Marriage Differences in Botswana

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The introduction part discusses about the culture of Botswana, lifestyle and marriage. The body part discusses the history of life and marriage, marriage now, marriage in the book, the similarities and differences of life and marriage in the book and real life. The concluding part discusses the difference of marriage in the book, film and real life.

Life and culture of people in Botswana

Botswana, which is situated in the southernmost part of Africa, is surrounded by many other countries. Almost all parts of this country are bordered by deserts, the eastern part is covered with hilly areas and the northern side is covered with salty lakes. San is the most primitive resident of this area and thereafter came the tribe called Tswana. The majority of the people in Africa today are from this tribe. The people of this region are mainly known by the name as Botswana. The lifestyle of Africa is extremely different when compared to other countries. Being the hottest region it is difficult to cultivate crops. Africa is not a well developed country. It is by the amalgamation of Tswana and English through which the artistic life of Botswana enlightened. By the merging of these cultures there is a great change in the lifestyle among some people in Botswana. Funeral rites, birth, death etc are important events of Botswana life. Their concept of marriage is extremely different from the traditional concept.

Like any other country, the power is in the hands of men in Botswana too and women always have a secondary position and their main duty in life is to look after the children and do the house hold works. In every area men have the domination over women and it can be easily understood while going through the universities and colleges. The people in Botswana use food that includes both vegetables and meats. In the case of law, there is no difference between the genders. Every one is equal and severe punishments are given to the adolescent offenders. In the past parents were taking decisions of their children in the case of their marriage. An adolescent girl has no right to take her own decision. “Because marriage was a financial transaction between two kin groups, rather than two individuals, it could not be left up to the changing and unstable emotions of an adolescent girl.” (Powers). The parents in the past were of the stern belief that marriage is one of the inevitable parts in the life of a girl and it has its own importance, so an adolescent girl cannot take the decision of her own.

Life and Marriage in Botswana- A Historical Overview

As all over the world, social classes in Botswana were flowing without any specific borders. All the families and individuals were extended among traditional and modern forms especially between the varying traditional feudal-type and capitalist-type social ranks. The traditional model of social status included aristocrats and cattle holding headmen and very often the rich and poor were distinguished taking into consideration control over property and cattle holding. The poor aristocrats had to work hard in the mines of South Africa and a number of serfs came back from the mines with enough possessions to gain equal position among others especially the commoners. There occurred the greatest change among the families; they rose to the position of creative agriculturalists and productive agriculturalists and craft workers. Modernism came in their mind and they started to send children especially girls to school which resulted in the growth of educated people and this led Botswana to be a new republic. Gender relations can be seen along with the changing class associations and the aristocratic women often had a lot of benefits over the commoner and servile women. Traditional marriage systems prevailed among the families. But male domination was deep rooted in the society and the males were extremely against the extensive education of women. Today Botswana has women cabinet ministers and high court judges but the irony is that women are poorer than men in the present area in difference to the past. (Botswana History Pages, by Neil Parsons). In Botswana Western clothes were common amongst the people excluding the poor for long years. The traditional dress which was stitched from leather and fur were useful in winter and cold and the families live traditionally in small houses.

The concept of marriage in Botswana includes many aspects. If a couple is to marry legally they have to commemorate either traditional marriage or civil marriage. The civil rite marriage is under the rule of Roman Dutch law but the customary marriage requires ‘patio; a marriage agreement between the parents of groom and bride and this includes the exchange of gifts to the bride; body, the payment of bride wealth and bride price or labola. Social recognition was vital for marriage in Botswana and when the patlo ceremony takes place the marriage is socially accepted. “Patlo is thus the rite that couples have to undergo in order for their marriages to be regarded as lawful and as carrying the rights, duties and privileges accorded married people by Botswana society.” (Pitso, and Carmichael). Thus patlo is the vital part of the customary marriage for social recognition and the civil marriage has no social recognition as it lacks the patlo. Bogadi has to be performed for the completion of marriage in Botswana as it has a symbolic role in the creation and maintenance of the relationship between the groom and the bride. These conventional conditions were mainly the central fact between the rich and the poor.

Marriage, childbearing and sexual relations in pre-modern Botswana

Traditionally, the marriage in Botswana was often arranged by the parents or other close respected relatives and the love affairs were little considered. Often boys and girls were kept apart to avoid mutual interaction; boys were sent to the cattle posts and they have to spend their youth there and girls were kept in the house till their marriage and were under the control of mothers. Their main concern of marriage was procreation but the childbearing was firmly prohibited to unmarried people and the extramarital relations were rebuked as illegal. Generally sexual relations were regarded correct only in the married life and premarital relations and pregnancy were strictly restricted and strong punishments were imposed on a girl who had premarital relations with her boy friend. Nineteen years was the minimum age at first pregnancy for all women aged fifteen to forty nine. Marriage was a status symbol in Botswana and it had great traditional significance and those who failed to marry were often called with nicknames. Even today, unmarried persons are not allowed to join in rituals such as’ patio’ and the dead body of their children taken to the ‘patio’ for the funeral only through the back entrance.

Polygamy (having more than one wife) was allowed in Botswana and the family arranged the first marriage of a girl and it included bride-wealth or bride-service. In the past marriages were explained as a progression which consist of the appeal of marriage and introductory connections, sexual relations, children, a public festival, the organization of a family within the man’s compound, and bride-wealth. Most of the people in Botswana married through civil rights and traditionally according to the customs and lots of people had a church wedding ceremony too. In Botswana people may marry either in accordance with traditional systems or civil rights systems but in both systems the woman was underprivileged, the husband was expected to have the role to manage the belongings. There also arrived a need for divorce from the side of men and women with general reason including adultery, lack of support or household labor, and abuse from the side of other. (Culture of Botswana).

The present system of marriage in Botswana

Presently, people in Botswana do not give much consideration to the system of marriage. Now women in modern life are of the opinion that it is not by the security of men they are living and the concept that men are the main source of income is not very correct. In older days marriage was essential for every grown up individual. But in the modern era the situation has changed. Now the need for marriage has become an unimportant issue. People are not of the opinion that in a life marriage is a compulsory one, but they need children for them. So in this modern life women in Botswana give birth to children without marriage. And society is not at all bothered about this issue. Even the survey failed to give reason why the number of marriages in Botswana is lesser today but one another astonishing fact they found is that Boatswain ladies give much consideration to give birth to children without marrying. A large number of men and women are living together but they are not married. While going through the survey one can find that “about 60% of the men reported being singles whereas 25%, 14.8%, and 0.5% of them said they were married, co-habiting, or divorced, respectively. Regardless of their marital status, the majority (57%) reported staying with their partners and having only one wife or partner (83.7%).” (Bukonda, etal).

Divorce is not a common event in this country today while comparing to the past as not much marriages are taking place. In the modern generation husband is not considered as a superior one. Women don’t want to depend on their husbands for everything because there give equal consideration to both men and women. By the beginning of modern culture the relationship between fellow being seemed to be fading and as a result of the communal changes there is no uniformity in the case of family affairs and in marital affairs. Mainly the modern society in Botswana is eccentric; they are not bothered about their partners. Boatswain women have extremely changed. Even though their husbands leave their wives they are not concerned as they are so strong now and they have the confidence that they can live without their husbands’ support. There is a wide increase in the case of cohabitation in Botswana as the people are not interested to lead a family life. They just wish to have off springs for them and for that they just make sexual relations. Researchers found that a marriage can help to reduce the health hazards as there is a partner to share the other one’s problem. They are of the opinion that marriage can even provide a communal support and if there is a companion in life it is possible to reduce marital stress too. One can see a wide increase in the case of divorce in Botswana at present and the main reason is that women in the modern age do not desire to live depending on their husbands and they also wish to achieve high rank in society. And to get away from men’s power over women mostly they avoid the marriage ceremony and instead they wish to have an unmarried relationship. They feel affection towards their spouse but they are not interested to live with them as they find that it will make them lead a prison-like life. Women in this modern era believe that the period which they spend with their partners before their marriage is a better one as it is at this time they understand each other. And if they try to understand each other their married life will be a success. So to a great extent this method helps to lead a successful life but on the other side they believe that while marrying a man without knowing any thing about him will become an utter failure and it is a main reason which leads to a divorce. The one main reason why there is an early marriage in Botswana in the earlier period is to avoid childhood pregnancy and in this modern era one can view that there is a lot of increases in this as the marriage concept is far away from the modern Botswana community. As the culture and life style of Botswana has changed a lot from the past the marriage and childbearing take place so late among the women at present and a result sex before marriage became a common one among the modern Botswana’s.

Present life style in Botswana

One can see that there is a wide increase in urbanization in Botswana in this modern age. Even the most primitive wanderers now prefer the modern lifestyle. In the parish area the people still continue cattle rearing which was once a custom among the traditional people. Toward the 20th century there was progress in the field of women’s education and as a result there was a continuous presence of women in every field. In every field there is a wide improvement compared to the traditional Botswana. In every nook and corner government established health services and many government hospitals are established for the villagers. There are different systems recognized to help the disabled people by several groups and by this there is a wide development in the case of villagers in Botswana. The method of retirement fund for the old was started in modern Botswana. There is a large variety of taverns, café in this region and if any one needs to find any type of tavern and café which they like it can be seen in Botswana. In Botswana the growth rate has increased compared to the past. And the lifestyle in Botswana has a wide difference while comparing the past and present. Women got great power in society and the reason is the improvement in their education. They have the right to take their own decision and they don’t want to depend on their parents.

Cohabitation in Botswana-An issue related to marriage

In the current system, people in Botswana do not prefer a well arranged marriage system. They choose never marry policy or wished to live as single. This trend is increasing from the last three decades. Here the average age of marriages also increased during this period. In this decade more people select cohabitation, which means opposite sex people lead sexually intimate relationships without marriage. It is also known as inter alia. Now the tendency of cohabitation is increasing. According to the study of Zitha Mokomane, working in University of Botswana as a faculty of social science department, the ratio of inter alia increased from 31% in 1991 to 41% in 2001. It also says that women in the age group of 15 to 49 engaged in cohabitation have increased at present. (Mokomane).

The following table shows the percentage of males and females chose marriage and cohabitation in their life based on social and economic characteristics. ((Mokomane, 7).

There are certain reasons for increasing the cohabitation tendency in Botswana. Many researchers studied about cohabitation and its role in this country and they found out three possibilities for this kind of union. The first reason is cohabitation is viewed as another form of marriage and through this way people try to express their negative response against wedding as an institution. The second reason is cohabitation is viewed as a temporary stage before marriage. That is, it is considered as a transitional or trial period which helps to test the relationship. The third reason is cohabitation is viewed as a choice to being single. This view gives high priority for independency and low priority for commitment.

Some other reason for growing cohabitation in Botswana is cultural and structural modification which makes restrictions to marriage and diminishing of traditional morality. Bride wealth is another motivation for cohabitation, because unemployed and low income men find it difficult to pay.

Legal aspect of cohabitation

In the legal aspect of Botswana, both general and customary law does not give any support for cohabitation. Through the lack of legal support this country tries to encourage marriage life system. It does not consider cohabiting women and children born in the cohabiting relation for the inheritance and property right as in the marriage. According to law the cohabiting woman does not have any inherent intestate succession if her partner expires without leaving a will. Another fact is, according to Workmen Compensating Act in Botswana the dependent of the workman who is deceased has the right to claim compensation, but this law does not allow cohabiting women for acquiring the compensation. Law considers children of the cohabiting couple as non-marital. They are considered the same as unmarried mother’s children so the law permits to get all considerations that are allowed to unmarried women’s children.

From the above mentioned points it is clear that as per the law in Botswana, marriage is the only one authorized way to get right to use resources accrued by the man, for the women and her children.

Social issues of cohabitation

Currently cohabitation is a general phenomenon In Botswana, but it causes some social issues. In this relation the cohabitants are not well educated, they are hesitant to engage in religious activities, and most of them are unemployed. They usually prefer urban areas for leading their life than married people. Another important social issue is AIDS. According to the report from the website of AVERT, 300,000 HIV effected people lived in Botswana in 2007 and this country is the second highest in adult HIV prevalence (HIV & AIDS in Botswana).

Cohabitation is one of the major reasons for the increasing rate of HIV here. From the above mentioned points it is crystal clear that loss of morality, ethics, and the increased number of unemployed and uneducated people and the spreading of AIDS are the major social issues raised due to cohabitation in Botswana.

Disadvantages of cohabitation

Cohabitation has many disadvantages. Most important drawbacks of cohabitation are lack of security and lack of legal protection. If anyone – either man or woman – dies, then others like parents and other relatives of the deceased person can possess all the wealth of this person. In marriage if husband misuses or ill-treats wife, she has the right for getting legal protection, but in the same situation cohabitant woman does not get any legal protection. Another disadvantage is cohabitants do not get respectability and social acceptance from society. In cohabitation life, if problems occur between the man and the woman in most of the situations they cant solve it in a good manner, because they may not get support from their family for solving issues. So stability in cohabitation is less compared to marriage life.

Elements of Marriage in the book ‘Number One Ladies Detective agency’, by Alexander McCall Smith

The book ‘Number One Ladies Detective Agency’, challenges the traditional forms of marriage and relations in Botswana culture and other wide problems of life in an African Country. The protagonist in this novel Mma Ramstswe suffers greatly by the death of her father, but without losing courage she faces the world with great bravery. She decides to open a ladies detective agency in Botswana with her father’s money ignoring society’s bad interpretations. She avoids such comments with strong replies “Women are the ones who know what’s going on. They are the ones with eyes”. This shows the strong built minds of women in Botswana and their bravery to face any problem which occurs in their life. She is a woman who has a strong mind and keen knowledge of the human mind and heart, a dedicated intellect of right and wrong and a personality which inspires trust and confidence which makes her a charming character. For instance, her comments to the first client who suffers from a fraud father “many men are like that” indicates her keen knowledge of humans minds as she is a victim. Indeed she is a traditionally built woman with traditional values and she differs from other detectives as she has great concern for the people in Africa. She investigates a series of crimes in the Botswana capital of Gaborone which include child abduction, fraud, and infidelity.

Mma Ramotswe, with her independence tries to change her culture and she uses the strong points and guts to instill a modern point of view on a culture where female reliance is entrenched in its history. And also she does not want her people to be characterless and self- interested people who forget the traditional values of Africa. Mma Ramotswe had a deep knowledge about the traditional attitudes towards women, marriage and family duty from her traditional background and is just opposite to those attitudes. In the beginning she accepted the marriage proposal of Mr. J.L.B Matekoni, owner of Tlokweng Road Speedy Motors but it ended in failure. She departs him as he had a rude behavior towards her and she could not tolerate his nature. This indicates her independent nature to take decisions for her own and choose a life she likes. Traditional women tolerate abuses to a certain extent but now women are courageous enough to leave their husbands who abuse them and this view is presented in this book through Mma Ramotswe. Her next selection of a companion namely Notes Makoti is also a failure as he is physically rude who often ridicule and beats her which results in the loss of her unborn child. She leaves her second companion too without any regret as she does not want to waste her life with a rude man. These preferences and separations are common among the people in the country as they have no desire to waste their life simply living with a cruel minded man adjusting his behavior and it is clearly illustrated in the novel. (Lampert, and Oglethorpe). The case of Grace Makutsi is different as she interestingly prepares for the marriage with her beloved which is in contrast with Mma Ramotswe’s view of marriage and partner. Above all this shows the attitude of people especially women towards marriage and family life in difference to the traditional marriage system. Here Mma Ramotswe is the living symbol of women in Botswana who fought for the social equality for women in all levels. Mma Ramotswe tries her best to be equal with men in every stage especially in marriage and business. She prefers a profession of her own without considering the social prejudice and companions of her choice. She wants freedom, happiness and peace of mind in life, marriage and profession. These are the characteristics of women in Botswana who want social equality and equal justice in the nation. Though the novel taught the reader living a moral life is the best way to be free truly but the genuine obscurity the novelist is actually concerned is the search for happiness.

The similarities of life style and marriage in the book and real life

The life style and marriage in the book ’The Number 1 Ladies Detective Agency’ are greatly similar with the real life also. In the book Mma Ramstawe, the protagonist tries to be equal with men in every part especially in her marriage and profession. She questions the male dominated society through her marriage with two persons and the immediate divorce as she hates to live under the control of men. She likes to live independently not in the shadow of men, suffering his abuses so she leaves them without any regret. Women in Botswana possess all these characteristic features; they prefer a self-governing life and do not want to waste their time living with a bad-mannered man adjusting his ill-treatments. They also hate the traditional system of marriage that is the marriage arranged by parents and they select their companions according to their wish. In the book Mma Ramstawe selects her better halves with her own interest and also leaves them without any disappointment. Indeed, Mma Ramstawe has a keen knowledge about human mind and heart; as she lived with two men and works among people of different characteristics, a strong and courageous mind to face any problem as she opens a ladies detective agency ignoring the society’s awful comments. This is similar in the case of the women in Botswana, they prefer alternation so as to get keen knowledge about the nature of human and also brave to face any obstacle as they are highly educated and have a courageous mind. Thus Mma Ramstawe is a living symbol of every Botswana woman who prefers a self-determining life.

The Differences between Life Style and Marriage in the Book and in Real Life

In the book entitled ‘Number One Ladies Detective agency’, by Alexander McCall Smith he discusses about the wide problems that occur around the African country especially about the lifestyle and marriage problems which the Botswana society faces. The writer in this book gives a detailed description about what cruel deeds were a lady wants to suffer in her marital life. Even though it is a story there is no much difference in actual life too but in the novel the lady characters like Ramstswe, Mma Ramotswe are interested in the system of marriage. Even though her first marital relationship became an utter failure, Mma Ramotsmwe once again decided to marry. And when it also shattered she decided to challenge against the male community. But in real life women are fully bothered about the ill treatment of males towards the women and they are always cautious towards that situation and if once their marriage became a failure they will not take a risk again. There are so many crucial problems faced by the women folk in Botswana but they are not referred in the book as well as in the film. Women in the real life do not give much consideration to marriage and even if they decided to marry it is only because they were interested in child bearing. So the problems of real life were not much elaborated in the book and film and when one goes through this two one will get a small picture about this society.

Life and marriage in Botswana as portrayed in the movie ‘The No.1 Ladies’ Detective agency’

The movie which has the same name of the novel was directed by academy award winner Anthony Minghella. The movie which was shown as a series in HBO was shot in some locations in Botswana. Thus the viewers got an opportunity to watch the life and culture of the people in their own setting. One of the most notable and much praised features of the movie was the acting performance of Jill Scott who played the part of Precious Ramotswe with effortlessly depicting intelligence and generosity of the character. The character portrayal symbolizes the quality of innocence people of Botswana posses, the quality which the protagonist wishes to triumph in her country. The beautiful setting and heart throbbing wild scenes make the movie really enjoyable and creates in the viewer a feeling of love and passion for the exquisiteness of the country.

An analysis of the movie points to the fact that it obviously makes sincere efforts to stay away from the usual depiction of Africa as a poor continent full of suffering people. Instead the natural harmony and enthusiasm that people in such a culture posses is artistically delineated in the movie. On the other hand, some critics are of the opinion that the grave problems of people are ignored in both the book and the movie, but there are references to HIV/AIDS and other difficulties though they are not the central themes. The values and traditions of the people of Botswana and the effects of modernity on their social life are interwoven with the themes handled by the movie. While speaking about his experience of filming ‘The No.1 Ladies’ Detective agency’, director Minghella maintains, “Particularly fascinating to me was working and filming in an African country where old and new are currently coexisting, where traditional values have not yet been eroded by the demands and efficiencies and neuroses of the modern.” (Littleton).

The cases handled by Mma Ramotswe range from trivial things, such as, cheating husbands to more complex subjects like kidnapping. There are themes that revolve round marriage infidelity and other issues related to marriage, such as, domestic violence etc. The harsh realities present in the system of African society and culture are explained in the movie. The themes such as marriage and the complexity of relationships between man and woman become important parts of the unfolding incidents. In the movie Ramotswe tries to solve the marital problems of her clients. Her own conflicts in the previous marriages where she suffered a battering relationship and abuses arise during the process and she struggles to cope with them.

Conclusion

The institution of marriage which has been held as one among the central themes of social life of man for many centuries is witnessing dramatic changes with the advent of modern materialistic outlook and fast paced lifestyle. The concept itself is changing and many aberrations in its form are present in the cultural life of human beings. This paper, being an analysis of the above mentioned changes, could make an attempt to elucidate marriage differences in an African country named Botswana. The book titled ‘No. 1 Ladies’ Detective Agency’ written by Alexander McCall Smith presents a good picture of life in Botswana and provides occasional references of marriage and related issues in that country. The sequel of the book in the form of film adaptation also delineates life and marriage in the African country. An analysis of the elements of the social institution named marriage in the book and in the movie of the same name and an attempt to compare and contrast them with real life in Botswana will shed light on the extent to which the description about African life and system of marriage by Smith remains truthful.

Hence it can be concluded that the quest of Mma Precious Ramotswe as portrayed in the book and the movie reveals the life and culture of people of Botswana as well as their concept of marriage though some degree of disparities is present in the narration against the real-life situations.

References

Botswana History Pages, by Neil Parsons: 13: Society. 1999. Web.
Bukonda, N K., etal. Men’s Martial Status and Involvement in the Prevention of Mother- to- Child Transmission of HIV/AIDS in Botswana. NLM Gateway: A Service of the U.S National Institute of Health. 2002.
Culture of Botswana. 2007. Web.
HIV & AIDS in Botswana. Avert is an International AIDS Charity. 2009. Web.
Lampert, Nicola., and Oglethorpe, Tim. Howa U.S Soul Singer Become Africa’s no.1 Lady Detective with a Little help from a Padded Behind. Femail. 2008. Web.
Littleton, Cynthia. HBO nabs ‘Ladies’ Detective Agency’: Scot Rose set for Weinstein, BBC Adaptation. Variety.com. 2008.
Mokomane, Zitha. Cohabitation in Botswana: An Alternative or a Prelude to Marriage. 2009.
Mokomane, Zitha. Cohabitation in Botswana: An Alternative or a Prelude to Marriage: Results: Socio- Economic Characteristics of Cohabitants in Botswana. 2009. Web.
Powers, Jessica. African Marriage: An Alliance between Kin Groups. Suite 101. 2003.
Pitso, Joseph M.N., and Carmichael, Gordon, A. Premarital Childbearing in Thamaga Village, Botswana. Journal of Population Research. BNET: The go to Place for Management. 2003.

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