Category: Family

Introduction

Mount Everest is the highest mountain in the world. It stands at 5.5 miles above sea level. For a number of centuries, the mountain was considered to be a sacred place. The mountain was not known to many people around the world for a number of years. According to Steve Jenkin, a renowned specialist in sports and recreation, it was not until about 180 years ago that the mountain became known to many (Jenkins, 1999, p.23). Since then, various groups including adventurers, scientists, and other climbers have been fascinated by the features of Mount Everest especially the peak. A significant number of individuals have succeeded in reaching the peak but others have failed or even died. Most of the people who have been to the peak of Mount Everest describe it to be a place of great beauty and their climbing of the mountain as a great adventure but of immense danger (Jenkins, 1999, p.23). Some individuals have referred to Mount Everest as a field of corpses. Despite this, people still try to conquer the mountain. In order to conquer the mountain, a high degree of coordination and teamwork is necessary. According to Ann, Heinrichs, a specialist in extreme sports, climbing the mountain with pride and disrespect can lead to a disaster (2010, p. 57).

In evaluating and analyzing the project, Christopher Johns framework is used. According to three scholars who include Anna Adams, Christopher, Kayes, and David Kolb, Christopher Johns framework is composed of four main steps. These include experience, reflection, influencing factors, alternatives or other choices, and the lessons learned (2008, p.45).

Experience

To reach the peak of the mountain, the project involved a team of four people. Working on the project was a great experience. This is due to the fact that it presented an opportunity to develop my leadership skills. In addition, the team project presented an opportunity to develop other skills by sharing with other team members. Two computer technology specialists Sarmiento, John, and Stahl George (2008, p.492), are of the opinion that teamwork leads to the acquisition of new skills and techniques. This is due to the fact that different individuals have diverse skills. For example, some of the team members were of the opinion that the team should consult the Sherpa people on mountain climbing. This is because they have sufficient knowledge of mountain climbing since they live in high altitudes.

The project was very successful. This arose from the fact that the team members were assigned roles in which they were well conversant. According to Srinivas Kandula, a human resource management specialist, the success of a team is dependent on the effectiveness with which the entire task is divided into small tasks and assigned to the various team members according to their skills and experience (2007, p.173). Sundstrom Erick, a teamwork specialist (1999, p.45), further asserts that individual commitment in a team is what leads to the success of teamwork.

The team project worked as expected. This arose from the fact that all the team members understood their duties in addition to adhering to the set time frame of completing the task. Additionally, I was involved in detailed planning in cooperation with other members of the team. As the team strategist, I appreciated the importance of taking authority in ensuring that all the team members understood the significance of following the formulated strategies in an effort to ensure the attainment of the groups mission. In order to achieve its goal, a team leader must have the power to ensure that the team succeeds. One of the forms of power that I appreciated in leading a team as the team strategist leader is personal power. According to Peter Guy Northouse (2010, p. 8), a team leader must have personal power which is derived from possessing sufficient knowledge or being likable.

From the team project, I appreciated the importance of developing expert knowledge, especially when developing strategies that the team would follow in climbing the mountain. This is due to the fact that climbing Mount Everest presents a great challenge that can lead to death. Therefore, there is no room for mistakes.

One of the factors which contributed to my experience is the diverse viewpoints that were put across by the other team members. According to Hernadez Simon, a marketing specialist, teamwork aids in minimizing risks inherent in the process of executing a particular task single-handedly (2002). This is because the various parties assist each other. Upon developing the strategies which the team would follow to reach the top of the mountain, I was under an obligation to share them with the other team members. As a result, I was required to defend my ideas and prove that they were effective. Despite the fact that I took into account the recommendations made by the group members, I appreciated the importance of sharing executing the plan in a way in which others could not.

Reflection

According to Kavita Singh (2010, p. 240), a specialist in organizational behavior, it is vital for individuals intended to form a team to conduct a concrete analysis of the task ahead. One of the ways through which this can be achieved is by taking into account Tuckmans model of group development. The model consists of five stages which include forming, storming, norming, performing, and adjourning. In the forming stage, the available resources and the task at hand are taken into consideration (Singh, 2010, p. 240). At the storming stage, the group members clearly understand their roles. At the norming stage, Sarmiento, John, and Stahl, George (2008), group dynamic specialists assert that the group members start resolving their differences. In the performing stage, norms to guide the operation of the group are established. After the completion of the task, the group is disbanded. During the establishment of the group, these stages were followed.

According to Daniel Levi, a specialist in group dynamics, there are different challenges involved in the process of executing its roles. Hansen, Richard, a business and economist specialist (2006, p.11), it is important for the parties involved to adopt strategies that are effective. This means that the team must have a member who is knowledgeable in the formulation of strategies.

In the group, I played the role of a strategist assistant. For a number of years, I had been involved in a number of projects which made me appreciate the importance of formulating effective strategies. My role was to ensure that there were well-laid strategies to ensure that the group reached the top of the mountain. To ensure that the group was successful, the roles were clearly defined and divided amongst the group members. As a result, there was no overlapping of roles.

The group adopted my role. The decision to adopt the role arose from the realization of the challenges associated with climbing Mount Everest. In the process of formulating my strategies, I was guided by the inherent risk. According to two renowned professors from the University of Ottawa, Shaunna Burke and Terry Orlick, it takes approximately 2 months to reach the peak of the mountain. In addition, it is a dangerous task. According to Burke and Orlick (2007, p.43), approximately 300 people have died in an effort to reach the peak. Their death has resulted from a number of factors such as loss of will, fatigue, extreme weather conditions, loss of focus, high altitude sickness, and injury. Considering the inherent risk, the group came to a consensus that it was necessary for effective strategies to be put into place.

According to Sullivan (1998, p.341), the success of a team is dependent on its composition. Additionally, a team must have members with different skills and abilities to undertake the various tasks. Members of a particular team possess different personalities. These personalities include competitors, cooperators, and individualists. Competitors are mainly concerned with their individual success rather than that of a group. On the other hand, individualists are focused on attaining their personal goals. This means that the success or lack thereof is not a concern to competitors.

The cooperators are mainly focused on attaining the goals of the team. Additionally, cooperators are concerned with the outcome of their actions in addition to that of others. The dominant personality which characterizes our group is cooperators.

An alternative course of action

In addition to the basic strategies necessary to reach the peak of the mountain safely, I also considered the importance of preparing the team members mentally. One of the strategies which I incorporated is the use of imagery. I indicated to the team members the importance of imagining themselves at the peak of the mountain. This was necessary for preparing them to be acquainted with the difficult phases of climbing the mountain.

I also considered the importance of inquiring from the other team members about their thoughts and feelings on the expeditions. For example, considering the opinion of the team members aided in identifying other obstacles that might have been overlooked. For example, some of the issues which the team members raised relate to oxygen depletion, conflict with other climbers, and exhaustion. By considering the opinion of other team members I was able to avert possible conflicts that might limit the success of the team.

In setting the strategies, I also considered that it would be paramount to set short term goals to ensure that the success of the event. Considering the challenging task of climbing the mountain, short term goals are necessary. This arises from the fact that it would aid them in remaining focused. According to Forrester, William and Tashchian, Adam (2006, p.45), setting short term goals play a vital role in the process of attaining the desired goal. This is due to the fact that it eliminates possibilities of the team members from being overwhelmed by the immense size of the intended goal (William & Adam, 2006, p.45). The team members would be assigned roles according to their personalities. I would use the Belbin model in determining the main roles. According to the Belbin model, a team is composed of different roles arising from their personalities (Select Knowledge, 2007, p. 32). The main roles are illustrated in the chart below.

Source: Select Knowledge.

I would also consider training the team members on some of the necessary skills when climbing the mountain. Some of these strategies relate to safety so as to avoid injuries. This is due to the fact that the safety of the group is not only dependent on the group but also on individual responsibilities. Each of the members had to ensure that they adhere to the set safety regulations. Additionally, I would also consider training the team members so as to acclimatize them with a high attitude. These techniques would play a vital role in ensuring that the climbing expedition is successful.

Learning

The project presented me with an opportunity to understand the issues which are necessary for the success of the team. These skills can be of great importance in the business environment. According to two organizational behavior specialists, Belal Kaifi and Sulaiman Noori (2010, p.88), teams are an essential component in the success of the business, especially in the modern world. Teams are very effective in solving organizational challenges. Some of the issues I appreciated relate to the importance of all the team members understanding the mission, vision, and purpose of the team. Kaifi and Noori (2010, p.88) further assert that understanding the goals provide a sense of direction amongst all the team members. The project also provided an opportunity to appreciate the importance of translating the teams goals into specific, measurable, accurate, reliable, and time bound objectives. According to Glenn Parker (2009, p. 3), breaking down the teams goals into short term objectives increases the probability of a team succeeding. This is of great importance in the future when formulating objectives aimed at achieving specific goals.

Upon breaking down the overall goal into a number of tasks, the various team members should be assigned their respective roles in accordance with their skills and expertise. Michaelsen, Lincoln, Bauman Knight, and Fink, Lawrence who are renowned scholars in human resource management are of the opinion that the team leader must clarify the roles to avoid conflict of interest (2004, p. 45).

From the project, I also appreciated the importance of empowering team members in their roles. As a result, they can be able to make decisions without any influence. The resultant effect is a high degree of efficiency. The project also gave me an opportunity to appreciate the importance of selecting the right people in forming a team. This arises from the fact that the attainment of the teams goal is dependent on all the team members. This is further explained by Kaifi and Noori (2010, p. 99) who are of the opinion that, the success of a team is affected by the existing social cohesion. As a result, all members of the team must share their skills, capabilities, and expertise with others. In addition, selecting individuals with a common goal aids in creating an environment conducive to the operation of the team. This arises from the fact that all the team members will enjoy working with each other.

From the project, I also appreciated the importance of openness. According to Nath, Daniel (2008), a team is composed of individuals with different viewpoints and ideas. This might result in conflicts between team members. To avert this, team members must be ready to listen to the opinions of the other group members.

In addition, I also appreciated the importance of setting a timeframe in an effort to achieve a certain goal. The resultant effect is that the intended benefits are achieved.

Conclusion

The team project was a great opportunity for me to understand the importance of working as a team. For example, I appreciated the importance of role clarification amongst the various team members. This is due to the fact that the success of the teams is dependent on the contribution of all the team members. Additionally, clarification of roles aids in averting conflict of interest amongst the team members. After assigning team roles, the various parties should be given the authority to make their own decisions. They should not be restrained from acting in any way. The existence of freedom of action will ensure that the team members are motivated in their roles. From the project, I developed a comprehensive understanding of sharing and respecting the opinions of other team members.

Reference List

Adams, A. Kayes, C. & Kolb, D. 2008. Experiential learning in teams. New York: Case Western Reserve University.

Burke, S. & Orlick, T. Mental strategies of elite Mount Everest climbers. Journal of Excellence. Vol. 3, Issue 8, pp. 42-67. Ottawa: Ottawa University.

Clayton, M. & Hailstone, P., 2009. The management models pocketbook. Alresford: Management Pocketbooks.

Glenn, P., 2009. Teamwork 20 steps to success. New York: Human Resource Development Pr.

Hansen, R., 2006. Benefits of and problems with students teams: suggestions for improving team projects. Journal of Education for Business. Vol. 82, issue 1, pp. 11-19.

Heinrich, A., 2010. Mount Everest. New York: Marshall Cavendish Benchmark. Hernadez, S., 2002. Team learning in a marketing principles course: cooperative

structures that facilitate active learning and higher-level thinking. Journal of Marketing Education. Vol. 24, issue 1, pp. 73-85.

Forrester, W. & Tashchian, A., 2006. Modeling relationship between cohesion and performance in student workgroup. International Journal of Management. Vol. 23, issue 3, pp. 458-464.

Jenkins, S., 1999. The top of the world: climbing Mount Everest. Boston: Houghton Mifflin Co.

Kaifi, B. & Noori, S., 2007. Organizational behavior: a study on managers, employees and teams. Journal of Management Policy and practice. Vol. 12, issue 1. California: University of California.

Kandula, S., 2007. Human resource management in practice: With 300 models techniques and tools. New Delhi: Prentice-Hall of India.

Kavita, S., 2010. Organizational behavior: text and cases. Chandigarh: Upper Saddle River.

Levi, D., 2011. Group dynamics for teams. Los Angeles: Sage.

Michaelsen, L., Bauman, K. A. & Fink, L., 2004. Team-based learning: A transformative use of small groups in college teaching. Sterling, VA: Stylus Publishing.

Nath, D., 2008. Building trust and cohesiveness in a leadership team: A practitioners perspective. Reflection. Vol. 9, issue 1, pp. 24-36.

Northouse, G., 2010. Leadership: theory and practice. Thousand Oaks: Sage Publications.

Sarmiento, J. W. & Stahl, G., 2008. Group creativity in interaction: Collaborative referencing, remembering, and bridging. International Journal of Human-Computer Interaction. Vol. 24, issue no. 5, pp. 492-504.

Select Knowledge. 2007. Managing teams. New York: Select Knowledge.

Sundstrom, E., 1999. Supporting work team effectiveness. San Francisco: Jossey-Bass.

Sullivan, P., 1998. Profiting from intellectual capital: extracting value from innovation. New York: John Wiley.

Williams, S. K., & Anderson, J. S., 2008. Teams lab: Promoting effective teamwork in operations management classes. Decision Sciences Journal of Innovative Education. Vol. 6. Issue no. 1, pp. 159-166.

Introduction

Thinking traps are often encountered whenever an important decision needs to be made. It could be a life-altering choice for education, expensive purchase of property, relationship decision, or any other high-impact choice. There are a number of such traps that can be encountered and each one can be capable of swaying a persons opinion. However, being aware of them could prevent poor and uninformed decisions from being committed. Recently, I had to be a guiding voice in a decision to purchase a new car for my relatives. They were intimidated by the variety of choices and had very specific needs and budget allowances. In this paper, I will reflect on the thinking traps I encountered and for the most part was able to avoid while making a decision on this matter.

The Situation

I have a very healthy relationship with my aunt and uncle. For years they consulted me on the matters of purchasing expensive pieces of equipment and appliances. A few months ago, they asked me to help with choosing a new car. Their old one is currently beyond repair. The market is currently filled with a wide range of cars that would be appropriate for their use, but the differences between manufacturers and optional versions of models are very confusing to them. They are not rich and often cannot replace an item if it does not have a warranty, so it is really important for them to make sure that everything they buy is reliable. They also often go camping which makes cargo compartments a priority. Gas mileage, warranty types, and length, as well as the previously mentioned elements, had to be considered for this decision.

All or Nothing Thinking

During my first examination of the market, I was not fully prepared for this task, and now that I reflect on my initial search, I understand which thinking traps I let myself fall into. The first one was all or nothing thinking. When filtering through the available options, I was preoccupied with making sure that the car met all the requirements set by the relatives of the highest possible quality. Unfortunately, this thinking did not result in a viable option, so I was forced to reconsider my choices. This trap may often affect people when judging other people or actions, but it may be encountered even when making purchasing decisions (Chittenden & Anthony, 2013).

Over-Generalization

Another trap that initially affected my reasoning is over-generalization. Three years ago, I had a serious issue while riding in a Toyota vehicle. A tire blew while my friend was driving and the car swerved onto the side of the road. Nobody was hurt during the event, but my opinion of the manufacturer became very low. I over-generalized by thinking of all Toyota vehicles as dangerous and unreliable, despite the fact they do not have lower reliability than those of other brands. I decided to read the information on their reliability to gain a better idea of the situation after seeing generally positive reviews of the cars they produce (Schoenleber & Gratz, 2018).

Jumping to Conclusions

This might be slightly embarrassing, but when choosing a car for my relatives, I assume that it would need to have the same or similar color as their old vehicle. I meticulously searched through the online catalogs for similar colors and even excluded some perspective options of cars that did not allow for the same shade of blue as their original vehicle was. I never fully prevented this issue from affecting my decision because after assuming, I did not think about it a second time. To my surprise, they were not concerned with the color of the car and even preferred to be different for the sake of novelty. I believe that this type of assumption can be extremely dangerous in situations that concern peoples wellbeing (Laptook, 2015).

Exaggeration and Magnification

Before I started my search, my uncle made sure to emphasize the importance of cargo space inside the car and how often they plan to use it for camping. This conversation forced me to believe that it is a need of the highest priority for them. In some portions of the search, I began to lean more towards choices that had large trunks but were not as reliable as others. During our next contact, I made sure to ask him if this approach was correct and he said that I should prioritize reliability instead while keeping cargo space the second place in the list of priorities. Such misunderstandings can lead to much larger issues in the future, as more important problems can be overshadowed by less important ones (Kerns, Roux, Connell, & Shattuck, 2016).

Minimization

This thinking trap was directly tied to the previous one during my decision-making. As I stated earlier, I began to overlook issues in cars such as lower reliability, insufficient warranty coverage, as well as other problems when the car had a lot of cargo space. This issue was solved during the same conversation with my uncle as he pointed out the importance of reliability over other factors (Tidball, 2016).

Emotional Reasoning

When I was younger, my family had a comfortable Ford family vehicle. While I was not fully aware of the manufacturer or why cars may be good or bad, I still developed an emotional connection to the Ford brand of vehicles. This led me to initially prioritize Ford cars over others with no evidence of them being more reliable than other brands. Such thinking is extremely common when dealing with topics that are tied to good or bad memories. However, this trap can lead to negative outcomes despite the emotional connection (Tidball, 2016).

Confirmation Bias

Continuing from the previous trap, when looking at the reviews and statistics of the Ford vehicles, I often considered any negative feedback as a magnification of issues on the part of the reviewer or misleading information. In my memories, Ford vehicles never broke down in the middle of a trip and were the most comfortable out of all others. This was not true. Memories often present a false reality based on emotions experienced at that time, rather than a clear fact. Eventually, I had to admit that there was no benefit to what I was doing and I widened my horizons of the matter of car brands (Tidball, 2016).

Conclusion

I experienced the majority of common thinking traps when choosing a car for my relatives. It was a very important purchase for them, and I wanted to make sure that it would last them for decades with minimal issues. By the end, I managed to avoid almost all the traps after thinking about what I was doing and consulting with the relatives. My choice was beneficial to them, and they still use the car with no issues. By reflecting on this matter right now, I gained a better understanding of the issues I had during the selection process, and I will try to avoid them in the future.

References

Chittenden, D., & Anthony, P. (2013). A cognitive behavioural approach to working with parents and families. Community Practitioner; London, 86(12), 3134.

Kerns, C. M., Roux, A. M., Connell, J. E., & Shattuck, P. T. (2016). Adapting cognitive behavioral techniques to address anxiety and depression in cognitively able emerging adults on the autism spectrum. Cognitive and Behavioral Practice, 23(3), 329340.

Laptook, R. (2015). Managing childhood problems. The Brown University Child and Adolescent Behavior Letter, 31(3), 16.

Schoenleber, M., & Gratz, K. L. (2018). Self-acceptance group therapy: A transdiagnostic, cognitive-behavioral treatment for shame. Cognitive and Behavioral Practice, 25(1), 7586.

Tidball, K. G. (2016). Traps in and of our minds: relationships between human logic, dialectical traps and social-ecological traps. Sustainability Science; Dordrecht, 11(6), 867876.

Individual Questions

Although defining ones life purpose is a task that cannot always be clearly defined (otherwise, things would be much simpler), I think I have found a general definition that I am willing to commit to. My life purpose is to ensure constant growth in various aspects of my personality. In everything I do, I would like to ask myself, How does this contribute to my development? There are multiple ways in which a person can grow, so I am not talking about some particular actions but rather an attitude. I want to make sure that, with every endeavor, I make a contribution to my intellectual, mental, emotional, spiritual, or physical development, thus becoming smarter, stronger, more enduring, more fulfilled, more satisfied, and more understanding. Therefore, I do not want to engage in activities that I know will not make me better in any way but will be a waste of time oreven worsewill deteriorate my characteristics. I find this life purpose worth trying to stick to because what I want to achieve is to become the best version of who I am over the years of my personal and professional life in the future.

As any person engaging in interaction, I have faced conflicts, and the ones that I particularly recall every time are the conflicts between me and other people involved in a common project where we had to spend a lot of time together and come up with a lot of solutions really fast. The work was rather tense, and what I felt was that I thought I knew how everything needed to be done, so I was spending a lot of time trying to convince my teammates that I was right. We did not understand each other, and the atmosphere was rather nervous, as one of my teammates and I even yelled at each other at some point. After the end of the project, upon reflecting on my behavior, I realized that I really lacked the willingness to listen to other peoples points. It is not how I normally behave, but back then, decisions needed to be made quickly, so the pressure made me less flexible than I actually want to be. In fairness, my colleagues demonstrated a lack of patience and cooperation skills, too. I define those conflicts as conflicts of authoritarian nature: under pressure, we wanted to control things rather than to cooperate, and the way to resolve those conflicts is to adopt a more cooperative attitude.

Upon analyzing my personality, I have discovered that my biggest strength is compassion manifested in striving for understanding people. I highly appreciate this trait because I think it is very beneficialnot only in my personal life, as some may think, i.e. for building stronger personal relationships, but also in my profession. Successful performance largely depends on the ability to understand other people because, whatever one does, he or she almost inevitably deals with people, and the unwillingness or inability to understand what people you deal with want is a major barrier to being success. My major weakness is being committed to ideals, which is manifested in a lowered ability to compromise, tolerate failures in other peoples works, cooperate (because I tend to think I know what is better), and also cope with criticism. This weakness of mine is somewhat contradictory to my strength described above, but I do not think it is so uncommon for a person to have contradictory characteristics. Now that I understand this contradiction, I think I am more prepared to be working toward enhancing my strengths and applying them wisely while at the same time working on my weaknesses and trying to become more flexible.

This understanding of my strengths and weaknesses comes from my Types Test results. As a Harmony type, I have the feeling of balancing and looking for perfect proportions, which is why I am likely to be willing to listen to different people and try to reconcile their opinions and positions. However, being an Idealistic type at the same time, I may be the opposite of a Harmony type in a sense, since Idealistic types are often inflexible and not open enough to what other people have to say. I think being dedicated to perfect examples is important, but it should be alleviated if it prevents a person from successfully cooperating with other people, which is why I am glad I have discovered this contradiction in myself and reflected on it.

Reflecting on the Exercise

I think that this exercise is useful in terms of summarizing once again the characteristics of my personality I have discovered through recalling particular examples, such as conflicts I faced, and trying to address big questions, such as the question of the purpose of life. What makes this exercise good for team building is that people who will need to work together get to share and each expresses his or her experiences and attitudes on the same subjects, which is a large contribution to the mutual understanding. Not only people get to talk openly about issues that are relevant to their common work, but they can also identify problems that they have already faced or are likely to face, which will help avoid conflicts and increase cooperation in the future. This provides a common context in which future conflicts can be more successfully resolved. In other words, team members understand what words to use and what to refer to when addressing conflicts that may occur among them.

It was quite comfortable for me to reveal myself to the team because I knew that everyone was involved in the mutual self-disclosure, so everyone would get to reveal things about him or her. It was somewhat challenging to talk about conflicts and weaknesses, which is only natural I think, but I was not unwilling to do so because I understood the purpose of the exercise. A lesson that I learned was that leadership was much more connected to understanding people that one leads than it is usually thought.

Concerning changes in my life, I think I will try to become more disciplined by adopting more definitive scheduling and planning practices. I understand that it will require commitment and will possibly change my everyday habits, but I am up for the challenge. I think the exercise can be improved by creating an atmosphere where people are even less inhibited and more willing to talk about relevant issues. I think it can be done by extending the number of subjects that can be discussed and including those that the members of the team are likely to talk about in an informal way. I think the exercise has helped me in a recent conflict where I demonstrated a lack of patience: I decided to take more time to explain what I wanted and how I proposed to get it done, which allowed the reduction of tension because, previously in the conflict, I was acting rather inflexibly.

The socio-cultural norms define how we need to behave in various social settings. We learn most of these tacit rules while growing up. The cultural values, religious expectations, and social practices define our etiquette, especially in social gatherings. Some of these norms are so entrenched that when one fails to observe them, he or she may be considered mentally abnormal. I had an experience in the elevator that made me learn a lot about the consequences of breaking some of these tacit rules. It happened when I visited a local restaurant and had to use an elevator.

The Expected Behavior

When in an elevator, one is expected to be calm. When one is in the midst of strangers, it is normal to say hi and ask for assistance when it is needed. One should avoid being pushy in the elevator and any erratic behavior that may agitate others within the elevator should be avoided as much as possible. When getting out of the elevator, one should allow those who are nearest to the door to leave first.

What I Did that Did Not Conform To Expected Behavior?

On this day, I got into the elevator and started singing and dancing. I found three ladies and a gentleman in the elevator. I did not utter a single word to any of them, but kept singing, dancing, and smiling at them. Just before leaving, I shook hands with all of them and rushed out.

How People around Me Reacted?

The people around me were visibly shocked and amused by my actions. They looked at me inquisitively and made deliberate efforts to avoid being close to me. It was evident that they were not certain about my state of mind. One specific girl went as far as hiding behind the gentleman, only stealing glimpses at me and smiling when she was sure I was looking the other way. I noticed that they were in relief when I finally left. While in the restaurant, I noticed that two ladies who were with me in the elevator deliberately avoided sitting anywhere near me. The avoided making eye contact with me but they ensured that they monitored my movements.

My Own Reaction

I knew I was acting in an abnormal way, and I personally felt amused. I smiled as a read fear in the eyes of some of the people who were with me in the elevator. I felt sorry for the young woman who felt threatened but at the time amused by my acts. I tried to remain calm during the entire time.

What I Have Learned?

The incident in the elevator made me learn a lot about how cultural rules work and why we should follow them. In most of the cases, these rules are not made in writing. They are expected to be part of us based on our upbringing and the social environment in which we live. These rules are meant to ensure that there is order in the society. They define our etiquette, especially how we need to relate with others. When one fails to follow these basic rules, people tend to develop a feeling that he or she is mentally abnormal. In many cases, people may not stop one from breaking these simple tacit rules, especially if they do not feel their social sphere is threatened. However, they take note of such behavior and tend to avoid such people as much as possible. Normal behavior earns people respect, but that cannot be the case if one drifts away from the socio-cultural expectations. The decision of the two ladies to avoid me indicates that they were convinced I was mentally retarded. Although I behaved in a normal way once I entered the restaurant, the memory of my actions in the elevator made them develop a negative perception towards me. While others who had not seen me in the elevator appeared comfortable sitting near me, the two were worried about my presence. I realized that the first impression that one creates may lasts.

Which of four personal stories captured for the radio program This American Life is your favourite?

The program I have enjoyed most of all is about the listeners sharing their stories (477: Getting Away with It). It represents the stories shared by the people who had phoned the program of Ira Glass. It proves that nearly anyone in hos or her life did something bad. It could be cheating at school or telling lies, but over one thousand of the listeners who phoned the special number of the program reported they did not always act decently. A lot of stories were connected with school or college. Students are very inventive when they need something. Thus, boys in one class learned Morse Code and used it to cheat during teats just tapping the answers.

Other people played jokes on the surrounding individuals or broke some rules. On the whole, I like these stories because people were not scared to reveal their secrets to the audience. Certainly, the phone calls were anonymous. However, the disclosure of personal stories that were kept to themselves for year demands courage. This program proved that the people are not as decent as they pretend. Almost everyone has at least a small dark secret he or she is ashamed of despite getting away with it.

Personal story of getting away with it

I used to be a nice child and cannot remember something really bad. However, I used to mistreat my younger brother and a cousin. They are four and six years younger than me and my friends. No wonder that we did not want to play together. Thus, when they came to us and wanted to play together we would suggest playing hide-and-seek and hide somewhere where they could not get us, at the attic for example. At that time, I had no problems with getting away with it. I was sure we did not do anything bad. Now I am a bit ashamed of behaving like that. However, the childhood experience is forgotten and we are good friends now. We can remember our past experiences and laugh together.

How does this experience of listening to radio stories differ from watching TV shows about the same content?

Listening to various kinds of material is very popular. The research revealed that as of 2014 64 percent of American young people from 12 to 24-year-olds and 37 percent of adults from 25 to 54-year-olds listen to the radio online during the week (Wen par.3). About a third of people admitted listening to a podcast at least once. Listening is more convenient than watching since one does not need to sit somewhere. Listening on the go is the thing that most of the people do. In the rush that the majority of people live listening is a perfect way to learn something interesting or to get information. Emma Rodero (qtd. in Wen par.11) provided a research on the influence of audio material on peoples attention.

The study revealed that a dramatized audio structure, using voice actors who tell the story exclusively through dialogue, stimulate listeners imagination more than a typical voice of God narration (Wen Par. 11). The participants of the experiment admitted that they had brighter images in their minds when they listened to a dramatized story. Besides, such stories kept the listeners more interested and exited. Finally, during listening the attention is concentrated on the voices and on the content, while the watching may distract attention of the viewer from the essence of the story with constantly changing picture.

Works Cited

477: Getting Away with It. This American Life. 2012. Web.

Wen, Tiffany. Inside the Podcast Brain: Why Do Audio Stories Captivate? The Atlantic. 2015. Web.

Introduction

Animals have always been a reflection of humanitys ancient past. Here I stood watching and wondering how the persons best friend, a dog, could originate from this wild and ferocious beast that is a wolf. I was not much of an admirer of the animal kingdom. However, these predators had something special about them. Wolves resembled our friendly and playful pets, but they posed a danger. Their strength and confidence have always been their peculiarities, and their smaller size compared to some with other animals has never been their weakness. Wolves live in packs, and their habits help them to overcome larger predators. Joint actions give them an opportunity to transcend opponents and defeat them. Therefore, even larger predators do not dare to fight with wolves.

Main body

Firstly, the wolf has always been used as a symbol of freedom and fearlessness. These animals inhabit large territories, where they live and hunt. Unlike bears, they are not the biggest predators in the ecosystem; however, wolves are positioned at the top of the food chain. The most popular prey is an American bison, which vastly outweighs the wolf. Nevertheless, these predators are fearless and chase bison regardless of their size. It would be the same if lions hunted elephants, which is a rare occurrence. Therefore, by occupying vast lands and hunting the largest local herbivores, the wolf demonstrates courage and freedom.

Secondly, the wolf is an example of intelligence throughout the fauna. These animals organize a clear structure of relationships in packs and never violate this order. They have leaders who can regulate their lifestyle and priority rights. Also, young wolves support old species who cannot hunt on their own. These principles indicate that their interaction system is advanced and orderly. Unlike many other predators, wolves do not abandon the members of their packs and protect the weak in case of danger. Therefore, their dedication and collectivism are examples in the animal world.

Lastly, the wolf is a predatory animal that is similar to a dog, but at the same time having a mind of a rather sly fox. This animal can show cruelty, rage, deceit, evil, as well as military valor, courage, and victory. Often, the wolf is attributed to the duality of characters. It can be good or evil, and this remark is found in almost all nations. These ideas may be due to the fact that the wolf and the dog are related, and the dark side of this beast is a wolf, and the light side is inherited from the dog. This animal possesses large territories and defends it from an outsider. That is why the wolf is a symbol of freedom and fearlessness.

Conclusion

In conclusion, it is important to state that the wolf is a multifaceted symbol that is associated with the forces of good and light and can assist and be a protector. However, in turn, it is related to dark forces; it can be evil, cruel, and greedy. Nonetheless, the wolf will be what it seems to a person and how he or she will perceive it. It is an animal of honor and courage, which can also be cruel and fierce. It is essential to understand that there are many similarities between a wolf and a person because both of them can demonstrate and possess either good or bad qualities.

Introduction

The complicated nature of life explains why grieving is a necessary process. The loss of a beloved person can trigger numerous emotions such as guilt, anger, disbelief, and sadness. Coping with sudden death can result in a major challenge. It is agreeable that most of these reactions and emotional responses to loss are natural. That being the case, people should help one another throughout the mourning process in order to find new meaning and move on with life. Those who are in emotional pain should also be allowed to cry in order to support the healing process. The death of my favorite aunt affected me significantly. After the event, it took me five days to accept the fact that my aunt was gone. The purpose of this paper, therefore, is to give a personal experience of loss, grief, and mourning following my aunts untimely demise.

Discussion

The most memorable loss occurred when I was 21 years of age. This was after the death of my maternal aunt. She was only 10 years older. Her untimely death occurred when I was in the United States. Our age gap explains why we used to be close to one another. We could do many things together and support each other. She was shot four times while in Colombia and died instantly.

Although it was hard to explain the circumstances that led to her death, forensic investigations revealed that she had been murdered by robbers for an unknown reason. The victim was a mother-figure to me. As an aunt, she guided, empowered, and encouraged me to pursue most of my dreams. This analysis shows that I was emotionally close to her.

After the loss, I experienced numerous emotional, spiritual, and psychological challenges. Such feelings occurred for several weeks after my aunts death. Several reasons can be presented to support this argument. The first one is that I was unable to pursue my goals. This development made it hard for me to meet the needs of my underage daughter. The second example is that I become stressed and troubled. This emotional response occurred after I received the news of her death. The third example is that I was unable to interact with other people. This means that my social competencies were affected greatly. After the death, it took me five days to accept the fact that she was gone. Throughout this period, I could dial her cell-phone number to confirm that she was not with us anymore. This was the case because I felt stressed and discontented with everything in life. The pain in my body was also unbearable.

I was unable to focus on my spiritual goals and mental status. However, I managed to cope with the loss after several months due to the support received from different family members. For instance, my husband was helpful throughout this troubling period. It should also be observed that my failure to attend her funeral might have affected my healing process. This is the reason why individuals who have lost their beloved ones should be advised, guided, and supported accordingly.

My mourning process affected the people around me in a number of ways. For instance, I was not able to support or raise up my young daughter. I was also unable to interact freely with my husband and relatives. I also found it hard to interact with my colleagues, relatives, and friends. The good news was that most of my family members were helpful during this emotional period. This was the case because they empowered me to deal with my grief and be in a position to pursue my aims. They were also keen to console and encourage me to remain strong. It is also worth noting that none of the persons around me was hurtful during the time.

The major rituals considered during the time of loss were prayers and fasting. These practices are known to support the mourning process (Burke & Neimeyer, 2014). I also began to smoke as a way of getting rid of stress. I used different links to feel connected to the deceased person. For instance, my grandmother managed to send my aunts graduation ring to me. I always wear the ring as a grim reminder of my beloved aunt. I also possess the clothes she was wearing at the time of the murder. I have never washed them and they are bloodstains.

Holdsworth (2015) asserts that human beings use various techniques to manage their lamentation processes. The first technique that can be used to describe my mourning process is that of writing (Eyetsemitan, 2017). It is evident that my aunt had written a letter to me. Due to the nature of her death, I had not responded to her letter. This is something that has been haunting me over the years. I also have many things in my heart that I was never given the opportunity to say to my aunt. For instance, I did not tell her how she was loved and missed. I have many photographs that remind me of our experiences together.

I strongly believed that a number of rituals can still help with the loss today. For instance, I would be happy to be given a chance to visit her grave. I would mourn and pray on her grave in order to complete my mourning process. Personally, I think that the intensity of my loss could not be sensationalized by the media. This is the reason why I decided to engage in smoking. These aspects show conclusively that my mourning process was complicated (Burke & Neimeyer, 2014). This argument can be supported by the fact that it is several years after the loss and I am yet to heal completely. I also experienced intense rumination, pain, and sorrow during the period. The decision to hold on to her belongings also explains why the process was complicated.

It is agreeable that this loss occurred at a time when I was not aware of the nature of suffering (Hordan & Litz, 2014). With more knowledge, I would have kept myself busy, interacted with more people, and read different materials to support the mourning process. I would have also attended her funeral in order to stop feeling guilty.

There are various complicated mourning issues that have kept me stuck in my mourning process. The first one is that it has taken me many years to be in a position to talk about my aunt. It has been hard for me to accept the fact that she is no longer around us. The second issue is that minor events or memories can trigger intense or painful reactions (Worden, 2008). Sometimes I can start to cry after remembering her.

This course has made it easier for me to learn a number of things about myself. The first observation is that the loss of a close relative or friend can affect me negatively. Such an occurrence can make it hard for me to achieve my goals or interact with others. The second lesson is that I can address most of my emotional and psychological challenges. This is the case because I managed to deal with this loss successfully. It is also clear that I have gained numerous ideas and concepts about mourning from this course. For instance, I have known that individuals should be guided and empowered throughout the period (Eyetsemitan, 2017). People should also be allowed to cry and mourn throughout their lamentation periods.

Conclusion

My discussion shows clearly that my aunt was like a sister to me and a big confidant who supported everything I was doing. This means that she was always close to me. Since she was young, we used to share ideas and live like sisters. Despite these feelings of pain and anguish, it should be observed that the mourning process empowered me to develop better concepts that can be used to support others. The ideas gained from this course can also meet the needs of persons who have lost their friends or relatives. My experience after the loss of my aunt echoes most of the challenges faced by many mourning persons. It is, therefore, necessary for those who are in grief to keep themselves busy and interact with others to prevent any suicidal thoughts. Mourners should also never be avoided. Consequently, these lessons will empower me to guide others in the future.

References

Burke, L. A., & Neimeyer, R. A. (2014). Spiritual distress in bereavement: Evolution of a research program. Religions, 5, 1087-1115. Web.

Eyetsemitan, F. (2017). Employee grief, workplace culture, and implications for worker productivity and psychopathology. Acta Psychopathologica, 3(4), 1-3. Web.

Holdsworth, M. (2015). Bereaved carers accounts of the end of life and the role of care providers in a good death: A qualitative study. Palliative Medicine, 29(9), 834-841.

Hordan, A. H., & Litz, B. T. (2014). Prolonged grief disorder: Diagnostic, assessment, and treatment considerations. Professional Psychology: Research and Practice, 45(3), 180-187. Web.

Worden, J. W. (2008). Grief counseling and grief therapy: A handbook for the mental health practitioner (4th ed.). New York, NY: Springer Publishing.