Category: Family Relationships

The impacts of technology are more visible in families. Although, it truly has a long list of advantages; However, there are drawbacks to incorporating technology into households. Almost every family owns a smartphone, computer, and laptop, which means technology dominates almost every family. Because of that, the traditional way of parenting has become rare nowadays and it lessens the value of parenting. Below are the negative effects of technology, specifically the use of computers and the Internet among family relationships.

Firstly, the usage of technology reduces the family bonding. As the members of the family start to use their digital devices religiously, the attention for each other was now limited. It can result in many problems like lack of communication and resulted in conflicts or fights between family members. One study found that when the working parent arrived home after work, his or her children were so immersed in technology that the parent was greeted only 30 percent of the time and was totally ignored 50 percent of the time. For me the foundation of every family is not wealth, shelter or any material things, the foundation of the family is communication and bonding. How family members can understand each other if they don’t talk to each other, how can they help each other if they don’t understand each other? To have a good and strong family relationship they must communicate and bond as well. Sadly, lack of communication and bonding occurs in my own family, gadgets get our attention most of the time. Even at the dinner table, instead of sharing what happened in our day we choose to browse on our phone. And one thing that makes me sad that our digital devices give us more entertainment or happiness than bond with our own family. They say when you love someone, you’ll give your attention to them, but I’ve noticed in our generation our love for our family decreased its value because of the technology that divides our attention.

Another rising issue, the parents are having a hard time in monitoring their own children, despite the fact that most parents see their children every single day. They cannot fully observe what their kids are browsing on the internet since they are busy providing wants and needs for their families. Computer and mobile devices offer children independence in communicating with their friends or other people. In previous generations, usually most households, they only have telephone serving as their communication devices, so if children want to contact their friend, they will use their home phone which might be answered by the parents. In this way, parents before modern technology can monitor the person that wants to talk to their children. Unlike today, times have drastically changed, most children in our generation, especially the teenager and pre-teenagers, seek this opportunity to have freedom from the involvement of their parents. Now besides communication, the internet contains everything, and you can find anything on it from child stuff to adult kinds of stuff. Inevitably, children will be carried to the adult stuff side of the internet, which is a scary thing for parents.

One more factor that contributes to the negative impact of the internet in households, the kids are being indulged in the media and all the bad information that can get on the internet, can go against the authority of their parents. My third point is subsequent if parents didn’t monitor well their children this issue or problem will bound to happen. Morally speaking, every kid should honor their parents all the days of their life, no matter how old or how young their parents are. By honoring our parents, the bible ensures that we can live longer, and it is the first commandment that has promise. Now that children are not monitored well by their parents, they start degrading the value of the authority of their parents. By transgressing the rules of their parents and answering them in a non-respectful way. Inside every social media, there is always a kid or teenager who disrespects her/his parents that post something against his/her parents and some people agree, in that way the culture of degrading the parents starts to spread. There are many problems to address when it come to this matter, but I would like to focus more on the problems that the video games cause. Digital games itself are not bad the people’s attitude about it is the one that is bad. Since this has become the escape tool of teenagers from the realities of life. It gives them satisfaction and happiness that they think they cannot obtain from their parents. Inside most of the online video games contain violence, drugs, and sex that is not applicable to the children below 18, but according to Statista, which is a statistic site, 21% of the video game player comes from those below 18 by 2019. Indulging in video games can affect not only their physical health but also mental health, perspective and the way the children communicate with their parents. I’ll take the boy that I’ve watched form Dr. Phil, which is a talk show that discusses life strategies, as an example. This 12-year old boy plays video games whenever he wants and talks to his mother in a very disrespectful way and her mother is in a lot of pain because of that.

Not only the parent and children relationship but also the spousal relationship is affected by the use of the internet and digital devices. According to the Pew Research Center, 25 percent of cell owners in serious relationships say the phone distracts their spouse or partner when they are alone together. Bonding between the couple was not limited. Not only the children are being indulged with their phones, their parents too. The increase in cheating in the relationship was significantly increased according to some studies due to the modern technology we have today. Affairs used to be limited to sexual interaction, but today we have a new range of so-called micro-cheating propagated online. Cheating comes in different sizes, liking other girls/boys’ picture or post is considered cheating for some people, and it definitely causes conflict on most couples. Maintaining an online dating profile, flirtatious comments, sexting with someone else, or even intimate online friendship are also considerably cheating. ‘In the past, affairs were defined by the physical. But with the internet, we’ve come to accept emotional affairs as part of infidelity. It includes everything’s that’s sort of on the fringes of cheating,’ said Katherine Hertlein

The risk of infidelity among spousal relationships is now multiplied and the main thing that is affected by this is none other than, the children. They’re the one who suffers the most when one parent is involved in cheating, it can cause depression, distraction in their studies, emotional and physical instability.

Now let us proceed to issue where the family is becoming addicted and dependent on the internet. Internet addiction appears as a serious public health issue due to its immediate relationship with social functioning problems, adolescent health problems and risk behavior stated by a study from the Department of Applied Social Science in Hong Kong. Technology is addictive by design. Phone apps are religiously sending notification indicating users to spend more time on it. New technology makes our lives easier than past times where people need to work hard to acquire things. A study reported that when teens reach 18, they’re apparently spending upwards of 85 hours a month on their smartphones. Internet addiction is related to problems like lack of communication, unproductive life, and mental health problems. A recent BBC article ‘I wish my mom’s phone was never invented’ presented a Louisana class where children were asked about an invention that they did not like. 4 out of 21 students said mobile phone. One wrote “If I had to tell you what invention I don’t like, I would say that I don’t like the phone. I don’t like the phone because my parents are using their phones every day. A phone is sometimes a really bad habit. I hate my mom’s phone and I wish she never had one. That is an invention that I don’t like”. The internet and digital devices were now more of a need today. Every company requires an email as a pre-requisite to a job, University/college professors use an app or email to teach and send a lesson to their students. Including the internet in the household itself is not a bad thing but the problem occurs when the members of the family are relying too much on the internet, engaging themselves too much on the fantasy or expectation and not realizing how hard the reality of life. Children will grow up more likely by being weak and incompetent if he/she becomes internet dependent.

To conclude, technology is flourishing by leaps and bounds. It is hard to cancel out technology in our life because it is everywhere to some extent it is required on some agenda on family lives. But the drawbacks of incorporating technology in the family can destroy their bonding together. Controlling kids becomes a controversial issue today and the authority of parents is now questioned because of the use of social media. The spousal relationship was now jeopardized. And finally, the most obvious disadvantage of technology among family relationships is Internet addiction that causes many serious problems. Parenting before modern technology was hard enough but now that we have many technological resources that result in various issues parenting was become even harder.

In Joan London’s The Golden Age, the role of family is reflected distinctly, and also, bittersweet for characters in different age levels. Family is the back supporter for children suffering from polio in the Golden Age as well as the parents express their unconditional devotion. Nevertheless, family relationships in The Golden Age are not always harmonious, as the lack of understanding remotes some of the family members and even makes the relationship fraught. Yet, in broader terms, the theme of family, is complicated.

For pre-adolescent characters like Frank or pathetic one like Ida, they gain support from family economically and spiritually. London depicts a dire condition of not only Holocaust during World War II but also polio pandemics, which love between characters is thus emphasised. Frank, especially, who describes his family as a ‘loud, raw tragicomedy’ without realising Ida bears the burden of a tough job to sustain his life in the Golden Age. Moreover, Ida safeguards Frank, which allow him manage to survive throughout the war. In contrast to Ida, Meyer supports Frank and the whole family emotionally, he constantly visits Frank to assist him to go through the trauma, and in obvious, the discussions between this father and son is much broader the one with Ida. Also, Meyer shows his care for Ida since she feels ‘gutted, feeble, shell-shocked’ after transferring to a new environment, he persuades Ida to regain the confidence found in playing piano. Meyer always exhibits a more personable and relaxed image to ease up the vibe in family but the loneliness and homesickness is never eradicated. The love and contribution between family is selfless even sometimes they have to sacrifice.

Further, characters who are more mature devote to their family. In contrast to Frank who is sometimes rebellious, characters who have their life experience increased, focus more on family relationships and display profound love on their children. During Holocaust, rather than being a traditional mother, Ida is more pragmatic which is because she has the faith of saving the whole family. In her search for ‘fighting core of survival’, and the use of ‘self-love’ to describe her family, the intense devotion to her family is reflected, unlike the conventional feminine mothers, the belief in saving family boosts and reveals the belligerent and wise side of her. Similarly, Margaret as a mother characterised by a fierce love with Elsa, who overbears other mean family members. However, Margaret is like a ‘mother animal’ who ‘grow[s] up with’ Elsa, she never compromises on the issue when it comes to Elsa, Margaret facilitates the reunion of Frank and Elsa which is likely against the willing of Jack and rebuts at Nance who is arrogant that polio will not limit Elsa’s prospects. Family also means the object of devotion for numerous characters.

Additionally, in spite of love among them, family can be a burden at times. ‘Growing up’ in The Golden Age leads adolescents to be rebellious or further distances between generations, and family relationships can be limitations. Confronting with Ida’s appearance as a flustered and anxious mother, Frank displays exhaustion while getting along with her, as well as, he ‘refuses to be [his parents’] only light’ when facing their over expectations, family somehow blocks the way that Frank pursues his freedom. Besides, Sister Penny as a different position in family, overtakes similar pressure. Though her love towards Elizabeth Ann is also profound, she sees Ann as her ‘number one’, her desire for freedom and human connections enhances their sense of distance. While Elizabeth Ann pursues a conventional life that she is unable to offer and in her marriage, she is ‘swallowed up into what she’s always wanted – a big, respectable family.’ The distance between mother and daughter depresses Sister Penny. Family relationships can sometimes intensify one’s stress.

In the Golden Age, war and polio do great impacts on families, which the bond between family is tightened, and profound love and devotion is evidently displayed. However, inevitably, family normally faces with conflicts, while the lack of mutual understanding also alienates family members. The role of family in The Golden Age is that this provides not only love and care to support one’s life but also becomes part of pressure.

German supermarket chain, Edeka released a Christmas-themed advertisement back in 2015, starring elderly a father who resorts to a dramatic extent to bring his children together for Christmas. The ad opens on him receiving several voicemails from his kids saying they can’t come home for Christmas, and as the time-lapse edit continues he realizes that he is not the only one that spends it alone. This commercial moved people around the world saying “This is the most heartbreaking commercial ever”. This ad also made headlines on newspapers, blogs, and TV programs in Germany starting a debate across the country on “what is the importance of family?”

If we look at the definition of family, it says it is the people you share genetic material with the ones who are related to you by blood. This relationship starts with your immediate family, then moves onto your extended family. This dead set definition doesn’t cover every single form of family for example marriage and adoption, which are ways on how to ingress into a family without sharing blood. Our family is the first introduction and interaction of the world that we experience. We learn the everything through them such as social communication and emotional needs, because the human species is a social being, which makes it impossible to live a unaccompanied life.

Family provides us with a feeling of protection. It acts as the barrier against the outside world that we need in order to learn on becoming a better person. In the basic sense, we are unable to fend for ourselves when we come into the reality of the world. Our family conveys the knowledge of these basic social interaction to us and these basic actions are called values. They determine not only just the interactions we get involved into but also the thinking that goes behind those interactions. It’s our family who takes care of raising us and providing the basic needs for us. As we grow older and the more we are exposed to the world our family becomes more available to us for emotional support.

Love is defined as an intense feeling of deep affection in another, love is the factor that comes to mind first, love is what is runs and keeps the family together. All people have the need to love and to be cherished and this all starts with initial love from family. We learn to love from our family. Through love we learn about affection, concealment, belonging, and compassion. However, we don’t just learn to love by ourselves and to love each other, each family member has to work on building and nurturing love for each other.

Loyalty is what others would say is the product of love. It is what makes a family build a strong bond during the most glorious days to the darkest of days. Which makes us defend one another, stand up for another’s unjust treatment. Family cheer each other on to victories and to suffer with each other in defeats. They support each other no matter what.

In the long run, strong relationships among family is crucial to retaining it. A family without desirable relationships fall apart in no time and in doing so it changes the family relation on an extraordinary level. In other words, powerful family relationships are the simple glue that holds society together.

As discussed above, the importance of family, is truly shown in this commercial. It truly shows how far they relationship has strayed away from one another. The commercial shows all the children who live around the world and living their own live and unable to come home to spend Christmas with their father. This is when the father takes the dramatic extent of faking his own death to bring together his children to spend together.

This German commercial brings light into everyone’s eyes. Conveying the message that family is the most important in one’s life, that work isn’t as important as family is to us in the world.

Family plays a very significant role in the life of an individual. Each author represents family and relationships in his/her own unique way as people see things from a different perspective. Some writers represent a loving, caring and supportive family in their literary works. However, some writers show the negative side of the family to the readers such as conflicts between parents and siblings. The way the three novels represent family and relationships is fascinating but sad and emotional at the same time. The family members are not together in many ways. There is love in the relationships and still there are many issues with the family. The contemporary families are perfect from the outside but disturbed from the inside. The central theme in all the three literary works is family and relationships.

We Need to Talk About Kevin is a famous novel written by Margaret Ann Shriver. This novel shows a very disturbed family. The relations between the family members are very complicated especially between mother and son. Throughout the story, the author focuses on Kevin’s relationship with his mother Eva. Both the mother and son hate each other but still Eva tries to be a good mother in some parts of the story. For instance, she reads a parenting book to be nice to her son and understand him. She says, “Before you condemn me utterly, I beg you to understand just how hard I’d been trying to be a good mother” (Shriver, 195). She is trying to show a mother’s love towards her son even though she hates him. Kevin, on the other hand, creates problems for his mother throughout the story. This also affected Eva’s relationship with her husband [Franklin]. She loves her husband more than her own son. Franklin, on the other hand always blames Eva for Kevin’s monstrous nature. He shows his superiority to Eva by saying that, “But I for one didn’t have a kid in order to get away from him as often as possible” (Shriver, 208). Franklin does not want to listen the truth from his wife even though he knows that it is the truth. There is love in their relationship but with a lack of understanding. Franklin is always nice to his son and has a good bonding with him.

Franklin always thinks of his family as a happy and perfect American family. The family looks perfect from the outside but, in reality, they are not together in many ways. The whole story revolves around the conflicts between mother and son, husband and wife, and brother and sister. Eva thinks of her family as a war zone as Kevin always tries to create problems for everyone. In contrast, Franklin lives far away from the reality and he believes there is nothing wrong with his family. Kevin is emotionless and he hates everyone in his family. When his sister [Celia] was born, the parents ask him to see her but Kevin says, “Why Should I meet it?” (Shriver, 221). He did not even consider her as a human being. Throughout the story, he shows no affection and love especially to his mother. But in the end, he kills everyone except his mother even though he hates her and he knows that she hates him too.

Maus 1 is a comic book by Art Spiegelman. The author describes his own life in this story. He also describes the problems that his family faced during the holocaust. Spiegelman shows a very supportive, loving and traditional family in his literary work. There is love of husband and wife, father-in-law and son-in-law, father and daughter, mother and daughter, and mother and son. Moreover, the family sticks together through all the hard times because of the love and understanding between the family members. For instance, Anja’s father [Mr. Spiegelman] always helps Vladek and his family especially during the holocaust. When Vladek’s factory is robbed, Mr. Spiegelman says, “Well, at least I can help you build it up again” (Spiegelman, 36). He is a wealthy man who always supports his family. The holocaust challenges the family several times but the love and bond between the family members becomes their strength and it helps them to survive the period of difficulties.

The novel mainly focuses on father’s relationship with his son and the way the holocaust affects their relationship. Vladek is a holocaust survivor and he want his son [Artie] to see the harsh reality of life. When Artie cries because his friends leave him and go for skating, he says, “Friends? Your friends? …if you lock them together in a room with no food for a week then you could see what it is, friends!” (Spiegelman, 5). He wants his son to be strong and independent. He wants him to face the cruel world and its reality alone.

On the one hand, Vladek’s relationship with his wife Anja is perfect and full of love. They both understand each other very well. There is compassion and intimacy in their relationship. Also, they are very kind towards each other. However, Vladek’s relationship with his second wife [Mala] is very disturbing as well as stubborn. One day, Artie visits his father for the interview and he thanks Mala for the delicious dinner but Vladek says, “The chicken was, I thought, too dry” (Spiegelman, 44). There is lack of love and understanding in their relationship. He thinks that Mala married him just for his money.

The Last Report on the Miracles at Little No Horse is a novel by Louise Erdrich. The main character in this novel is Agnes De Witt. She has no family except her lover Berndt Vogel. But he gets killed during a robbery, and after the death of her lover, she changes her identity into a priest [Father Damien]. Father Damien is a very lonely character in the story. He has no family so he devotes his whole life to his people. He serves them as a priest for more than a half century. The main focus of Erdrich’s novel is Father Damien’s relationship with other priests and nuns. Friends are often considered as a part of the family and this novel is more about friendship and humanity rather than the family relations. For instance, Nanapush is a stranger in the beginning but soon he becomes the closest friend of Father Damien. When Agnes misses him, she says, “The old man was my teacher, my confidant, my priest’s priest, my confessor, my friend” (Erdrich, 310). Agnes is very close to Nanapush and they remain best friends throughout the story.

However, there are some family relationships in the story too. There are mother and daughter relationships, for instance, Puyat mothers and daughters, Fleur and Lulu, and Leopolda and Marie. These relationships are very tense, deep and dark. There are many characters in the story that have lost their families. The story revolves around the memory of the past relationships of these characters. For instance, Nanapush’s family. Nanapush tells about the disturbing relationship with his mother to Lulu. He says, “especially my mother, because in the beginning my skin ached for my mother’s touch and my ears kept straining” (Erdrich, 248). He loves his mother in the beginning but later, he hates her. There are memories of relationships in the story and the past keeps on resurrecting.

Family is all about sacrifice and having faith in each other through the hard times as depicted in the three literary works. Family plays a significant role in the life of an individual. In these novels, the writers show both the positive and negative sides of the families. There are many issues with the family members despite the love and understanding between them. The families are not perfect in many ways and the relationships are complicated as well. The way the authors represent the contemporary families is very fascinating as the families look perfect from the outside but in reality, they are not. The mystery in the relationships and the families attract the attention of the readers in many ways.

The connection between two or even more people could be regarded as an interpersonal relationship, which includes different forms, there are colleagues relationships, partners relationships. There are many factors that influence relationships between people. .A child with parents forms family relationships, and men and women can form love or even marriage relationships (Juneja 2015). Additionally, people who do not have any relationship with others can not survive well in society., Many of them have social anxiety disorders, used to named as social phobia, which is a condition being afraid to create a relationship with others.According to statistics, “Lifetime prevalence rates of up to 12% have been reported and it has become the third most common psychiatric condition after major depression and alcohol dependence”.

Therefore, having good interpersonal relationships are quite significant, taking to consideration for personal health or career development. In the following research, there will be a discussion concerning factors that influence interpersonal relationships. These include , physical appearance, communication, time and compatibility. Firstly, people may consider physical appearance as a main criteria and factor to form successful relationships. Physical appearance could be regarded as the most influential factors that influences interpersonal relationships during the initial stage., However, most likely it will decrease its weight due to the presence of other factors. Cash & Fleming (2002) indicates that the poor social anxiety result has much concerned with the negative evaluation of physical appearance . A pleasant appearance can make a good impression on others.

Mr Viktor Sander did a psychological experiment, he asked students to estimate the likability of their classmates, and complete an analysis, the research shows that at the beginning of a typical semester, social status and physical appearance have more importance,however at the end of the semester, students highly rated those with personality and personal ability (Morin 2012). This means that physical appearance can make a first impression, which is an important step to have a new relationship, however, not the most influential factor at later stage. Additionally, communication is another factor that impacts people’s relationships. Everyone needs to communicate with others, in order to express their feelings and thoughts. There are direct and indirect communication, the direct usually can be more efficient than indirect communication, feedback can be received more easily. To be more specific, such as some electronic devices, like email or phones, they appeared as an indirect communication way, it may help people especially those social disorders overcome the communication barrier in a way. Anyway, any forms of communication, does impact relationships between people, it is necessary for everyone to properly master a communication skill.

Furthermore, time plays an important place in forming and maintaining relationships, this may be related to love, family, and friendships. Smith (2005) states that different genders spends different time on conversation, females take more time than males on conversation, and they usually see friends as their conversation partners, Interestingly, females’ intimate friendships are more prominent than males’, this may be because of the time it takes. People may have less time with their family when they spend a significant amount of time with friends. In this case, family and friends may negatively correlated, it is difficult to do both, as a result, friends may feel unhappy and then their relationships could be affected. It is essential to manage time and find the balance. People also consider interpersonal compatibility when starting a new relationship, if two people have the same goal, so they achieve outcome compatibility, the possibility of a consensus is usually high, two individuals can adopt their preference strategies for achieving the aim, this tends to be strategic complementarity, when they start a conversation, the process is generally pleasant.

People in good relationships tend to have high compatibility for each other. In addition, various factors for interpersonal relationships have been mentioned above. But the top important factor for people will vary in each individual, meanwhile, it is going to discuss these factors that may affect interpersonal relationships, and try to help people understand it in a new way. It is hypothesized that interpersonal compatibility is the most significant factor for having a good relationships, relevant data will be collected in the following report, further explanation and conclusion will be given as follows.

As Barbara Bush quoted, “To us, family means putting your arms around each other and being there.” There are times that you can be having the most memorable times in your life. But remember, there can be trouble in relationships, but thankfully there is conflict resolution, so it can be able to be fixed, and the problem can be erased before the relationship gets ruined. After all, the future of a child can continue to be enlightened if they have a distinct relationship with the family and members.

There are various ways to have a pleasant and strong connection when it comes to parents. To be simple with the facts, a parent-child relationship is important because it is the one unique bond that supports the physical, emotional and social progression of the child. An example of a strong bond that can be in family-child relationships is in a child’s’ book called: “The Giving Tree”, written by the author Shel Silverstein. And because of how it reflects a family-child bond is important, is how the storyline went on how the boy would come to the tree every day of his life as if the tree was his parent and they had fun together, but as time went on, the boy grew older day by day and spent less time with the tree. However, the boy would come back asking the tree to give him some money, a house to live in, and then a boat to travel “far from here” But the tree was like a very caring and supporting parent, giving everything she had from the apples she grew so he could sell them for money, and the branches that she had which were given to the boy so he could build a house so he could have a place to live and start a family, and also giving her trunk away for his boat. And even though she gave it all away, the tree was happy. The message is that mothers will do anything to benefit the child until they are tired, probably like how the child’s’ parents were when the child was in his/her younger days. As quoted from George Bernard Shaw: “ A delightful family is, but elder heaven.” Furthermore, by its means is that a family in “heaven” will become to have a particularly strong relationship with the parents. Childcare, love, and commitment will linger forever.

Well, there are many ways that good family relationships can come out. For instance, if the child spends time with his or her parents in different sorts of fun activities, then it will improve their courage when they will go do their education at school and can be able to make friends, since all of the time they spent with their parents. Furthermore, it means that it improves how the kid will feel comfortable in his/her environment. To illustrate is that if you get help from your parents on specific subjects, then it will improve their academics in school. It improves self-determination and lowers depression, anxiety, and even lowered self-esteem. There is no such thing better than having a strong relationship with your parents than anyone else besides your family.

There is one of those times when the parent or the child is not being very supportive. This is one of those moments when you need a tool to guide you out of these problems, conflict resolution. Stating this, let’s say that the child is raging over this hard video game and a kid can get stressed out very easily since their brain is not developed. What the parent would do, is that he/she can explain to him/her to calm down and have a talk about it. And also, children that get stressed like this, deserve a little bit of space for themselves to ease the anger out and then talk to the child. He can be able to think it through and he would be calm again. This resolution prevents the kid to be very upset and has lowered self-esteem. Another way that a bond that is at serious risk is that there are parents who have a child who is thirteen years old and he participates in two activities, soccer, and swimming. Yet, he mostly wins soccer but loses in a swimming race, and probably the other way around. And if this keeps ongoing, it can lead him to quit one of his professions. What the parents can do is to first have a small chat about it, and with conflict resolution, the parents can make a daily schedule, on which of the 2 activities he should practice. This strategy allows the kid to order the way he practices, which makes a good impact on the teen. Also, if the parents are not being that supportive, then the child can have a little talk about how they are parenting them and what they can approve in the child’s opinion. Even if there are thick cuts in family relationships that can hurt, they will always heal infinitely.

The future of a child can be different if they have strong relationships with their parents. Bonds can come in many varieties, and the list is endless, and they will also never lead to mental illnesses that impact their health, but even if they do, then it can be solved by conflict resolution. The only special, most unique, and the most important relationship is family. It will lead your kids to a good future with the right amount of love, and determination. All of that hard work will be worth doing, and they will fit right into society.

In addition to the theme of the continuous decline of King Lear in William Shakespeare’s play of the same name and his personal growth as the titular character, the theme of family relationships and their destruction is equally important. It is due to King Lear’s initial misjudgment of Cordelia that the play catalysts towards tragedy.

It could be argued that the drama of King Lear revolves around the destruction of family relationships. Tragedy ultimately emerges from the broken bonds of relatives, most notably between parents and children. This is demonstrated in the first scene of the play when Lear misreads Cordelia’s understated but pure declaration of love for him and subsequently denounces all ‘parental care’. By doing this, he not only withdraws his ‘father’s heart’, but also leaves Britain in the hands of ‘tigers not daughters’ instead of the virtuous Cordelia. Driven by greed, Goneril and Regan fail to show solidarity with their sister and eventually betray their own father to consolidate political power. Although the sisters initially ally with each other, their deep desire for Edmund leads to Goneril murdering Regan, before killing herself. Thus, Lear’s initial dismissal of Cordelia leads to the annihilation of Lear’s entire family line.

Furthermore, the impact of broken family relationships is again emphasized by Edmund in the play. Edmund’s plan to trick Gloucester into disowning his legitimate child Edgar coordinates with Lear’s family situation. He betrays his father and brother, similarly to Goneril and Regan, in order to gain political power, essentially choosing status over family. Despite Edmund being the villain of the piece, the lines “Why brand they us/ With base? With baseness? Bastardy? Base, base?” encourage the audience to feel sympathy for him as he is clearly deeply hurt by the stigma of being a bastard. The fact that Edmund is considered to be less than Edgar due to the circumstances of his birth further highlights questions about parent-child loyalty. Gloucester chooses to acknowledge Edmund’s socially determined status, instead of their biological connection, thus leading to Edmund’s obsession with proving that he is more than what he has been labeled as. Jan Kott states that “’King Lear’ is a play about the disintegration of the world” and the disintegration of family bonds, appears to parallel the destruction of the British state.

To conclude, although the fall of the king is extremely impactful within the play, the broken bonds of family are what ultimately destroy the kingdom. Throughout the play, the betrayal that occurs between both siblings and parents and children is what causes the collapse of the kingdom, as there would have been far less catastrophe had it not been for Lear’s initial misjudgment and Edmund’s conspiracy to trick his father. Furthermore, the fall of the king would not have been so great if it hadn’t been for the betrayal of his two older daughters.

I don’t think my parents were ever in love. My older sister swears they were, but not in a good way. They had that all-consuming love, the type that destroyed everything in its path. They would fight over anything and everything. They’d break plates, and photo frames, and eventually they broke each other. I mean that in both a figurative and literal way, my mom broke my dad’s finger once. After their fights, my dad would just disappear and my mom would beg him to come home or sometimes even send my older sister to act as some sort of mediator. I remember my parents got into a fight over one of my dad’s friends named Shathi about a week before the beginning of my middle school career. He didn’t talk to anyone. He’d go to work, come home, and pass by us with tired eyes. My dad had a lot of “friends”.

I think the worst one was his dead brother’s wife. My parents got divorced during the summer before my junior year of high school. I can remember the day it happened clearly. My parents were arguing about how my father was taking trips to Bangladesh to visit other women while he was unemployed and we were living in a basement. Eventually, my father started to get angry. He grabbed my mother’s hair and started beating her with a broom. My four-year-old brother was sitting, sobbing as the whole spectacle unfolded before his eyes. I picked him up and went to another room and locked the door. My mom started screaming my name and telling me to call the police. My aunt overheard the commotion and she started screaming at me to call the police. Everyone was screaming at me, a girl who was a few months shy of sixteen. As the cops pulled my father away from my mother, I texted a boy I would soon be “friends” with. I’ve witnessed firsthand how badly cheating can ruin a marriage, ruin a home.

I have also been a mistress or as my generation would fondly refer to a side hoe. It sucks on all fronts and hurts everyone that’s involved. “Sexy” by Jhumpa Lahiri was the first piece of writing that actually resonated with me on a surface level, instead of a thematic level. I related to most of the characters in the story and it made me feel less alone. “Sexy”, a short story by Jhumpa Lahiri, is centered around a young white lady named Miranda who is having an affair with an older Indian man named Dev. Miranda meets Dev while she is browsing in Filene’s cosmetics department and Dev is purchasing facial cream for his wife. Dev’s wife is away so Miranda doesn’t feel guilty about her affair. As she continues her affair, her Indian coworker, Laxmi, is giving her updates on a situation happening with her cousin. Her cousin’s husband fell in love with a stranger that he sat next to on a plane. He leaves his family to pursue a relationship with her. It crushes Laxmi’s cousin, leaving her unable to leave her house and take her son to school. Eventually the inevitable happens and Dev’s wife returns. The thrill is gone. The breaking point of the affair is when Miranda babysits Laxmi’s nephew, Rohin.

Major motifs in “Sexy” are race, maturity, infidelity, and the difference between lust and love. Miranda is attracted to Dev for two primary reasons, his age and his race. Dev is the first adult man that Miranda has dated. He is mature, wealthy, and polite. Lahiri expresses this sentiment when she wrote, “Unlike the boys she dated in college, who were simply taller, heavier versions of the ones she dated in high school, Dev was the first always to pay for things, and hold doors open, and reach across a table in a restaurant to kiss her hand.” This detail proves that there is definitely an age difference between Dev and Miranda. Miranda is fresh out of college and Dev has already established his career. With age, there tends to be a shift in the power dynamic of their relationship. The age and racial difference causes Miranda to perceive Dev as exotic and cultured. After their first encounter in Filene’s, Dev follows her out of the store and remarks that the beginning half of her name is Indian. She is immediately intrigued by this. Dev symbolizes a new world to Miranda, something other than what she’s used to, what she’s known, and what she’s experienced. Dating Dev broadened Miranda’s world. Upon questioning Laxmi about what the Taj Mahal is like, Laxmi describes it as, “The most romantic spot on earth.

An everlasting monument to love.” Miranda fantasizes about going there with Dev. Dev is exotic to Miranda since she lives in a predominantly white neighborhood and has only met one other Indian family. Miranda feels that dating Dev will almost be as if she is experiencing his culture. She moved alone from the Midwest and her isolation is coupled with a feeling of inexperience. She tries to learn Bengali, write her name in Dev’s language, try more Indian cuisine, and recalls with shame an incident from her childhood. She is ashamed that she was not more understanding with the Dixit family and dating Dev can absolve her of that shame. She loves Dev despite not knowing much about him. In the end, she realizes that she has fallen for the surface and not the person. The initial novelty of the affair soon wears off after Dev’s wife comes back from India. The relationship soon goes from going to restaurants and romance to staying inside and sleeping together. After Dev’s wife returns, Miranda purchases items that she believes to be fit for a mistress. She buys a silver dress with chains for straps, black stockings, a slip, a robe, and high heels. Lahiri marks the shift in the affair by having Dev reject the clothes that Miranda bought. He completely ignores what she is wearing and after he finally notices, he urges her to take it off so that he can admire her legs. The fantasy of the life Miranda thought she and Dev would have fell apart and their romance fell victim to routine. Babysitting Rohin, Laxmi’s nephew, is the breaking point of the relationship. Rohin urges Miranda to put on the dress that she bought to look like a mistress after he discovers it in a heap on the floor of her closet. At first, she declines but she soon yields to his request. After seeing Miranda in the dress, Rohin declares that she is sexy.

Miranda then demands him to define the term. Rohin then explains by saying, “It means loving someone you don’t know.” Loving someone you don’t know is precisely what Dev, Miranda, and his father are doing. In his phrase, Miranda understands both that she is drawn to Dev for his surface value and also that Dev does not love Miranda for who she is. Even without the dress, she is simply a mistress to him. Miranda thinks back to what she believes was a defining moment in their relationship. Dev called her sexy in the Mapparium. Miranda asks Dev if he remembers what he said to her in the Mapparium and he says he doesn’t. Jhumpa Lahiri creates an amazing balance of “Sexy.” She tells the story using foils instead of focusing on one side of the spectrum. Miranda is dating a married man, whereas Laxmi’s cousin is getting a divorce. It is through hearing Laxmi talk about her cousin that Miranda feels guilty. Through these two women, we see the opposite sides of the affair, the cheated with and the cheated on. I have experienced both sides of the spectrum personally and they both have their pitfalls. Jhumpa Lahiri uses foils in an extremely effective way and that’s why I decided to analyze this story.

Not every marriage has a happily ever after. Mina and Mr. Kapasi have a complicated relationship with their families. Both marriages are failing in multiple ways. Their children play a big role in the failure of their marriages. The willingness to stay faithful to their spouses also aids in the marriages’ downfalls. Love is not always enough to keep a marriage alive, especially if it is one-sided.

Children can make or break a marriage. In Mr. Kapasi and Mina’s case, it broke them. Mr. Kapasi’s son’s death tore and ate away at his marriage until there was nothing but silence between him and his wife. She has little regard for Mr. Kapasi’s career because it is a constant reminder of the son they lost. Mrs. Kapasi starts to “resent[] the other lives he help[s] … to save” because he was unable to save their own son’s life (Lahiri 19). When Mina and her husband had their first child, all of Raj’s attention was diverted to the child. She was jealous of their baby and began to subconsciously hate him. Later, Mina has an illegitimate love child with her husband’s friend. She has felt guilty all these years because of it, but never once mentions it to her husband. As the child, Bobby, gets older, it pains her to see him and be reminded of her mistake. She could not handle being a part of the family any longer.

Mr. Kapasi tried to save his marriage. He works hard to provide financial support for her and his family with “the newer, bigger house, and good schools, and tutors, and fine shoes, and the television, and countless other ways” (Lahiri 19). He sacrificed his “dream[] of being an interpreter for diplomats and dignitaries, resolving conflicts between people and nations, settling disputes of which he alone could understand,” for his family (Lahiri 18). He takes a job as an interpreter for a doctor’s office to pay for his son’s medical bills. He loves his family and works two jobs to make sure they have everything that they want; they are his number one priority. After the death of their son, Mr. Kapasi tries everything in his power to cheer up his wife; unfortunately, none of it is good enough for her. As he and his wife grow more and more distant, he realizes that she no longer loves him. He used to be eager to get home to his wife, but she would only serve him “a cup of tea … in silence” (Lahiri 24). She does not care about his day, or him. He starts staying out later than usual because “the thought of that silence … oppresse[s] him” (Lahiri 24). He is willing to do anything for his family, but he “yearns for some recognition and interest in his life” (Brada Williams 458). Even through it all, Mr. Kapasi continues to try to fix his relationship with his kids and his wife, as well as staying faithful to them.

Unlike Mr. Kapasi, Mina does not care about her marriage. After two years of marriage, Mina was ready to give up. When Mina had their first child, she was “left at home all day with the baby, surrounded by toys that made her trip when she walked or wince when she sat” (Lahiri 26). All her husband’s attention was stolen from her by their baby. They become more distant with each child after. Mina and her husband’s “lack of carefulness in raising their children extends to their carelessness in maintaining their marriage” (Brada-Williams 457). She lashes out and has an affair with Raj’s friend because of his lack of interest in her. She neglects to tell him that Bobby is not his child. Mina lets him believe that she is still in love with him and that they have no flaws in their relationship. She loves her family but values herself far more than them. Mina has a simple life of comfort and ease, but she “yearns to be freed of the responsibilities of [her] marriage and children” (Brada-Williams 458). Mina gives up on her marriage because of the guilt she carries about Bobby; she resents her children. She is more worried about her nails than her children and continuously tells them “[l]eave [her] alone” (Lahiri 16). While Mr. Kapasi is willing to sacrifice his entire career for his family, the most Mina can do is give her daughter a drop of nail polish to keep her quiet. She could not bother to “hold the little girl’s hand as they walk[] to the restroom” (Lahiri 12).

Mina initiates her unhappiness while Mr. Kapasi’s is brought upon him. In each relationship, there is a spouse who is no longer willing to try to keep the family together. Mr. Kapasi is ready to do anything to keep his family together, but Mina could not care less about her marriage or her children. There is no relationship left to salvage in both marriages; they are over.

Works Cited Page

1. Lahiri, Jhumpa. “Interpreter of Maladies.” Houghton Mifflin Company, 1999. https://iblit2013.files.wordpress.com/2013/08/lahiri-interpreter-of-maladies-full-text.pdf
2. Noelle Brada-Williams. “Reading Jhumpa Lahiri’s ‘Interpreter of Maladies’ as a Short Story Cycle.” MELUS, vol. 29, no. 3/4, 2004, pp. 451–464. JSTOR, www.jstor.org/stable/4141867. Accessed 27 Jan. 2020.

I am an eighteen year old Pakistani-American in his first year of college. California, Fremont is where I have spent the majority of my life, although I have spent about two and a half cumulative years abroad in my parent’s homeland, Pakistan. My family tree has and continues to be completely native members of this great country. I believe that this has helped in me being vastly associated and connected to my heritage, the reason that I have such devotion towards my heritage is because it’s what my religion preaches; and that is something I take very seriously. Now, throughout the duration of this autobiography i will be analyzing: race, nationality, and ethnicity; since these major sociological topics play key roles in our everyday lives, and affect how we ultimately turn out as human beings, which I will be showing you exactly how as we head into the first section of my sociological autobiography.

The first sociological topic I want to get into is social interactions. From the section 4.6 of Henslin’s ebook, we see that he describes this concept as a “stereotype” we put up when we are amongst others in public. And I agree with this because I, myself go through this especially in memorable social events that a lot of people I care about, attend. For example, as the book states: “eye contact, smiling, and body language” played a huge role in all of the birthday parties I have had. No matter what I am going through I always try to convey that I am having a great time, because my family and friends are in attendance. To go into depth, during my seventeenth birthday party I had celebrated it in SF, CA during a windy night; I was unaware that’s where i was going to be celebrating it, but even though I didn’t like the cramped streets, and cold weather blowing in my face, I didn’t let it stop me from showing my family that I appreciated what they had done for me by setting up a series of positive social interactions, such as: smiling, showing interest in the plans they had arranged, and being grateful to be able to spend this time with the people I love. As the book states, I was mostly “unaware” of the actions i did because i knew subconsciously how to act in order to influence my family into thinking I was having a great time, which I ended up did having. Another sociological topic, I want to discuss is the concept of social structures. Now, the James Henslin ebook describes this structure as the guiding factor of how we behave with others, whether they be our teachers or strangers; basically this term is defined in 4.2 as: “the ways that people and groups are related to one another”. The reason that I chose to focus on this important concept as one of my sociological topics, is because it really surprises me as i get older how society treats one another without actually knowing them, we just base strangers off what we see. And I have been on both ends of this spectrum. I remember when I was about ten years old, my family decided to enjoy a meal in a fancy restaurant/hotel located in Karachi, Pakistan; all of my family had worn American-styled clothing, while I had worn traditional Pakistani “Shalwar Kameez”, this led to my family having to wait longer to be serviced, and it made me feel sort of out of place, as the establishment were all wearing normal pants and shirts you would see here in America. It was weird and I still remember to this day that I had been involved in not meeting the social rank that everyone else was at which would make the owners of the restaurant believe that I didn’t have enough money to pay for the food, or that i wasn’t as important as the other customers, just because of the clothing I wore.

From part two of this class, I’d like to set my sociological autobiographies primary focus to gender and age, as the first form of social inequality that I’ll be discussing. In 12.3 of our ebook, gender & age is referred to as “the basis for scapegoating.”, I have found this statement to be quite true as children are often scapegoated since they are young and often stereotyped to make mistakes. This is the reason I chose to discuss “gender and age” as a form of social inequality, because it really is an unfair concept which i have been through. Being young, (below the age of twelve) I often found myself in situations where I would not be taken seriously or have credibility. This made it so that I was often grounded for being at the wrong place at the wrong time, or not having my side of the story be taken into consideration by either my parents, or people older than me. Being the youngest in my family also made me an easy target to scapegoat if my siblings, (who were all older than me) made a mistake. My gender didn’t help either since boys have a stereotype to “mess around”, that’s what makes societies take on “gender & age” an inequality, it is unjust how there are societies that are able to label people of a certain age, or gender “scapegoats”.

In the third section of this sociological autobiography, I decided to focus on family as my first social institution from our covered material in part three. The ebook’s definition of a family in 16.1, is quite simple, it is referred to as “ two or more people who consider themselves related by blood, marriage, or adoption.”, and on the surface that’s what a family truly is. Although most individuals have a different “family of orientation”, which is another term from the book that is defined as the family in which a person grows up in. For me, I grew up in a “nuclear family” where I was and still am lucky enough to have both my parents, and three siblings. My family is the driving force and motivation behind the majority of all my decisions whether it be dated back from my youth, or the decisions I make currently as an adult and even all the way up to my future. I have a close family and one that has influenced me to pursue two other social institutions from this class, education & religion. Now you may be wondering what my family has to do with these other two institutions, well because of my family’s influence on me, I have chosen to further my education and keep my religious morals. My family often makes sure to collectively remind me to keep up with both my education and religion. Moving my main focus to education, or as 17.1 of the class book describes it: “a formal system of teaching knowledge, values, and skills” learning new things has always been a trait about myself that I’ve liked. For example when others in my history classes would fall asleep during a video reenactment of historical events, I would always try to take something away from what I would learn, since history is known for repeating itself. When it came to religion in my life, the books definition of religion adhering into a moral community made sense when I read it, because in Islam community is a very important component. In my life, I try my best to go to the mosque for my weekly Friday prayer; the thing about going to the mosque is that there are many other muslims that also attend, some are my friends that I know, some family, and this unites us together as Durkheim stated in his definition of“religion”. I can connect to that definition because every Friday, or even every time that I go to any masjid (mosque) my faith increases because i am with my community, who all believe in the same god as me.