Clinical Analysis: Conflicted Couple

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Table of Contents

Introduction
Identification of the key areas
Personalities
Action plan
Conclusion
Reference List

Introduction

This paper is aimed at discussing the problems encountered by a conflicted couple. In particular, it is necessary to focus on the experiences of Walter and Pam. This analysis will include three sections. At first, one should identify the strengths and weaknesses of their relations. Secondly, much attention should be paid to the personalities of both partners, especially the way in which their character traits affect their interactions.

Finally, it is critical to develop a strategy for supporting this couple. Overall, the methods, which can help these people, should reduce the impact of differences in their character traits; moreover, they should improve the conflict resolution techniques of this couple. Much attention should be paid to empathetic listening and the use of the Bible because these approaches can make Walter and Pam more resilient to various stressors.

Identification of the key areas

One should first note that background of these people does not throw much light on the nature of their problems. For instance, both of them come from Protestant families with many children. Additionally, these belong to the same age group.

Certainly, there are some differences in the income level. Walter earns twice as much as Pam. This is one of the issues that may contribute to the inequality of partners, and this risk should not be overlooked. Nevertheless, this issue is not one of the top concerns for this couple.

It is possible to identify several strengths in the relationship between Walter and Pam. One of the main positive aspects is the high level of commitment to the marriage. Both partners believe that this marriage will be their last one, and they want to preserve these relations. Moreover, they are ready to take steps in order to improve them. Thus, it is possible to say that both partners may be willing to accept the suggestions of a counselor.

Moreover, they will be ready to change some aspects of their behavior in order to address potential problems. Furthermore, Walter and Pam are not afraid of expressing their feelings to each other. Moreover, they can do even at the time, when they have some significant disagreements.

Both of them describe each other as good listeners and this skill is critical for conflict resolution (Darling & Cassidy, 2014, p. 251). These partners have an opportunity to identify possible emotional problems on time. Moreover, while communicating with one another, these people can pay full attention to each other’s concerns.

One should also mention that these partners involve each other in decision-making and setting new goals. Moreover, they accept the idea that each of them can assume new roles and responsibility if it is necessary.

These attitudes can be regarded as one of the strengths because partners, who are not affected by gender stereotypes, are better able to resolve conflicts (Payne, 2010, p. 129). Such partners are usually more flexible, and this quality is important for addressing potential disagreements.

Moreover, it is important to mention that both partners do not have any significant disputes regarding the management of financial resources. Nevertheless, Map and Pam are both concerned about their future economic security. This issue can be particularly relevant to people who are aged above 50. The problem is that they become more sensitive even to minor conflicts.

Apart from that, one should mention that both partners take interests in the same recreational activities. This shared interest can be viewed as a common value which can be useful for the restoration of their relations. Both parents also enjoy spending time with each others’ relatives or friends.

One should also keep in mind that both partners have similar spiritual beliefs and this similarity may be important for the recovery of their relations. It should be noted that religion involves a set of values, attitudes, and worldviews (Bubenzer, D., West, 1993, p. 13). By emphasizing these shared elements, a counselor can strengthen the cohesion of these couples.

Finally, it is important to mention that both Walter and Pam are ready to support one another as they grow older. They admit that the quality of their lives can be impaired because aging. However, this awareness of possible challenges can be important for the resilience of both partners in the future.

Moreover, a similar perception of health issues is one of the factors that can mitigate the problems related to their sexual lives. This is why these common attributes can be viewed as one of the strengths.

Nevertheless, there are some important weaknesses that should be considered. First of all, both partners want each other to become more open; this issue is particularly relevant if one speaks about the expression of feelings. This is one of the issues that should be considered by a counselor because this lack of communication and unwillingness to discuss disagreements can impair their ability to cope with emotional challenges.

Furthermore, it is important to mention that both partners tend to have disputes over many unimportant issues. Moreover, these disputes often involve mutual accusations, rather than conflict resolution. This is one of the main problems that should be identified, because accusations and the feeling of guilt can make people less satisfied with their marriage. Moreover, it is rather difficult for them to overcome the effects of disputes.

Moreover, one should bear in mind that Pam accuses Walter of taking excessive control over her life. Therefore, it is vital to understand how this control manifests itself. It is important to remember the lack of empowerment make a person feel less self-sufficient.

It is also critical to pay much attention to the sexual life of this couple. Both partners are not satisfied with their sexual life. In particular, Walter and Sam believe that each of them lacks affection. This is one of the details that can be identified.

In this case, the only positive aspect is that both partners can discuss these problems openly. This is one of the central areas that should be addressed because sexual dissatisfaction is one of the reasons why many spouses choose to end their relations. In turn, it is necessary to find way of changing their attitudes to this problem.

Personalities

To some degree, the character traits of Walter and Pam are important for describing the problems that these partners experience. This analysis can be based on the results of the SCOPE (Social, Change, Organized, Pleasing, Emotional Steadiness) test. These data can be used for explaining the behavior of partners and some typical responses to external and internal stressors.

It should be noted that Walter is an introvert who often prefers to be alone. Such people do not always prefer to share their experiences with others. In contrast, Pam is an extrovert who prefers openness and social interactions. Moreover, such individuals can easily establish relations with other people.

The main issue is that people like Pam can perceive introverts as very reclusive or detached individuals (Goldenberg & Goldenberg, 1998). This is one of the reasons why she may believe that Walter is unwilling to share his experiences with her.

As a rule, this perceived detachment can produce negative on her emotional experiences. Thus, this difference can contribute to conflicts among couples. This is one of the issues that can be singled out.

Additionally, it is critical to consider Pam and Walter have different perceptions of change. In particular, Walter is less open to new ideas or experiences, in contrast, Pam readily accepts them. In some cases, such difference can lead to some disagreements. Nevertheless, this difference can be a positive force.

In many cases, people like Walter can be strongly attracted to women like Pam because they value their free thinking and openness. By focusing on this aspect, a counselor can revitalize their relations. In particular, it is necessary to demonstrate that such differences do not necessarily lead to a conflict between spouses. This is one of the messages that a counselor should convey.

Furthermore, both Pam and Sam can be described as dependent and flexible people. Therefore, such individuals are less like to accuse one another of irresponsibility. Moreover, such people usually value consistency and goal-oriented behavior. The main advantage is that these qualities enable people to meet the expectations of one another.

This similarity can be viewed as one of the forces that can mitigate the impact of their conflicts. Nevertheless, Pam should take into account that high degree of organization can be confused with perfectionism. It can adversely affect a person who is more vulnerable to stress (Seaward, 2011, p. 46). This is one of the pitfalls that should be avoided.

Apart from that, one should speak about the tendency to be pleasing. This characteristic is related primarily such aspects as conflict avoidance and cooperation which profoundly affect the relationship between couples. Walter is more willing to express his concerns, disagreements, or dissatisfaction. Such individuals want to be assertive. The problem is that these people can be described as extremely authoritative.

Moreover, other people cannot easily adjust to such behavior. Thus, the impact of this factor should not be disregarded by the couple. In contrast, Pam scores average on this scale. Such individuals do not usually enter into conflicts with other people. This is one of the reasons why they tend to avoid discussing controversial issues or questions.

Such people do not understand why some people can become irritated at some minor details. Admittedly, they do not always want to turn a blind eye to a problem or a dispute. As a rule, they eventually express their opinions on the most urgent problems; moreover, occasionally they can also express disagreements about minor issues. This is one of the details that Pam should take into consideration.

Finally, one should speak about such a quality as emotional steadiness. Walter can be described as a person who can be easily upset. As a rule, such people are less resilient to stress. They can pay close attention to the details that appear to be unimportant to other people. Additionally, such people can react more emotionally to conflicts or disagreements, even if these disagreements do not merit much attention.

This is why it is difficult for him to overcome past disappointments. In turn, Pam may believe that she can be mistreated for no virtually reason. Furthermore, this character trait can make Walter more susceptible to sexual problems.

These are some of the main problems that can be identified and a therapist should find a way of addressing these problems. To some degree, it is necessary to find a method of changing his perception of potential disagreements. This is one of the tasks that should be accomplished.

On the whole, the discussion of the SCOPE results indicates that some character traits of Walter and Pam differ significantly. In some cases, these differences can be transformed into one of the possible strengths. For instance, one can speak about their attitudes towards change.

Moreover, there are some important similarities that should be taken into account. For instance, both Pam and Walter can be described as very organized individuals. Nevertheless, it is important to find ways of reconciling differences, related to stress management and openness. Yet, there are techniques which can be adopted to minimize the impact of these distinctions.

Action plan

It is possible to apply different strategies that can assist this couple. One of the techniques that can be applied is active listening. In order to apply this method, a counselor should provide feedback while listening to the couple. In particular, he/she can do it by restating or rephrasing their words. In this way, one can make sure that the opinions of both partners are not misinterpreted.

This is one of the precautions that should be taken. Overall, this approach can be successfully adopted if a counselor is willing to place oneself in the position of the couple. It is critical to consider such issues as their age, religious background, and their major concerns.

Under such circumstances, a counselor should become impartial and avoid taking sides with one of the partners. This method is beneficial because it enables a therapist to gain the trust of this couple (Furman, 2010). Furthermore, this approach will enable Pam and Walter to discuss their interpersonal conflicts from different perspectives (Furman, 2010).

In this case, the main task of a counselor is to highlight the importance of openness. In particular, they should bear in mind that lack of intimate relations of openness is a great concern for both of them. Apart from that, Pam and Walter should pay attention to the importance of empathetic listening.

For instance, they should learn to consider the viewpoints of one another, since this approach is important for conflict resolution; moreover, this method enables people to avoid mutual accusations that significantly impair their relations (Hawkins, 1991). Overall, such sessions can be held once a week.

They will be held during four weeks and this number of meetings will be sufficient for developing the coping skills of Pam and Walter. In the long term, these people will strengthen their family. This is one of the main goals that should be attained.

Additionally, in this case, a counselor can rely on the Biblical values while trying to assist Walter and Sam. This approach is particularly beneficial because both partners accept the importance of religion in their lives (Gibson, 2008). For instance, a therapist can lay stress on forgiveness as one of the main priorities for the partners.

These people should keep in mind that this quality can help them overcome a great number of minor conflicts that significantly impair the quality of their marital relations. It is possible to refer to several Biblical passages emphasizing the importance of forgiveness. For instance, one can mention Parable of the Prodigal Son which throws light on two important aspects.

In particular, one should speak about the willingness to recognize ones errors and the ability of a person to ask for forgiveness. Additionally, this parable show how a person should respond to the short-comings of other people. So, this Biblical passage can be rather helpful.

By focusing on such a virtue as forgiveness, a therapist will be able to minimize the impact of various disagreements that this couple struggles with. This is one of the details that can be distinguished.

Moreover, it is important to consider such an aspect as humility which is critical for the restoration of this marriage. In this context, this Biblical value can be described as the acceptance of changes that take place in the life of a person, even if these changes are not welcomed by a person. Again, one can also refer to some parts of the Bible. For instance, one can refer to the Book of Job.

This value can be important for the partners’ satisfaction with their marriage. This argument is particularly if one speaks about the problems related to sex.

Walter and Sam should take into account that these problems can be partly explained by their age, rather than lack of affection. Therefore, these people should not blame one another for these problems. It should be noted that the feeling of guilt is one of the factors that impairs their emotional well-being.

This emphasis on Biblical values requires the use of local resources, especially the cooperation with a local church. As it has been said before, Walter and Sam report that they rely on their faith at the time when they pass through a period of crisis.

Overall, the participation of in the religious life of the community can benefit this couple. This particular method can change the partners’ perceptions of the problems that they encounter. They will not perceive them as a threat to their emotional well-being. These are the main rationales for the use of this technique for the needs of these people.

The strategies identified in this section can assist this couple. They can reduce the impact of differences in character traits. More importantly, this approach can be used to minimize the perceived impact of their disagreements which do not merit much attention in many cases. These are the main benefits of this approach.

Conclusion

On the whole, this discussion indicates that a conflict within a family can be attributed to many factors. Much attention should be paid to the character traits of the partners and their perceptions of one another. The interventions which have been recommended lay stress on empathy and openness since in this way, Pam and Walter can better withstand stressors and conflicts.

In turn, the use of Bible is particularly suitable for the needs of these couple because these people can derive consolation and moral guidance from many Biblical passages. This technique can improve significantly improve the experiences of both Pam and Walter. These are the main arguments that can be put forward.

Reference List

Bubenzer, D., West, J. (1993). Counselling Couples. New York, NY: SAGE.

Darling, C., & Cassidy, D. (2014). Family Life Education: Working with Families across the Lifespan. New York, NY: Waveland Press.

Furman, F. K. (2010). Compassionate listening as a path to conflict resolution. Journal for the Study of Peace and Conflict, 16(2), 24-38.

Gibson, D. (2008). Relationship Betrayal and the Influence of Religious Beliefs: A Case Illustration of Couples Counseling. The Family Journal, 16(4), 344-350.

Goldenberg, H., & Goldenberg, I. (1998). Counseling today’s families. New York, NY: Brooks/Cole Pub. Co.

Hawkins, R. E. (1991). Strengthening marital intimacy. Grand Rapids, MI: Baker Book House.

Payne, M. (2010). Couple Counselling: A Practical Guide. New York, NY: SAGE.

Seaward, B. (2011). Managing Stress: A Creative Journal. New York, NY: Jones & Bartlett Publishers.

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