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Today many young adults continue living with their parents, even in their 20s and 30s. The main reason for this phenomenon is usually financial matters. As housing grows in price, young people find it difficult to afford their own place to live. Staying with their parents allows these children to focus on aspects other than rent and mortgage payment. Furthermore, in many cases, food is provided by the parents along with shelter. Therefore, children can concentrate on their own needs.
On the other hand, such a level of support might be detrimental to the young person’s career and overall ambitions. According to Lebowitz (2017), adult children still living at their parents’ homes often avoid getting a higher education and a stable job, which leads to their alienation from society. Lebowitz (2017) also adds that such individuals are “often perceived as overly pampered and lazy, and their parents are commonly ridiculed for being too indulgent” (p. 89). The longer an adult child stays at home, the more difficult it will be for them to start making a living independently. As Burn and Szoeke (2016) state, continued co-residing also increases the financial load and is more emotionally stressful for the parents in the long run.
While financial issues play a crucial role in this phenomenon, other factors also contribute to it. According to Burn and Szoeke (2016), children stay at home until they are in their 30’s for a variety of reasons, including emotional ones. When the time comes to leave home, young people are petrified of the idea of living on their own and not having the same level of everyday care and support that they are used to.
As for the parents, they, too, are often hesitant about letting their beloved child into adult life. At some point, they might find it difficult to discuss the situation with children. As said in the Bible, “ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord” (Ephesians 6:4, King James Version). Following this advice, parents might prefer to leave the situation as it is, instead of bringing up the issues and causing a confrontation. In the end, both young adults and their parents experience a negative impact on their lives. It takes longer for the former to acquire financial stability and reach the level of personal security that would allow them to care for the latter, once they are old.
The current situation with young adults and adolescents refusing to gain independence and become self-sufficient appears to stem from the increased range of support and overprotectiveness that their parents exert. Therefore, it is desirable that parents should consider introducing their children to the idea of autonomy carefully at a fairly young age. Thus, young people will be able to accept new responsibilities and a greater range of roles without fearing being deprived of their source of support. As soon as children, adolescents, and young adults recognize the fact that they have the agency to navigate their own life, they will be able to gain independence. Thus, the issue of anxiety experienced by young adults and adolescents when having to address issues associated with decision-making will be managed productively.
References
Burn, K., & Szoeke, C. (2016). Boomerang families and failure-to-launch: Commentary on adult children living at home. Maturitas, 83, 9-12. Web.
Lebowitz, E.R. (2017). “Failure to launch”: Shaping intervention for highly dependent adult children. Journal of the American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry, 55(2), 89–90.
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