Intimacy, Love and Friendship and how they translate to employability

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Table of Contents

Introduction
Use of conventions in love as marketing strategies
Emotions in intimacy and how they translate to employability
The branded self as a concept in intimacy and employability
Intimacy in the modern society
Ability to handle crises
Conclusion
Reference List

Introduction

Skills such as problem solving and handling of crises are vital for a person working for any organization. This is because problems and crises in life are bound to occur in the course of one’s duty. Problem solving and crises handling skills are developed as one encounters different situations in their private lives that demand the use of such skills. One area that helps develop such skills is the area of intimacy.

A person is able to deal with issues that may arise from time to time in their relationship with the spouse. Intimacy skills related to the conventions of love have also been employed in marketing. Emotions depicted in intimacy and the ‘branded self’ can also translate to employability. This paper shall address these and other skills in intimacy and how they translate to employability.

Use of conventions in love as marketing strategies

Gregg (2011) gives an illustration of how skills in intimacy can translate to employability. She uses an illustration of a bank’s marketing strategy in Australia. Key words such as love, intimacy and marketing are used to show how closely the bank uses the conventions of love to put across the intended message to the public.

The marketing campaign started on Valentine’s Day of 2011, when National Australia Bank (NAB) sent a rival bank a gift which carried a message that they (NAB) did not want any further business association with the Bank. NAB cited the reason for taking such a step as being unhappy in the relationship they had with the bank and they had therefore decided to ‘dump’ their rival in order to move on with their business happily.

The bank used the language used by lovers in a relationship to express their emotions to one another. Emotions of dissatisfaction and the eventual breaking up of two people, who were once in an intimate relationship, are expressed in the same manner NAB used to pass their dissatisfaction with their arch rival bank.

To further mimic a real break up between lovers, NAB hired people to act like couples who broke up because of issues such as hidden bank fees and who felt that they could no longer continue being trapped in a relationship that was oppressive to them. The acting happened in cafes and commuter trains.

NAB’s campaign strategy, of using the language on love and intimacy, was very successful and in a short period of time. It only took the bank less than a month to start seeing the positive results that the campaign had yielded. There was a significant growth in the transaction accounts. Inquiries of various bank services such as mortgages and credit cars also rose to over twice the previous rate.

Return to some old but vital concepts such as love and intimacy in for the realization of productivity for everyone. The use of love and its conventions in the NAB campaigns is an illustration of how love as a concept can be used to translate to employability. To lure people ‘breaking-up’ from ‘unhappy relationships’ with other banks, NAB wavered the ‘exit costs’ for their customers.

Emotions in intimacy and how they translate to employability

Illouz (2007) defines emotion as an inner energy that drives one to do something. It is also what defines the mood of a person and what a person is likely to do or not to do. The emotions that one exhibits in a given context are partly determined by the relationship between the parties involved.

For example, a rebuke from a boss at work would make one exhibit a different emotion from that which the person would exhibit if the rebuke came from a close friend.

This suggests that although emotions are known to be part of the psychological make up of an individual, they are also part of the cultural and social make up of an individual. This can be explained by the fact that the emotion that a person depicts in a certain context is directly related to cultural and social relationship between the two people.

Although emotions are internalized and can only be known to the other person once they are expressed, they have a lot of cultural and social connotations (Illouz, 2007). It has been identified that most of the social arrangements that are present within a society have been established based on emotional make up of individuals. For example, men are required to be courageous and show rationality when doing things.

Women, on the other hand, are expected to be cheerful, compassionate and kind-hearted. These divisions lead to the development of hierarchies in emotions. For example, due to the courageous and rational nature that men are expected to exhibit in a love relationship and in other relationships, they are deemed fit for certain positions in the world of work.

The family is also seen as the source of motivation or discouragement for many people in their workplace. Emotional baggage from relationships at home, especially intimate ones such as between a husband and the wife, may lead to one being unproductive in the workplace.

For managers in a work place, Illouz (2007) suggests that emotions of care and showing attention towards the workers contribute significantly to the increase in their productivity. Managers are also required to listen to the workers grievances and be able to deal with the different emotional complexities which arise from having different kinds of people in the organization.

The branded self as a concept in intimacy and employability

The branded self is seen as a commodity which must strive to attract willing buyers in the labor market (Hearn, 2008). For this to happen, the branded self must package itself in a worthy manner and develop a promotional message for itself. The final product of the ‘branded self’ advertised for ‘public consumption’ should mirror a self that is competitive with the rest in the labor market.

Self promotion is therefore, not a new concept because it has been existent since time immemorial. Personal branding entails being in charge of the happenings that impact on other people’s perceptions of you and using the happenings to assist a person in the realization of the set goals.

Hearn (2008) suggests that steps of personal branding are particularly applicable in the context of a relationship between a husband and a wife. An illustration is given of Will, a man who used the concept of personal branding to improve his marriage. By trying to meet the desires of his target audience, in this case his wife, Will applied personal branding in his marriage and positive results were realized.

He viewed his wife as the first and most important customer in his organization. He therefore strived to make her fully satisfied with the product. An example of how personal branding, as a skill in intimacy, can lead to employability can be seen in the people who are hired to do advertisements of certain products or to act in television programs.

Intimacy in the modern society

Giddens (1992) explores the concept of sexuality and how it is connected with the changes that affect a person in their lives generally. In addressing this issue, the existing interpretations of the roles of sexuality in today’s culture are explored.

Giddens views sexuality as a creation of the modern day events which shape the definition of many other things, not only sexuality. Intimacy, in the modern world has been transformed and terms such as oppression and emancipation are used whenever one is speaking about it.

According to Butler (2002), the social order which exists today is such that women are striving to achieve a status equal to that of men. Women are involved in campaigns which are geared towards achievement of ‘pure relationships’. These kinds of relationships are those whereby there is equality in both emotional and sexual fulfillment for both parties involved.

The pure relationship, that some of the women are campaigning for, lead to the emergence of plastic sexuality. According to Dossie and Catherine (1997) and Kath (1991), this means a sexuality devoid of its innate relation too reproduction because the ‘pure relationship’ is not limited to the confines of heterosexual relationship, but is also applicable to other forms of alternative relationships such as lesbianism.

Rosa (1994) says that this need for women to be independent even in the area of relationships is what has led to the emergence of a cohort of women who engage in lesbianism and are in different careers so that they are not dependent on men.

David (2003) sheds light on the emergence of a new concept, known as ‘intimacy’, in the twentieth century. The concept, as used in the context of a marriage setting does not fully replace the previous dominant one known as ‘romance’ but both romance and intimacy are viewed as two concepts which coexist in a marriage. They are seen as having replaced the initial property distribution control purpose of the marriage.

The contemporary marriages have are characterized by a shift to intimacy and romance as the key factors. He sees this as a crisis in the meaning that used to exist previously in marriage and also inn the experiences of a person in marriage. The focus of marriage on intimacy impacts on one’s employability.

Instead of focusing on issues such as haw to acquire property and gain control over it like in the past, people are now redirecting their energies towards intimacy and romance in marriages and this hinders their employability or for those who are employed, their progress in employment.

Ability to handle crises

According to Cox (2005), skills in intimacy can be acquired in a family setting, and especially in the interaction between a husband and his wife. One of these skills is the ability to handle crises that the couple may face as they move on with life. A crisis can be defined as anything that people face that alters or interferes with a person’s normal lifestyle. A crisis may be positive or negative in nature.

An example of a negative crisis is the death of a loved one whereas an example of a positive crisis is the birth of a child. One major characteristic of a strong and stable family is being able to cope with hardships and crises in a manner that will make the family bond stronger instead of breaking it. A strong family has been viewed as one that is able to handle crises.

Cox (2005) observes that although some families are able to manage crises effectively, others fail to do so. Such families are often troubles and face a lot of unresolved issues. There are some characteristics necessary in families which help the couple to develop skills in intimacy and solve any crises which may arise. Some of them include commitment, appreciation and good communication skills.

A strong value system and stress management skills are also useful. These same skills are also very vital in a workplace setting. Therefore, for somebody who has developed crises management skills in intimacy, it becomes very easy for them to be hired and use the same skills in the position they are supposed to serve in.

In such a case, intimacy skills translates to employability because the employer is likely to hire a person with such skills as opposed to one who lacks such important skills.

Conclusion

Different skills in intimacy can translate to employability, as discussed in the paper. Some of the skills gained in the area of intimacy can be used as marketing strategies in order to increase profit margins of an organization. Skills in intimacy gained through different means such as in the family setting are also useful in good interpersonal relationships in the workplace.

For example, managers who are able to show care to their subjects encourage them to be more productive. Such managers are easily hired by an organization because of such emotions that they are able to exhibit while dealing with the people. The emotion of care is considered a skill in intimacy.

Reference List

Butler, J., 2002. Is Kinship Always Already Heterosexual? Differences, 13.

Cox, F., 2005. Human intimacy: marriage, the family, and its meaning. California: Wadsworth Publishing.

David, S., 2003. Modern Love: Romance, Intimacy, and the Marriage Crisis. New York: University Press.

Dossie, E., and Catherine, L., 1997. The Ethical Slut: A Guide to Infinite Sexual Possibilities. San Francisco: Greenery Press.

Giddens, A., 1992. The Transformation of Intimacy: Sexuality, Love and Eroticism in Modern Societies. Cambridge: Polity Press.

Gregg, M., 2011. The Break-Up: Hardt and Negri’s Politics of Love in Jack Z. Bratich (ed). Journal of Communication Inquiry Special Issue on Autonomism and Communication, forthcoming October 2011.

Hearn, A., 2008. Variations on the Branded Self: Theme, Invention, Improvisation and Inventory. in The Media and Social Theory. David Hesmondhalgh and Jason Toynbee (eds). London: Routledge, 194-210.

Illouz, E., 2007. The Rise of Homo Sentimentalis, in Cold Intimacies: The Making of Emotional Capitalism. London: Polity Press. 1-39.

Kath, W., 1991. Families We Choose: Lesbians, Gays, Kinship. New York: Columbia University Press.

Rosa, B., 1994. Anti-Monogamy. A Radical challenge to Compulsory Heterosexuality? 106-120.

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