in contempt by most Russian people, and acts of discrimination are against no laws whatsoever. Even as early as 1999, Homosexuality was viewed as a mental illness.

Homosexuality should not be viewed as a mental illness, a crime or anything beneath or above. Homosexuality is a beautiful thing and should be able to flourish with those who are. In countries like Russia and India, they must consider the following; why can’t people love who they want without judgement?

On the lighter side of the tunnel, there are many options for LGBT families in terms of starting a family, the most common methods being adoption and surrogacy. According to ‘Family Formation,’ adoption is a mere fraction of the minimum total for a surrogate. Surrogacy is an expensive procedure, as the parents in question must pay a woman the necessary fee to not only carry their child, but check up on and nurture it until the delivery date. The surrogate mother can indeed change her mind and keep the baby if she wishes, however if it is a gestational surrogate, they are not biologically related to the child, and therefore has no right to change her mind. “Once legal parenthood is established, the surrogate has no legal relationship to the child—not even visitation rights,” according to an article on law.

Adoption is a lesser expensive service. The child in question must be under the age of 18 when the adoption papers are processed, and cannot have been in a civil or married partnership. Birth parents must consent to the adoption before it can be fully processed, and the total fee for adoption comes out at around £1,975 for processing the application.

As an adoptive parent, your rights are in no way limited in terms of taking care of your child.

To conclude, love is, in every sense of the word; love. Parents of all shapes, sizes, gender and appearance should be able to have the right that is parenting. Adoption, fostering and surrogacy are the early stages in what will one day be a conventional system. For now, everything presented are the mere milestones we have achieved thus far and will grow into something huge.

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