Category: Mother

Self-Efficacy is one’s knowledge of how well one will complete a certain task. Also, self-efficacy is something that comes from within; how one was brought up and an individual’s approach at goals can determine the self-efficacy. I scored 63 out of 65 on my questionnaire; this equals out to be a 93 on a grading scale. When first looking at this assignment the first thought was on the self-efficacy score. I did not think the range would be in the 90s. I rated myself with a 3 on, if I practiced every day, I could just about develop any skill (Gaumer Erickson, A.S. & Noonan. 2018, pg. 175-176). Life experiences have pushed me to approach tasks with an idea that not everything is in reach. Several factors can come to play on rather self-efficacy was low in this department due to prenatal development and attachment studies.

There are 3 stages of prenatal development: germinal, embryonic, and fetal. A very important human ‘masterpiece’ the brain is developed, during the late embryonic stages between 3-8 weeks. Choices made during this time from the mother can affect how well the neurons communicate. The actions people take are held accountable for each thought and action, a human will have until the end of life (Belsky, 2019). The choice to take recreational drugs or drink alcohol can harm the brain development causing the baby to process information more slowly than others or potentially result in death. The hippocampus is an important part of the brain that helps with learning and memory. If the hippocampus becomes compromised an individual would be unlikely to produce an educated response and therefore neglect the ability to complete a task, no matter the practice.

My family struggles with self-efficacy like many other families throughout their lives. They believed they could not complete college and for some even high school. They started using drugs and alcohol. My mom had me when she was 19 and lost my dad when I was 18 months. Bowlby believed the need for attachment was crucial and biologically embedded in individuals (Belsky, 2019). Attachment is an emotional bond between relationships, such as a parent and an infant. Primary attachment is vital for development, relationships built during early life can determine one’s mental health. The attachment response was to be physically close to the mother. The thought is the attachment stages would drive the type of person an infant will become. Throughout ages, especially toddler years, the kid could become easily distressed when guidance is absent. The phase that they call ‘landmark’ stage is the clear-cut attachment stage. This is when the toddler needs to feel physically close to their caregiver and see that someone is watching (Belsky, 2019). After age 3, they will develop an internal working model and take what they learned and use them in other relationships throughout their lifespan.

Psychologists believed an infant with an insecure attachment will face more difficult problems (Belsky, 2019). The belief that they will not succeed will dismay any tasks they may have potentially set for themselves. Studies showed oxytocin can alternate the sensitivity to the insecure attachment. A caregiver can be universal. My nurture was my grandmother. I moved a lot between my hometown of Quincy and Alton growing up. I would get securely attached to my grandma more than others. She became my social reference, and now today I have high self-efficacy when handling motherhood!

A mother is a person who is known as a strong woman and a flexible one. She plays an important role in all aspects of our life. All of us, we call her the light of our home. In the four corners of our house, her light always shines.

She is the most lovable person in the whole world we all know. His unconditional love, unending care, and life sacrifices are those things that make a way for her to be connected with us. Our hearts and lives will always be connected in her heart and life. No matter what happens or no matter how far the distance we are right now from her, her love will never change. Even sometimes we tend to focus on the other people and we forgot her, she is the one who will make a way to win us back again.

Our mother has a deep connection with us. This connection definitely cannot be compared by anyone else. No one can describe or understand the strong connection and bonding of a mother to her children. We know that our connection to our mother starts from the day we born. Because of that connection, she can even understand us when we are infants without any communication. She knows when we are hungry, she knows why we are crying, she knows when we are sick and she knows what makes us happy. This connection continues til in our adult life.

A mother is a person who always there for us in times of happiness, sadness, tough times or any season of our life. She is always willing to listen to all our life concerns. She is the first person who feels hurt when we get hurt. She is our loyal and number one fan whenever we have big or small achievements in life. She is the most concerned or worried one whenever we are in the wrong direction. She is the one who can always forgive us no matter how many wrong things we have done. She is always willing to accept us when all the people around us cannot accept us. She is a person who can understand us.

Her role in our home is not only a helper or nanny. Many people have a wrong understanding and perspective about the role of a mother in a home. Some people look at her as a helper or nanny because she can do all things inside the house and others look at her as a villain because some of the members of the family misinterpret all her advice. We should look at her as a special and important person in our family, without her all of us will suffer in many things. For example, if our mother is not in our house and no one can cook food, who will cook? If someone in our family is sick, who will be willing to sleep late and take care of him or her? Those are a simple example of the time that we can’t live without our mother.

We can surely say that without her we can feel that something is missing. Whatever situation we have in our life, believe it or not, we always want her to be with us. Because we know that she is the only person who will be willing to stay with us until we get better. We know that she is the person whom we can trust. She is our shoulder that we can always lean on. She is our strength but for her, we are her strength.

The love of our mother cannot compare to the love of other people. She always looks after our family and protects all of us. She always tries her best to give the best things to her children. We can also describe the word mother as selfless love, because for her to make her children or family happy she can give and sacrifice anything.

All of these words are not enough to describe how much we admire our mother. She is so amazing. One important thing that we can give to her is not only our words of respect but more important is also the love that our mothers wanted from us.

What’s the essence of a mother?

The essence of becoming a mother is almost infinite. Mother is a defender, a disciplinary and a friend. Mother is a selfless, loving human being who has to sacrifice much of his wants and needs for the wants and needs of his son. A mother works hard to make sure that her child is equipped with the knowledge, skills and abilities to make her a competent human being. Being a mother is probably the toughest, most fulfilling work a woman will ever have.

Purpose of a mother

To be a mother means to teach your child basic rules and roles in life, from being an empathetic human being to learning how to be responsible for one’s actions. As your child grows up, they will face the onslaught of various ideas, viewpoints and beliefs from their peers, movies, the internet, television and magazines. A mother will help direct her child to find out about their aspirations and beliefs in life and to teach them the importance of schooling, etiquette and more.

Why should we respect a mother?

Not all women can be mothers, just those who deserve the most respect from everyone who walks the planet. Too many times women raise their children by themselves, work two or three jobs to provide for them, and even though words are not spoken, their love is known to all. A mother is someone who never complains about her children’s mistakes, but it also encourages their importance to the wonderful adults. A mother will never put her children down, but she will find any way to bring them up.

A mother will never deliberately harm a child, either psychologically or physically, but will offer a fair puncture when the need arises. A mother is going to push her child to be the best they can be, not to condone their bad conduct, because that’s what all the other women do. A mother is going to speak to her children about the world we live in and educate them about stuff they need to know, even though they’re talking about drugs, sex, or war. A mother doesn’t forget what she’s taught, so she’s going to get better because of it. Some of us in this world have never had the easy way out or been given everything to us on a silver platter, but as a woman and a mother, she deserves to be respected because when everything else fails, she will be the one to pick up the pieces and make things right.

She’s going to sit up at night and think about not just her own children and grandchildren, but also her friends. She will hope and pray that no matter what happens, there will be a good outcome, and if it doesn’t, there will be some kind of comfort. There is no way to repay what she has done for us, all we can do is try giving what she needs and it is just time, love and respect.

Reflection allows for more practical career growth as it means that nurse associate can act on their learning, makes it possible for the code to become the subject of the action and strengthen the quality of treatment provided to patients. It increases understanding of one-self and desires to change. (Collins et al., 2015) My reflection is based on the Gibbs (1998) reflective cycle. The Mother and child is the field of nursing I am reflecting on.

One morning on my alternative placement, I was observing a health visitor examining a mother who had brought her baby to the clinic. The purpose of the visit was to ensure that the health visitor would do a new baby review within 10 to 14 days of the birth. (DH, 2009) which included the baby girl’s physical examination and development review. The parent had the opportunity to voice all mother and child concerns. It also allows the health visitor to provide a health promoting guide on safe sleeping to avoid the syndrome of infant death, vaccinations, breastfeeding for babies and bottle feeding.

The health visitor obtained consent before commencing the consultation in line with the NMC code of conduct (2018). I was introduced by the health visitor to the mother and asked if I could take part in the consultation, and she agreed. The baby’s mother already knew the health visitor because of her three- year- old son’s previous clinical appointments. The son was playing with his toys in the room. I spent some time playing with him to keep him occupied so that the mother could focus on the baby and answer questions of the health visitor.

The health visitor asked the mother how she was coping with the baby and the rest of the family. She used her observational skills to assess how the mother was coping with her baby. The mother stated that she was alright, although she felt tired. The husband was helpful around the house. The mother was concerned that her three-year-old son had become insecure since the birth of the baby, since the baby got the most of the attention, not him.

The health visitor asked the mother how she was feeding the baby and whether she had been getting enough sleep. The mother expressed no concerns for the baby and herself. The baby appeared alert, content, sleeping well. The health visitor was constantly observing how relaxed or worried the mother might be, indicating whether she could maintain a conversation while interacting with her baby and paying attention.

The health visitor concluded to by informing her of the importance of continuing to use the baby clinic for weight checks and directed the new mother through the personal child health record book provided after the baby is born, used to monitor the baby’s weight, height and vaccinations. (NHS, 2020) The mother may also add information to the red book such as recording any injuries, baby accidents and any medication the baby is taking.

I was grateful to have been able to assist during the consultation. I enjoyed playing with the son; at first, I was very apprehensive and gradually seemed to have gained his trust. I was impressed to see how well the mother was managing with the baby and her three-year-old son. The health visitor had evidently developed a good rapport with the mother, which helped her to communicate effectively. I also felt that this helped the mother to allow me to stay in the room and being open to me observing the consultation and play with her son.

Only a few years after Efuru’s first marriage, the concept of motherhood rise upward in the novel and becomes Efuru’s major problem. Obligatory motherhood is the downfall for Efuru based on cultural concepts. Her traditional community expects and demands that she become a mother. Approximately two years after her marriage to Adizua, she is concerned about her state; she says to herself, ‘`I am still young, surely God cannot deny me the joy of motherhood” (24). Her mother-in-law believes, however, that God is in charge and ‘a child would come when God willed it’ (24). The statements of both women are significant. Interestingly, Efuru, who has ignored courtship and marital traditions, shows concern to obey cultural traditions about motherhood while her mother-in-law recognizes that a higher power has control. However, she, too, secretly wants to keep negative voices away from her family. These women are struggling to please several groups—society, self, and family—and finding the struggle difficult, and even impossible. An examination of the words used by these women further illustrates this point. Efuru often says to herself; ‘God cannot deny me the joy of motherhood’ (24).

The strength and determination of the words ‘cannot deny’ in contrast to ‘will not’ indicate that Efuru has already made her choice for her future. What about the meaning of the words ‘joy of motherhood’? These words imply a rich and fulfilling role in life. It is clear from the diction assigned to Efuru that Nwapa is supporting motherhood. However, the words used by Efuru and her mother-in-law—emphasizing God’s will—indicate to the reader and community that whether one becomes a mother is not just based on desire and tradition but biological health as determined by a superior power. The words used in the two sentences above indicate a struggle among women themselves, for they do want children, but at the same time realize it is God’s choice whether they are able to bear children or not. These words suggest what Don Bialostosky calls the ‘mixed diction’ of Bakhtin’s dialogism (216-17). Mixed diction occurs when the characters speak and the narrator also speaks as she reports the characters’ speech. The two women seem to speak and think with one voice, but they oppose and reinforce each other at the same time. Both know the truth, but the mother-in-law privately wishes Efuru and her son would marry a second wife to give children to the family and remove social stigma from the family.

The concept of motherhood is a major concern for Efuru, Adizua, and Adizua’s mother. According to Carole Davies, the second characteristic of African feminism is called into question. This attribute focuses on the inequities and limitations found in traditional societies, conditions that create the struggle that Efuru and her mother-in-law reflect through their speech acts. They realize God will determine when and if a woman should become a mother. However, society still ostracizes women who are not able to get pregnant and even blames the women when the men have physical medical problems. One must ask why does someone have to be responsible or made a scapegoat for a nonhuman situation? After Efuru and Adizua try many times to conceive a child, they seek traditional avenues to help the situation. To remedy the problem, Efuru and her father visit a dibia who tells them Efuru will have few children and they must come back to see him for further information; he also gives specific instructions for her to follow, which includes making sacrifices to the ancestors on Afo Day, buying certain items at the market, then placing them in a calabash basket, and allowing the basket to float away.

After obeying the instructions, she and Adizua have a baby girl. Efuru has her baby in a quiet and unobtrusive manner while her husband is sleeping in the house. He awakens afterwards when he hears a baby crying and exclaims that the birth is not a dream; it is real. He says to his daughter, ”Welcome my daughter. Your name is Ogonim’ (32). It is the custom, for individuals to show their thanks to the dibia; Adizua and Efuru visit him and take gifts; however, when he opens several kola nuts, he sees something that bothers him, and he tells the couple to return to him on a certain day. Unfortunately, the dibia dies before their second visit. A connection is implied between the dibia’s earlier comment about Efuru’s having few babies, the opened kola nuts, and the couple’s future; and subsequent events confirm the connection. Although Ogonim acts like any normal child for two years, playing with her nurse maid, Ogea, and other children, the marriage begins to fail—for example, Adizua does not sleep with Efuru for six months-and Ogonim suddenly develops a fever, starts having convulsions, and eventually dies. The family makes preparations for Ogonim’s burial, but Adizua fails to attend his daughter’s finical. According to Efuru, the death of her daughter is a sure indicator that her marriage to Adizua is over; there is no bond between them.

The women in Efuru’s natal village also discuss what is best for young, beautiful Efuru, who is now a deserted wife and motherless woman since her child died. She is greeted by well wishers and no neighbors. One woman tells her not to say her husband left her but to say she left her husband because `’Wives leave husbands not the other way around’ (90). Efuru laughs that thing to me,” but the woman, the voice insists that ‘`it is not the same thing’ (90). Others say she has made the right choice to return to her village. They remind her that she is young and beautiful, from a good family; thus, she will find a husband in the future. The most profound comments come from her maid Ogea’s parents. They acknowledge hearing about Efuru’s marital problems and state they have no intention of judging her, but they do condemn Adizua’s not returning to bury his and Efuru’s only child as repugnant. They conclude, ‘It showed that he hates [you]. So you have done well in leaving him. You are young, so the day is just breaking for you, other suitors will come. Just have patience’ (94).

My role model is My Mother. My mother is not famous not even a celebrity or known personality but for me, she is more than a celebrity or famous person. Her love for all of her children is the same and equal She is well-managed in organizing a joint family system and house. Whenever she is around I feel safe, happy, and blessed. She is my best friend too I share all of my problems with her without any fear. She forgive me every time for my all silly and even my biggest mistakes. A mother can be a perfect example and role model for every daughter.

Her sincerity and love towards her family, responsibilities, and house chores are incomparable. On Sunday, when everyone is off from their duties and resting, she is the only one who is still working to make our Sunday a perfect Sunday. She is that much selfless that every day she got burnt while cooking, got cuts while chopping, made her hands dry and rough while washing, still at the end of the day at the dinner table, she served perfect food with a smiling face and restless look from which we cannot even think what she has been going through the whole day. My mother is suffering from thyroid, seeing her every night eating 5-6 tablets of 500-1000 mg, her teary eyes, and her pain, but still, she wakes up every day to make meals for us.

Another great trait of my mother is that she is a great listener, she listens to everything of mine without even judging me, and as a great counselor, counsels me in the best way she can. She raised me up so well that I am unable to give her back what she did for me every day. Whenever I choose wrong over right she is always beside me to guide me and show me the right path. Patiently, she always supported me in every decision of mine even though she knew that my decision is wrong still she supported made me more strong, more mature, and more confident.

My inspiration, idol, and role model is my mother. I wanted to be exactly like her selfless, patient, friendly and supportive. She is the standard that I will forever try to strive to achieve. I am the luckiest person to have a mother’s love because the worst thing is for those who never experienced what it feels like to be loved by a mother. May ALLAH give a happy, long and healthy life to all mothers around the world. (AMEEN)

With each era beginning it comes to an end. All the time our world is changing, and we are the ones responsible of fixing it. We then each create our own ideas and superheroes. With different problems come different superheroes. Henry Ford, Batman and a librarian. All different looks, clothing and jobs, yet they serve the same purpose for looking after our community. Some superheroes are glorified and some aren’t even heard of. We aren’t currently living with Batman and Superman, but we still have our world savers. Superheroes are everywhere, so how do you spot them. Superheroes are courage, but not always physically gifted. They sometimes even risk their lives for others, but superheroes aren’t always so dramatic. They can still have big impacts on the world without endangering themselves. They inspire others and create a new line of superheroes in every generation.

My superhero is my mum, and not only for her amazing upbringing, but also for her hard work and dedication. My mum is Italian and grew up with a brother 6 years younger than her. In primary school, my mum has always had an obsession with books and reading and carried it through to high school. My mum was a strait A student. She grew up to end up continuing her passion for books and now works for a library. My mum has worked for the library for 38 years and still dedicates her time. My mum sees new people every day, builds trust and gains a bond with them. She helps the old and the young. She takes her time to speak to individuals and help them in whatever way she can. Without being asked to, she will deliver ordered books from old people to their houses.

My mum isn’t just any boring librarian, she is different, and she goes out of her way to help people who can’t use the library laptops, etc. My mum values happiness as that’s what she brings to the table for everyone who comes into the library. She has a positive attitude and inspires kids to read and write. My mum has been with the library for 38 years and over the time has built trust, respect and bonds with so many people. With such a kind and loving person like her, it gives people a reason to get out of bed and get out of the house to go to the library. With a person like her, everyone can ensure they are safe and will have no problems.

In order to understand the single mother community, it is important to not only look at worldly perceptions but also at how single mothers view themselves. This cohort is statistically growing every year. In fact, the Australian Bureau of Statistics (2006) cited that 21% of all families with young children were headed by a single female in Australia in 2011. This marks a 7% increase from 1986 (as cited in Le & Miller, 2013). Therefore, multiple countries have implemented measures in order to support this vulnerable group. In particular, the Nordic region of Europe is recognized for its progressive standards, specifically regarding work. In Sweden, the government has federal childcare programs and policies that focus on gender and family equality. As publicized by The Swedish National Agency for Education (2007), 9 out of 10 children between the ages 1 in 5 are in Swedish public childcare services, spending an average of 32 hours a week there (as cited in Roman, 2017). Fritzell (2011) suggested that the cultural expectation in Sweden that all parents should remain employed increases the use of federal services (as cited in Roman, 2017). However, even with strong supportive measures, many single mothers have difficulty utilizing the resources they are entitled to.

In a qualitative study, 39 Swedish single mothers spoke about their experiences regarding time and money constraints. Common themes emerged for each interview, many speaking on the significance of close social networks. Single mothers were heavily dependent on their social networks, or secondary caregivers. These individuals would supplement the mothers’ care in work-schedule conflicts and unpredictable events (e.g. if a child got sick). Mothers expressed immense gratitude for this support, however, they felt guilty and indebted to their social network. The interviewed mothers also discussed the ‘money-care dilemma’, or the time dedication to work in order to financially support their children even though this resulted in less primary care time (Roman, 2017, p. 33). Thus, single mothers felt like they were unable to successfully achieve the standard of being a ‘good’ parent as they were unable to be as involved in their children’s lives in comparison to wedding mothers (Roman, 2017).

These themes are similar to Black single working mothers in America. Like Sweden, America holds mothers to a standard of involved parenting or intensive mothering. Mothers are expected to delegate an immense amount of time and emotions into their mothering, in order to feel validated as a good mothers. Elliot, Powell, and Brenton (2015) conducted a case study on 16 low-income black single mothers to gather information on how an intersectional identity influences a mother’s view on parenting. In the United States, as cited by Kriedel and Ellis (2011), “50.4% of black children lived with single mothers, compared with 18.5% of white children (as cited in Elliot et al., 2015, p. 353). Therefore, it is known that the majority of single mothers and children raised by single mothers in the United States are among the black racial group. These women stressed the importance of protection, self-reliance, and sacrifice. They viewed their own involvement in parenting to be the determinant of whether or not their child succeeds, not blaming the constraints. Mothers sacrificed their education, and romantic, and social lives in order for their children to have better lives. For example, one participant, Millicent, shared that she sacrificed her own education in order to work more to support her children. This is a paradox as her stability in the long term will be reduced without higher education (Elliot et al., 2015, 2015).

All of the mothers emphasized that their children will always be put first, putting their needs before their own (Elliot et al., 2015). This idea is reflected in Le and Miller’s (2013) analysis of the 2006 Australian Time Use Survey as single mothers were the most unsatisfied with their time allocation. This study included 6,902 adults that kept a time diary for two days. Single mothers participated 36 minutes less a day in primary child care and 16 minutes less a day in leisure activities, compared to partnered mothers. The tension of time allocation caused single mothers to have the lowest satisfaction, which correlated to overall lower well-being (Le & Miller, 2013). Therefore, it is important to continue to research the supportive systems for all working single mothers as this population is vulnerable.

Introduction

A mother has a significant role in the everyday lives of children. It is a relation that is formed from the day a woman conceives. It’s a part of her body. Mother loves and sacrifices her children without any expectation, although there is some kind of expectation in other relationships. Even in husband wife’s relation. It is said that the mother experiences it or feels the same when the child gets hurt. Mother gets it what her child needs without articulating a word, a single word. Her happiness totally depends on her children. She will always wish for their best. It comes from within.

Nowadays the maids act like mothers. The mother stays outside and the baby is attached to the maid. I’ve seen instances where a child gets the love of a mother from a maid. God was not able to reach every one, so he made mothers. However, we still have to remember that our mother is the one who give birth to us and we must appreciate her sacrifices.

In What Ways does a Mother Sacrifice her Life?

Went through a Painful Experience

In what methods does a mother sacrifice her life? A mother sacrifices her life, to bring us into this world. She went through a painful experience just to have us. Just consider the sluggish hunger and dehydration she is experiencing. A number of studies have found that when a mother feels unprepared or struggling to cope with all the changes to their physical health, they are more likely feel overwhelmed, stressed, anxious or depressed and your appearance will change. For example, their hair may start falling out more than usual. Your skin might feel drier, and you may notice stretch marks on your belly and breasts. Ive heard it stated that is one of the maximum brutal and tortuous deaths one may want to ever experience. Although all the pain she went through, she has chosen her path by sheer willpower. For the affection of her child is instinctual, and really well worth the sacrifice. But she continued to live, in a state of weakness, to see me become an adult, get married, and have kids. One of the most famous women we know which is Kardashian West recounted the painful way of giving birth. Her placenta was removed after giving birth to her daughter North on her blog, ‘My doctor had to stick his entire arm in me and detach the placenta with his hand, scraping it away from my uterus with his fingernails,’ she wrote. ‘How disgusting and painful” https://www.insider.com/kim-kardashian-surrogate-placenta-accreta-2017-9. And that has proven that a mother sacrificed her life to give birth to us.

Happiness

Anything that a mother does for her children is time she should do for herself. That is why people who do not have children commonly cease of being egocentric and self-serving. They get used to considering themselves and don’t reflect on consideration on others’ needs. I believe that every mom has her own set of challenging circumstances specific to her and no individual has it more difficult or simpler because a mother no longer includes a manual. Some mothers have to go to work every day to get money just to raise us right and get everything that we want. She had to cancel her plans with her friends just to pick us up from school. She’d stay all night with a sick baby, work fingers to bone on a school project after putting in hours at the office, painstakingly plans beautiful birthday parties, sacrificing her own mental, physical and emotional energy all the time in favor of the needs of everyone else. Some might have to sacrifice their dream to become a housewife. For example, Elizabeth Hurley sacrificed her movie career to concentrate on raising her six-years old son. https://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/entertainment/english/hollywood/news/Clear-headed-Farrah-praised-by-doctor/articleshow/4556719.cms. It’s so hard sometimes when being a mother means lack of time for themselves, lack of understanding from others including their husband, having to deal with everything including work while exhausted, and being criticized by anyone for everything just because, they are being expected to be the perfect mother, wife and professional while being chronically tired and sleep deprived. Mothers are very strong and all they could think of is when they look at their child and it’s all worth it. All the chaos, they would still treasure their child and it’s their little miracle.

What are Issues Faced by Modern-day Moms?

As kids grow up, they expect mothers to understand their feelings and needs. The environment and neighborhood in which our mothers grew up might be a lot different from the present scenario. So, the kid might expect their mother to know everything up to date. Of course, not all the kids are same. It’s not compulsory for mothers to know all the things that the child is interested in. But our mother must have tried to understand our interests and motivated us towards following it. Our mother had her own plans about their kids but when she realized that we had our own dream, she was the first person to stand with us. Furthermore, at some point in our ‘growing up stage’, kids tend to deviate from all the morals and values taught to them. So, for the mother, steering them towards the right path is another challenge.

Struggling to Teach Good Values

Just like a garden where you can look after, tend and maintain a garden and see signs that tell you the garden is doing beautifully in the short term. Foliage, flowering and signs of growth and health may be present. Such signs are essential, but they do not necessarily predict, guarantee or demonstrate what the future will look like. Children who talks with you, share about their day, their highs, their lows, their frustrations and their joys. You may have kids who simply want to play, eat, and do stuff of their own. Any of these things may be as much a symbol of a happy and as a symbol of an unhappy child. Nowadays, some mothers, for example girls at age 17 giving birth to a child are struggling to teach their child a good value because they are still immature and still have a lot to learn.

Lawrence Kohlberg

Researcher, Kohlberg, Lawrence, 1984, Essays in Moral Development (Volume 1: The Philosophy of Moral Development), Harper and Row, 1981; Volume 2: The Psychology of Moral Development, San Francisco: Harper and Row. who wrote an article on ‘12 Values You Must to Teach Your Child in 2020’? In his article, he collects important information about raising a better kid and becoming better at parenting. In his article ‘12 Values You Must to Teach Your Child in 2020’ he conveys a lot of information and ways to teach good values.

How to Teach Good Values?

One of important thing to teach good values is to teach your child to respect. Be respectful of them. Treat them the way you expect that others will be handled. Do a problem-solve way together so they can get what they want. Include thoughts on how to work around the requirements of others. Even when they don’t feel it, it’s much easier for children to behave respectfully if they have been appreciated, seen what respect looks like, and been helped to be respectful. One of the biggest obstacles to respecting children’s learning is that conventional parenting is extremely disrespectful to children. Parents have historically treated children in ways they would never treat an adult they cared for in their relationship. “You can’t be hungry!” “You’ve just eaten” or “Shut the door!” “Were you born in a barn?’ ‘No, you can’t have another cookie. You’ve had enough”. Conventionally, raising children is an endless stream of instructions. Picture you’re old and decrepit, and your child is repeating it back to you. And children understand that certain types of answers are okay ways to treat people. If you mean to act appropriately by behaving, then coach the child beforehand. Let them know what the situation is going to be like and how individuals are expected to act. But don’t assume that knowing is the same thing that knowing can do. Be with your baby. Be something they are also unable to be. Let them see how they’re doing. If the child really can’t behave as required by a situation, then get them out of there. Trust that they’re doing the best they can.

Conclusion

Today we are all here because of our mother. We should never disrespect our mother, don’t ignore and underestimate her sacrifices. She gives us wonderful life, she raises us better than she had been, and she would always keep trying to give better than she ever had. She never wishes her children unwell, even in her wildest dreams. A mother will always try show us right path and being a motivator. A mother gives up all for their kids and forgive all mistakes made by kids.

Motherhood is different from womanhood. Motherhood is not a natural condition; it is an institution that presents itself as a natural outcome of biologically given differences as a natural consequence of heterosexual activity and as a natural manifestation of an innate female characteristic, namely the maternal instinct. Motherhood has been seen as a source of women’s strength and uniqueness, a site of being entirely feminine and that draws upon women’s special qualities and knowledge (Carol 1996: 38). Feminists in Africa such as Molara Ogundipe-Leslie, Aduke Adebayo, Chinyere G. Okafor, while conceding that motherhood may at times operate in an oppressive manner, have tried to read other meanings to motherhood, which are empowering for women. Within these meanings, they agree that giving birth bestows a certain status on women even mystical powers. African traditions point to this fact.

Society frames women to occupy different positions- a mother, a wife, a daughter, a priestess, a prophetess, a witch, or a possessed entity and these positions inform the way they are interacted with in society. In Africa, motherhood is given a premium space in society; the highest value is given to a woman who has gone through the stages of motherhood- childbearing to nurturing a child. The Yoruba culture believes so much in motherhood because motherhood itself is spiritual and beyond human reasoning and not every woman can successfully go through the stages of motherhood. Those who passed through the stages successfully are given appraisal through songs, proverbs, and art.

According to Akujobi (2011), among the Yoruba, motherhood is said to confer privileges that give credence to the very foundations of society and women’s presumed roles in it and thus symbolize fertility, fecundity, and fruitfulness. The Yoruba saying, (‘mother is gold, the father is a mirror’) goes a long way in showing the importance of motherhood in African society. Mothers are gold: strong, valuable, true, and central to a child’s existence. Motherhood is not always as smooth as it seems it is also self-denying. Adrienne Rich (1996: 45) posits that although the reality of motherhood is experienced by women, the institution is ably controlled by men because the experience is being interpreted by men and the structure they control.

A woman is viewed as a source or necessity for procreation. She is also seen as a necessary evil in which that society cannot do without. She is promoted to an esteemed position- a golden figure. In the Yoruba culture, a child is seen as a coral bead, silver, and any woman who has not possessed a child has not lived a fulfilled life. Buchi Emecheta dwells on the concept of motherhood in most of her books, especially in ‘Joys of Motherhood’ (1979) and ‘Second Class Citizen (1974). Also, Flora Nwapa mirrors this concept in her ‘Efuru’ (1966), where childlessness and failed marriages mandate a literary criticism that mirrors the importance of children in the African family. Mbiti (1970) recognizes the concept of ‘motherhood’ when he says that, it is central to African philosophy and spirituality. Motherhood is a joyful and privileged state for the woman because, in pregnancy, the woman is said to ‘glow and shine’ and she receives special treatment, especially from her husband and her mother-in-law (Akujobi 2011:3). He also said that no matter the skills, desires, and talents of a woman, her primary function is that of motherhood, at least in Africa. Unlike the West where reproduction is subject to agreement between couples whether or not to have children is well spelled out before marriage, but this is not so in Africa where every woman aspires to be a mother someday. Motherhood in Africa is seen as a God-giving role and for this reason, it is sacred. Some argue that there is a superior maternal instinct which is part of a woman’s biology that is connected to her child.

Motherhood whether blood mother, another mother or a community mother is seen as a symbol of power. According to Littlefield (2007: 54), ‘motherhood is a unique relationship between mother and child, one which is seen as the basic requirement for child development. Mothers nurse their children, provide love, affection, and guidance and shape primary development.’ mothers are therefore at the prime center of societal development. Motherhood is seen as an experience and an institution which can be seen from its different definitions by different writers both male and female in our contemporary times. This concept is profoundly shaped by our social context and culture which has informed or influenced our ideology.

The figure of a mother is seen as a deity, Yoruba believes there is no deity like a mother and it is the mother that is worthy of being worshipped. Motherhood is said to possess some spiritual power and that is why some symbols are used to represent a woman which is being worshipped (Makinde2004). Motherhood is germane in the Yoruba culture because the preservation of humans depends on the role of mothers in society ( Lawal 1996). The preservation of a child’s life also depends on the mother- the vagina and the breast. The breast, (omú) is to keep and strengthen the child with the inexhaustible flow of milk and the vagina, (path from heaven) is a source of power where life and death lies. Therefore, the existence of a child is solely in the hands of a mother.

Despite the multiple roles played by the woman – wife, homemaker, grandmother, and mother, many mothers still play the role of caregiver. The term caregiving is widely used and has been studied from, a variety of scientific perspectives including in nursing, sociology, and psychology (Connell 2003; Mendez luck, Kennedy, and Wallace 2009).

The Merriam-Webster Dictionary 2021 defines a caregiver as a person who provides direct care for children, elderly people, or the chronically ill. Drentea (2007) refers to caregiving as ‘the act of providing unpaid assistance and support to family members or acquaintances that have physical, psychological or developmental needs.’ Caregiving is also the process of helping another person who is unable to do things for themselves in a holistic (physically, mentally, emotionally, and socially) manner. Caregiving is facilitated by certain character traits, emotions, skills, knowledge, time, and emotional connection with the recipient.

Caregiving is not just a role; it also entails building a relationship with the individual which involves emotional care and commitment to the relationship. Caregiving is being responsible for someone other than oneself. Caregivers exert their energy on their recipient’s interests and feelings, putting aside their own problems or feelings and paying maximum attention to the recipient. Caregiving involves the emotional connection between the caregiver and the recipient. Holistic care in caregiving is supported by the works of (Pearlin, L. K., Mullan, J. T., Semple, S. J., & Skaff, M. M. (1990), who explicitly stated that one must possess the affective component of caring to provide caregiving. Emotional connection and holistic care are closely related, both extending beyond attending to the ‘Physical’ being. It refers to relating to and caring for a person on an emotional level, being able to share their feelings with the caregiver, being open-minded, vulnerable and trusting the caregiver not to hurt them emotionally.