The case under consideration evaluates the situations where a wife and a husband face a number of problems connected with their family life and cannot find another decision but divorce.
The husband believes that it is impossible to trust his wife as she cheats him through the Internet services, and the wife explains that her husband does not want to be involved into their family affairs. Both partners are not confident in the desire to remain committed to each other in this marriage; still, they have to sons, the twins, and have to think about the wellbeing of their children.
The outcome of the situation is not that pleasant: the husband hospitalized because of suicidal ideation subsequent. Both partners are in need of professional help; both partners should evaluate the situation and their life, and both partners should be provided with a chance to develop appropriate communication with each other.
To help two people comprehend their mistakes and choose the most effective solution in such situation, it is possible to make use of Reality Therapy offered Dr. William Glasser at the end of 1965 (Zastrow, 2009).
The main point of the chosen therapy is that it is usually available to anyone and aims at helping people reconnect. This theory best addresses the chosen family’s treatment need as it focuses on the present. It is sometimes wrong to evaluate the actions taken in the past as the main reason of human problems is present discontents, present problems, and present feelings.
People have to comprehend the results of their actions and inabilities to find some common decision. A man could lose his life, and a woman is so involved into personal satisfaction of needs. They cannot evaluate the situation from numerous perspectives and admit how terrible their problems in regard to their children are.
There are two main components of the chosen therapy: the creation of trusting environment where two adults are able to develop conversations and the choice of the ideas which help to define what the patients really want, create a plan, and evaluate whether some negative outcomes may be expected.
The results of the case assessment show that two people are sick and tired of their relations and cannot find appropriate reasons to continue living together. Still, they have already faced similar problems before and managed to find some successful solutions.
This is why it is possible to evaluate their present feelings and problems. This couple is diagnosed as the one with inabilities to plan their future and to think about positive aspects of their life together. The prognosis is the following: in case the couple avoids mutual judgments and constant blaming, they may learn to prevent the situations which may destroy their relations.
For example, it is possible to create a plan according to which the demands of the couple are met. One day is organized in accordance with wife’s demands, the next day is for husband, and one more day has to be devoted to children’s wishes only so that parents could comprehend that they are responsible for two lives they gave birth to one day. If the wife and the husband agree to follow the treatment, the prognosis may become rather promising.
There are some other relevant treatment goals which may be expected: the couple has to be provided with fun and entertainment that is possible in human life. In case they are involved into some activities, they are not bothered with the memories from the past and the misunderstanding they may suffer from.
Finally, it is necessary to keep in mind that human behavior is hard to changes, still, it is possible to create the conditions under which people may feel safe, protection, and pleasure of being together without taking into consideration the troubles and discontents from the past.
Reference List
Zastrow, C. (2009). The Practice of Social Work: A Comprehensive Worktext. Belmont, CA: Cengage Learning.
Marriage is an institution that can be found in any society. Every society has its own definition and arrangement of marriage and as a result, it is likely to find many differences as to what marriage is composed of (Strong, De Vault, and Cohen, 2010).
Nevertheless, in all situations, marriage is always founded on the expectations of the couples to have an enriching experience that is composed of stable and assured companionship, increased financial security, sexual gratification, and more importantly, a welcome relief from stressors of single life (Knox and Schacht, 2009).
Further, marriage has been embraced by the larger society given its immeasurable contribution to the wellbeing of society largely through providing a stable environment for children to be born, grow up, and become members of the society (Nevid, 2007; Strong, De Vault, and Cohen, 2010).
When individuals get married, hope always is that such marriage should stay permanently and continue into unforeseen future. Although this may be the wish of everyone, it is not always that all marriages go well.
Divorce is what characterizes dysfunctional marriages. In its occurrence, divorce has been described to be unhappy occasion since breaking is accompanied by many costs in terms of financial and emotions.
For instance, couples divorcing are forced to divide their families, properties and even their lives, which in most cases is not easy. Fresh research continues to be generated on the most appropriate ways divorce can be reduced in the society (Knox and Schacht, 2009). Therefore, any attempt to explore and carry more research in this field is laudable especially for future policy-work.
That is why research work on the above-proposed title will be a great and positive step towards generating useful information for future policy-work.
Problem statement
Divorce is an issue that is eating modern society and specifically the American society. Research in the area of divorce continues to draw more attention and today more effort has been channeled in researching on the issue. As research in the field continues to draw more interest, there is need also for more research work in the area concerning the various modern programs that are aimed at ensuring divorce rate in the society goes down.
The availability of statistics and profound information on divorce in America makes it possible to design various program-solutions that can be administered to various categories of people who have been identified as the most affected by divorce cases or likelihood. Given that divorce still face stigma in modern society, there are spirited efforts to develop prevention programs that can result into reduction or prevention of divorce.
Such prevention programs have largely been in form of marriage education workshops, where couples meet under a qualified marriage instructor who later provides marriage instructions in key areas such as communication, conflict resolution, and parenting skills. Therefore, an attempt to understand the role, contribution, and effectiveness of the various divorce prevention programs is welcome and timely.
The research will specifically dwell on the conflict resolution programs, whereby through application of both quantitative and qualitative research techniques, there will be an attempt to find and evaluate the success of the programs.
Rationale for the Research
It is no longer secret that divorce is causing negative impacts on the society as a whole (Fletcher, 2002). Today, estimates indicate that for the last ten years, divorce rate in the American society has remained stable at 50% for the first marriages, 65% for the second marriages and higher statistics for the rest successive marriages (Fletcher, 2002).
Garner (2008) observes that divorce in modern American society is a serious problem that is “affecting an exponentially increasing number of people.” The author goes a head to note that about 50% of those divorcing manifest lack of civilized relations with each other in their marriage (Garner, 2008).
Further, another 50% of those who divorce were found “continued with the conflict and problems they had in the marriage or possibly worse” (Garner, 2008).
In another related research, Hetherington found out that “80% of people do not improve their lives by divorcing their spouses” (Garner, 2008). As such divorce was identified as a problem in society that “affects couples who went through divorce, their children, parents, extended family and friends” (Garner, 2008).
For example, statistics shows that 10% of adults who divorce experience serious problems while 10-15% of children also experience serious problems (Garner, 2008). Therefore, in American society today, “millions of people are living with serious problems due of their own or their parents divorcing” (Garner, 2008).
Given these alarming statistics, it is evident that an attempt to carry out detailed research work in the issue of divorce is welcome provided the generated information will unravel some of the issues still untouched.
Therefore the rationale for this research paper will be to gain greater understanding of how divorce prevention programs work and in which way such programs can be enhanced to ensure their effectiveness in reducing cases of divorce in American society
Research hypothesis
Hypotheses are educated guesses at what the outcome of the study may be (Hall 2008). In this particular research study, the hypothesis to be statistically investigated is:
Does marital counseling contribute to lower statistics of divorces than divorces without marital counseling?
Research Objectives
The motivation in undertaking any research work is usually inscribed in the overall objective of the research. Thus, research objectives constitute all those reasons why the research is necessary and has to be undertaken and what will be the impact or benefit of the research.
Divorce is currently impacting the family and larger society negatively. At the same time, divorce is still largely stigmatized and therefore whenever it takes place, it leaves the victims both financially, socially, psychologically, and physically deprived.
With this in mind, undertaking a research on the divorce prevention programs is necessary and timely for the research will be able to provide important information concerning divorce in American society. Information will be generated through both quantitative and qualitative instruments and information is perceived to meet certain objectives. First, information concerning divorce rate and the current statistics will be generated.
This will be critical to have accurate information concerning divorce rate in America. Second, the research will identify some of the effective divorce prevention programs that have been implemented in society. In doing so, the research will be able to assess their effectiveness and possible recommendations for improvement.
As such, information generated and compiled will be important to various stakeholders in the field of marriage counseling especially at policy level. Divorce prevention programs need to be created on the understanding of existing programs, there effectiveness and the need to re-equip and re-structure them.
Therefore, this research will be appropriate in providing such information. Lastly, given this research will look at divorce conflict prevention programs, a solid body of knowledge will be created and this will serve as a solid ground for future research work in the field.
Definition of terms
Counseling: This is a process whereby specialized skills are employed in helping people with emotional, situational, psychological, or practical issues in the daily life (Guindon, 2010).
Couples: These are partners dating, engaged, unmarried living together, or married and living together (Hunt, Hof and DeMaria, 1998).
Divorce: This is a concept that has been defined as the formal dissolution of a valid marriage by judicial decree (Mitchell, 2009).
Divorce prevention: a process that involves raising marriage protective factors and lowering marriage risk factors (Harvey and Wenzel, 2002).
Society: This is a composition of persons who exhibit diverse beliefs and ways of living, who live in a particulate defined locality (Stubbs, 1996).
Chapter summary
Divorce in contemporary society is rampant and its impact to the larger society is evident. American society has become one of the major casualties where divorcing is greatly affecting many people. In order to handle the problem more effectively, there is paramount need to understand the factors contributing to divorce.
Thereafter, more effort should be made at identifying some of the divorce prevention programs available, their strengths, and weaknesses. Lastly, when the above has been done, attention should be directed at evaluating the effectiveness of the programs to discover whether they actually help reduce divorce rate in society.
Overall, this section is basically concerned with introducing the idea that appropriate divorce counseling and prevention programs lead to reduction in divorce cases.
Review of Related Literature
Divorce process and factors that contribute to divorce
Life events combine with daily stressors to constitute key factors that make marriage break (Gold, 1988). These key stressors and life events have been categorized into two major groups: macro-factors of divorce and micro factors of divorce (Knox and Schacht, 2009).
Some of the macro-factors contributing to increased divorce in society include increased economic independence of women, whereby women who finds gainful employment outside their homes may decide to leave their husbands in order to pursue their careers (Knox and Schacht, 2009).
Another factor is the changing family functions and structure in the modern world, whereby many of the protective, religious, educational, and recreational functions of the family have been substituted by outside agencies (Knox and Schacht, 2009).
Another reason has to do with changing and liberalizing divorce laws, where in America majority of states recognizes some forms of non-fault divorce (Knox and Schacht, 2009). At the same time, in the modern society there are fewer moral and religious sanctions, where marriage is being viewed as a secular entity and not a religious obligation (Knox and Schacht, 2009).
With these understanding among many people, divorce today is accepted more easily will little moral orb religious sanctions. Other macro-factors contributing to divorce include those marrying for the first time are likely to divorce since couples view such marriages as temporal (Knox and Schacht, 2009).
Today American society is full of more divorce models thus many people especially youth couples are likely to divorce as a result of influence from the model (Knox and Schacht, 2009). Lastly, macro-factors such as mobility and anonymity and individualistic goals cultural goal of happiness have all contributed to increasing divorce rates in USA (Knox and Schacht, 2009).
Macro-factors have to do largely with the individual and immediate family specifically with regard to the type of relationships couples establish. Key factors in this category contributing to divorce include loss of love, where when couples feel that the other partner does not love her or him, divorce may be embrace (Knox and Schacht, 2009). Negative behaviors from both partners may infuriate the other and divorce may be sought.
When there is total absence of conflict resolution skills, couples may find it difficult to cope with the other and hence divorce may be the solution to their persistent conflicts (Knox and Schacht, 2009). Values changes by couples may results into differences that may be a problem to solve and when they become mature, tolerance level collapses and couples may seek divorce (Knox and Schacht, 2009).
Other micro-factors identified include aspects such as satiation where couples loose desire for each other; extra-marital relationships; and the increasing societal perception that divorcing is better than being married (Knox and Schacht, 2009).
Other related factors include: having little in common; courting for a shorter period; marrying while still young; differences as a result of race, education, age and religion; and lastly, poor communication skills (Knox and Schacht, 2009).
Strength of Current Divorce Prevention Programs in USA?
Divorce prevention in the society has become pre-occupation of many counselors and therapists. John H. Harvey and Amy Wenzel, observe that there exists a multitude of divorce prevention programs but in general, there is scarcity of research addressing the effectiveness of majority of these programs (Harvey and Wenzel, 2002).
In most cases, marriage education workshops have been established and used as mechanisms to bring couples together and provide useful advice information with regard to communication, conflict resolution and parenting skills (Knox and Schacht, 2009).
As a result of these marriage workshops, Stanley (2005) found that the programs had positive outcomes in marital functioning (cited in Knox and Schacht, 2009). Further, it should be noted that majority of prevention programs have originated from skills training approach (Harvey and Wenzel, 2002).
According to the skills training approach, emphasis is put on teaching couple’s skills that are important in managing differences, disagreements and conflicts that may arise in the family (Harvey and Wenzel, 2002). These prevention programs have identified communication as key aspect that when effectively trained can help couples solve and manage their conflicts.
As a result, the key component of these programs has been training couples in effective communication strategies (Harvey and Wenzel, 2002). Therefore, some notable prevention programs include prevention and relationship enhancement program (PREP); relationship enhancement (RE); and couples communication (CC) programs (Harvey and Wenzel, 2002).
Relationship Enhancement (RE) is a program that is designed to develop empathy and mutual understanding with aim of enhancing intimacy, manage conflict, and effectively deal with numerous difficulties that emerge among couples (Byington and Seattle Pacific University, 2009). It has been identified that Couples differences may originate from the following sources: differences in beliefs, feelings, needs, and desires.
Therefore, the foundation of the program basing on these differences has been constructed based on a set of ten communication and problem-solving skills where couples are able to identify and address the most issues affecting their relationship (Byington and Seattle Pacific University, 2009).
The author observes that RE are largely enhanced with the aim of not just changing the dysfunctional behaviors with couple relationship, but also empowering couples in order to prevent future problems or to equip the couples have faster conflict resolution skills in future problems (Byington and Seattle Pacific University, 2009).
There has been identification of four major skills that RE deals with speaking, listening, role switching and facilitating (Byington and Seattle Pacific University, 2009).Effectiveness of these programs has been evaluated by numerous researchers. For example, the RE has been found to be effective in terms of communication skills, disclosure, and empathy for the participants in the program (Harvey and Wenzel, 2002).
At the same time, Byington and Seattle Pacific University (2009) observes that RE as compared to CC, manifest more superior capabilities whereby RE has been found to increase marital satisfaction as demonstrated from Marital Communication Inventory and a follow-up test of three months (Byington and Seattle Pacific University, 2009).
Further comparison has been made between RE and waitlist control group where it has been found that there are significant improvements in marital quality as evidenced from the Interpersonal Relationship Scale (Byington and Seattle Pacific University, 2009).
The second program is the couple communication (CC) which initially was known as the Minnesota Couples Communication Project (Harvey and Wenzel, 2002). CC is developed from combination of related theories largely grounded in system theory, communication theory, and family development theory (Miller et al., 1976 cited in Harvey and Wenzel, 2002).
In designing and implementing the program, two goals are desired: provide help to couples to develop greater understanding of their interaction patterns and rules of communication (Harvey and Wenzel, 2002).
Second, the program aims at increasing the ability to change the current interactions rules and patterns that are not effective and advising the couples to embrace direct, clear, and open communication about the relationship (Harvey and Wenzel, 2002).
With regard to couple’s communication (CC) program, meta-analysis research has established that the program has been found to exhibit positive outcomes among the participants (Harvey and Wenzel, 2002).
For instance, the program had positive results for couples observed communication skills and on the couples self-report of communication skills (Harvey and Wenzel, 2002). Nevertheless, it was also established that the effect size of CC declined on subsequent follow-ups (Harvey and Wenzel, 2002).
The third prevention program is the PREP where marriage couples are trained in skills that intend to avert future distress in their relationships (Harvey and Wenzel, 2002). Development of PREP was largely based on knowledge acquired through empirical research (Segrin and Flora, 2005).
Accordingly, PREP is premised on the need to identify those phenomena that have high potential of resulting into marital satisfaction and stability or deterioration (Segrin and Flora, 2005).
Four major goals have been identified that PREP address: teaching good communication skills; clarifying and evaluating expectations for marriage; creating an understanding about choices and commitment to the relationship; and enhancing the couple’s bond through fun, friendship and sensuality (Stanley et al. 1999 cited in Segrin and Flora, 2005).
In an attempt to carry out evaluation of this program, extensive designed studies have been carried out among different population groups. In some of the designed studies that have been carried out, it has been found out that couples who take part in PREP in most cases exhibit increased positive communication and decreased negative communication as compared to control groups (Stanley et al., 2001 cited in Segrin and Flora, 2005).
Moreover, it has been found that participating in PREP for longer periods, couples exhibited higher relational satisfaction, fewer sexual difficulties and fewer instances of physical violence as compared to couples in control groups (Markman et al., 1993 cited in Segrin and Flora, 2005).
What are some of the Weaknesses of the Identified Programs?
Related research on PREP has indicated that after about four or five years after participating in PREP, couples manifested no significant differences in the divorce and separation rate of couples who had participated in PREP (Markman et al., 1993 cited in Segrin and Flora, 2005).
At the same time, more research was undertaken in Netherlands whereby statistics indicated that upon completion of the program, there were no recorded reduction in breakups, problem intensity had increased and sexual dissatisfaction were higher as compared to couples who were under control studies (Van-Widenfelf, Hosman, Schaap and Staak, 1996 cited in Segrin and Flora, 2005).
Other identified weakness of this program has to do with potential self-selection bias that ultimately leads to fewer couples completing the program thus evaluation may not capture the actual picture on the ground. As a result, testing and evaluating the success of PREP has only involved highly motivated couples in program (Segrin and Flora, 2005).
Relationship Enhancement (RE) programs have also been found to exhibit some weakness. For example, through an assessment that was carried out on the program involving the educated and less educated couples, (Halford, 2011) found out that generalizability of the results was for educated couples (Halford, 2011).
In this way, generalizability of less educated couples is still untested, a situation that renders the program to be somehow ineffective. Another weakness of this program has to do with exclusive reliance on self-report assessment. (Halford, 2011) observes that self-report may not accurately identify some key risk factors.
More so, Sanders et al. (1999) note that self-reports of couple communication in early stage relationships often do not reflect subtle communication deficits that are detectable with observational assessment (Halford, 2011).
Couple’s Communication, just like other programs of marriage counseling has exhibited some weaknesses. In a well-concluded research Butler and Wampler (1999) observes that CC has a smaller effect on couple’s self-report of communication skills (Harvey and Wenzel, 2002).
Further, it has been found out that gains achieved through impacting communication skills among couples tended to decrease and even deteriorate as time went by (Harvey and Wenzel, 2002).
Lastly, although CC proved to be effective and useful to enhancing couple’s relationship satisfaction immediately after taking part in the program, it was noted that, the overall effect reduced to moderate in the subsequent follow-up (Harvey and Wenzel, 2002).
Chapter summary
In this chapter, marriage was identified to be the dream of many people and hope is always that once married couples should stay into indefinite future. In this chapter evidence have shown that couples are faced with many life events and stressors that when inappropriately managed results into conflicts.
Conflicts were found to characterize many marriages where sometimes couples may find it difficult to form meaningful relationship and conflict resolution strategies.
When this happen, then divorce is likely to occur. Nevertheless, numerous programs were identified that have been used to provide conflict resolution strategies to couples that in turn help such couples avoid likeliness of divorcing. Researches from multiple authors have confirmed the effectiveness of these programs but there is need for improvement to realize meaningful results.
Methodology
This section aims to provide the structure of the study, which will serve as a guide for the overall flow of the research. Identifying the most appropriate research design, data collection technique, setting and sample of the study, instruments, and data analysis will help in the attainment of the main goal of this research proposal. The methodology section is sub-divided under the following sub-headings:
Research Participants
It is proposed that this particular study will gauge on both constructionist and positivistic approach (Gergen, 1999 cited in Bakhurst, 2011) wherein scientific and rational justification shall be implemented in coordination with subjective construction of insights entailed by constructionism (Audi, 2010). To achieve this objective, the research will select participants in the most appropriate way that avoid bias.
Therefore, research participants to be included in this study will include soldiers in their first marriage, soldiers in their second marriage and divorces from the United States Army Reserve Command. Further, the study will also incorporate a counselor from the Family Advocacy Center at Fort Bragg, NC.
Research Design
As this study will utilize both constructionist and positivistic paradigms, the focal point will be to derive objectivity and in-depth analysis of the study. In so doing, quantitative and qualitative approaches are applied.
Through a combination of these research designs, data to be retrieved will be gauged using both strength of qualitative and quantitative designs, which include the strength of validity and reliability found in quantitative approach, while the qualitative design offers in-depth analysis of data.
In this manner, it is expected that a more robust and meaningful conclusion can be gauged by the research (Bryman, 1988 cited in Udokwu and University of Missouri, 2009).
Research objectives and research questions are developed in order to set the focus of the study. For this research paper, descriptive research will be adopted implying that the study shall gauge on existing characteristics of the variables under the study within its own natural setting.
The study will initially locate and identify divorce prevention programs that have been designed and implemented in USA. The respondents will be soldiers from the United States Army Reserve Command and a counselor from Family Advocacy Center at Fort Bragg, NC. First, the research will start by contacting the counselor where a survey will be carried out on the existing programs.
Then survey will also incorporate the soldiers who have participated in these programs. The counselor’s opinion and perception will be sought through the interviewed on how counseling programs have been effective in reducing divorce cases. Thus, it will be possible to learn the programs, which have been effectively implemented. Survey of soldiers’ feedback will be necessary for feedback purposes.
Proposed Analysis of the Data
The instrument to be utilized is a self-developed questionnaire, which will be composed of ten items with additional eleven open-ended interview questionnaires. The first set is gauged to inquire the counselor’s opinion and perception on how effective and successful the divorce prevention programs have been achieving goals of divorce reduction. Four likert scales will be used to assess the strength of agreement on each item.
On the other hand, the second set is for the survey of soldiers who have taken part in these programs. The eleven-item questionnaire will supplement information for the answers derived from the interview with counseling therapists. Data will be analyzed using Microsoft Excel, 2010 version.
Various pivot tables in form of frequencies, mean, and mode will be used for cross tabulation. In addition, graphs of comparison will be used and other statistical data will be accomplished using different Function tools within Excel. Data analysis will be in accordance to stated research questions and research hypothesis.
Results expected from the study include the number of soldiers who have participated in marriage and divorce prevention programs; the number of times participated; the duration that was spend in the program; the designation and process of teaching the program. At the same time, rate of divorce, weak marriages and young marriages will be generated from the three categories of marriages: first, second and divorces.
At the same time, results concerning reasons as to why people divorce will be generated from the research. The number of counseling programs, their rate of effectiveness, and their rate of failure will be generated.
Determination and analysis of categories of respondents will largely be demonstrated through use of mean tables, graphs, and pie charts. Percentages will be calculated with regard to responses on any given variable being investigated.
Implications and limitations
It is implied that counseling actually helps keeps marriages health and couples. Counseling will prevent divorces; however, this is not always the case. Even with adoption of some counseling programs, the rate of divorce in the population remains unchanged.
Some of the identified weaknesses of the programs have to do with ineffectiveness in self-assessment reports, lack of representative samples in gauging effectiveness of programs and deterioration of impact over a long period. Therefore, it is required that for effectiveness to be realized need assessment of client has to be thoroughly undertaken before recommending any particular program to the client.
Given that divorce is an issue that is complex and one that no particular individual would find great pleasure in narrating: time and financial resources may be a limit. This is particularly with regard to large number of respondents the research will want to interview.
Another limitation may arise from research instrumentation, whereby the selected samples may not provide the exact information concerning their reasons for divorce especially those perceived to be private and secret.
Lastly, limitation of the research will be exhibited in terms of content, whereby the research will confine itself to conflict resolution programs and how success they are. Thus, information on other programs such as communication and parenting styles may not be investigated.
Ethics of Research
Research ethics imply the cautious administration of research procedures especially when it comes to human subjects. In which case, this study shall be composed of human participants, thus, ethical processes must be observed. First permission will be sought from relevant regulatory board for the research proposal.
After obtaining the necessary approval, finding the right settings for the study and the participants who will be involved in the research will be the next step. Thus, prospective therapists and beneficiary participants will be gauged from the list obtained from the department. To apply fairness, a random selection technique shall be applied. In this manner, anonymity and confidentiality of information are important considerations.
Prior to continuing with the research, it is vitally important that consent be derived from the participants. Apart from this, the objective of the study is also explained to the therapists so as for them to know the honest intention of the research. Likewise, they will be guaranteed access to the results of the study and information on best practices, which can be applied in their context.
Chapter summary
The methodology for this study will be mixed methodology such that it will apply both qualitative and quantitative research designs. The main objective of which is to utilize the collaborative strength of the two research designs where the quantitative design is able to provide reliable and objective results whilst the qualitative research applies in-depth analysis of data.
Research instruments to be used will be self-developed questionnaires and Four likert scales. Through these instruments it is believed that appropriate and accurate data will be generated that will further be analyzed through Microsoft Excel, 2010 version and various pivotal tables.
Conclusion
Divorce in American society is rife and the problem can be tackled by implementation of appropriate prevention programs. There exists numerous prevention programs as identified and each has its own strengths and weaknesses. However, there is necessity for research on the effectiveness and success of the programs in order to ensure future programs are enhanced when designing is taking place.
This will ensure meaningful results are realized with regard to divorce prevention in the American society. Through undertaking this research, it is believed a body of knowledge will be created that in turn will offer insight in to the success of divorce prevention programs. This will enable key stakeholders to utilize the information in more meaningful and productive way.
References
Audi, R. (2010). Epistemology: A Contemporary introduction to the theory of knowledge. NY: Taylor & Francis. Web.
Garner, C. N. (2008). “The reality of divorce: A Study of the effects of divorce on parents and their children.” Fortified Marriages Ministry, Liberty University. Web.
Udokwu, C. J. and University of Missouri. (2009). Investigation of urban science teachers’ pedagogical engagements: Are urban science teachers culturally responsive? MI: ProQuest LLC. Web.
Divorce is the termination of relationships between married couples. Divorce could be decided through a court litigation or mediation. Several factors have been shown to lead to increased rates of divorce in the society. This paper introduces the divorce topic by discussing the types, causes, and impacts of divorce. It presents three models for assessing whether the independent variables lead to lower rates of divorce among rich couples.
The paper discusses the anticipated data and how it would be collected and quantified for statistical analysis. Finally, the paper discusses the significance of the anticipated findings and offers a conclusion based on the research question.
Introduction
Divorce refers to the termination of a union between the married couple. It involves ending all legal marital obligations. In many countries, divorce cases are sanctioned by courts through legal processes. However, the Philippines and the Vatican City are the only countries that do not allow divorce.
Divorce has been proven to be a stressful event that has influence on finances, lifestyles, and schedules of both people. The proposed study aims to answer the following research question:
Do financial stability, faithfulness, and sexual satisfaction contribute to lower divorce rates among rich couples?
Divorce cases among young and old married couples have been on the increase around the world in the recent decades. Several factors have been cited to cause the increase in divorce rates. It would be essential to understand the various aspects of divorce cases among couples so that measures could be implemented to help save marriages in the future.
Literature review
There are many types of divorce across the world as stipulated by national laws. Contested divorce cases are taken to courts so that a judge can decide on the disputed issues. A divorce case is taken to court if a couple is not able to agree on some issues like child uptake and property sharing. Such cases take long periods of time to be concluded by judges, and the couple has to pay for legal representation in courts.
Once a verdict is given, a partner can feel dissatisfied and file an appeal. An appeal could be rejected or upheld based on the legal evidence produced in court. At-fault divorce requires one partner to allege that his or her partner has committed an act that is not acceptable in marriage. The acts committed by the partner could be unfaithfulness, abandonment and/or cruelty.
No-fault divorce does not require a partner to prove that his or her partner has committed one of such acts. Spouses could decide to part ways because they felt that their union could not work any longer. Still, a judge can consider factors like past violence and marital irresponsibility issues when deciding on division of property and children’s upkeep.
A summary divorce requires spouses to fulfil some legal requirements before they can be allowed to end their union. The legal requirements can be short marriages as defined by the law, minimal real property, and absence of children, among others. Uncontested divorce is the termination of marriage whereby both spouses agree on children’s upkeep, division of property and support issues without the use of mediators or lawyers.
A collaborative divorce is a termination of marriage whereby spouses are helped to reach a resolution with the assistance of attorneys. A mediated divorce is a termination of marriage which involves the use of mediators to facilitate sharing of marital property and children’s upkeep.
A mediated divorce is cheaper than a divorce which is taken to a court for litigation. Mediators can be financial analysts and counsellors who work to help a couple to understand and accept divorce issues.
Polygamous marriages have been shown to have more cases of divorce than monogamous marriages (Brinig & Nock, 2009; Kitson & Holmes, 1992). Divorce in a polygamous marriage can be facilitated by financial constraints, childlessness, and sexual dissatisfaction.
Unfaithfulness among spouses is a major cause of divorce in marriages. Unfaithfulness cases have been on the increase across the world due to many socio-economic factors (Lefkowitz & Fant, 2005).
Research shows that divorce can result in less conflict at home, which is a positive side. However, divorce causes financial instability if one partner loses financial support. Parental skills have been shown to minimize following divorce. However, the skills increase about 2 years after the divorce.
Children are the main losers in the event that their parents divorce. If parents divorce, their children tend to have unhappy, dissatisfied, and depressed time. Such children lack parental love which is essential in the upbringing of socially healthy personalities.
Children whose parents separate have been shown to have lower academic performance than children whose parents have not divorced. This could be attributed to the guidance that the children get from their parents in intact families (Smart, Neale & Wade, 2001).
Divorce among the elderly has been on the increase due to the improvement in longevity and economics. For example, many women are becoming financially independent. As a result, more financially able women are divorcing their husbands (Amato, 2010; Wickelgren, 2009).
Methods
Model 1: It would hypothesize that there is no relationship between lower rates of divorce and faithfulness among rich couples. The model would also hypothesize that faithfulness is not a contributing factor to divorce in marriages.
The model would start by defining the problem, divorce, among rich couples. It would collect data to test whether the assumptions are supported. If they are not supported, the model would go back to the first process of defining the problem and testing the hypotheses again (iterative process).
Model 2: The model would hypothesize that there is no correlation between lower divorce rates among rich couples and financial stability. The other hypothesis would assume that finances do not play a significant role in promoting longevity of marriages among rich couples.
The model would define the problem and then collect qualitative data to test the hypotheses. The processes in the model would be iterative to assess whether the hypotheses would be supported by the data when the modelling processes are repeated.
Model 3: It would hypothesize that there is no relationship between lower divorce rates and sexual satisfaction among rich couples. It would also hypothesize that sexual satisfaction is not a major factor that contributes to divorce.
The model would aim to collect data on sexual satisfaction among rich couples and compare them to divorce rates. If the hypotheses are not supported by the data analyzed, then the iterative process of modelling would be repeated to assess whether the hypotheses are supported.
Data
The proposed study will collect qualitative data for the variables contained in the research question. The independent variables will be the factors that lead to divorce which are faithfulness, sexual satisfaction and financial stability, while the dependent variable will be the rates of divorce. Sexual satisfaction could be a factor that makes couples stay together in marriage.
In case spouses are not satisfied sexually, then they could opt to terminate their marriage. Financial problems bring stress in families leading to divorce. On the other hand, it could be that financial stability in rich couple marriages contributes to lower divorce rates.
Unfaithfulness by a partner in a marriage can cause the other partner to initiate divorce. However, spouses could stay happily married if neither spouse is engaged in marital unfaithfulness acts. The qualitative data will be collected in the form of words and statements and coded so that it could be changed to quantitative data for statistical analysis. Questionnaires and personal interviews will be used to collect the data.
Results and findings
All the assumptions in the models are null hypotheses. For the hypotheses to be supported, the analyzed data should show that the independent variables are not significantly correlated with the dependent variable. If the data do not support the formulated null hypotheses, then they would support alternative hypotheses which are stated in the affirmative.
Conclusion
If the null hypotheses in the models will not be supported by the analyzed data, then it will be concluded that the independent variables contribute to lower rates of divorce among rich couples.
On the other hand, if the null hypotheses are supported then it will be concluded that the causative factors (the independent variables) do not lead to lower divorce rates among rich couples. The two conclusions would be based on the research question formulated in the study.
References
Amato, P. R. (2010). Research on divorce: Continuing trends and new developments. Journal of Marriage and Family, 72(3), 650-666.
Brinig, M. F., & Nock, S. L. (2009). One-Size-Fits-All Family, The. Santa Clara L. Rev., 49(1), 137.
Kitson, G. C., & Holmes, W. M. (1992). Portrait of divorce: Adjustment to marital breakdown. New York, NY: Guilford Press.
Lefkowitz, M. R., & Fant, M. B. (Eds.). (2005). Women’s life in Greece and Rome: a source book in translation. Baltimore, MD: Johns Hopkins University Press.
Smart, C., Neale, B., & Wade, A. (2001). The changing experience of childhood: Families and divorce. Cambridge, England: Polity.
Wickelgren, A. L. (2009). Why divorce laws matter: Incentives for noncontractible marital investments under unilateral and consent divorce. Journal of Law, Economics, and Organization, 25(1), 80-106.
Marriage is not only a social institution. It is a spiritual alliance between two people who love each other and in which belief and trust are the necessary parts of its development. However, many couples often can face definite difficulties with their marriages because they can deviate from the way on which they should follow the principles of marriage given in the Bible.
There are a lot of issues in marriage which are difficult to solve only according to the social and moral rules and norms. It is significant to remember what the Lord says about marriage in order to complete his will and find the peace in souls and the marriage. The Bible says that man could not be alone. That is why it is necessary to do all possible to find the harmony and light in marriage.
It is known that according to the Christian tradition a couple can be considered as married when a man and a woman have exchanged the vows in the presence of a priest and witnesses. Thus, “marriage is an exclusive relationship. The total unity of persons – physically, emotionally, intellectually, and spiritually – comprehended by the concept “one flesh”.1
It is important to be married in front of God’s face; this concept differs from the social perception of the marriage. That is why promiscuity is also forbidden according to the Christian tradition. Thus, that marriage which was not honored in church is considered as not holy.
The Bible says that “marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral”.2 If the marriage is holy, there is no place for adulterer in it.
When a couple wants to marry it is significant to remember about the responsibility. The church rejects the majority of divorces because these two people have vowed to be together in spite of the difficulties and temptations. “Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate”. 3
Moreover, “God instituted marriage so that men and women might complete one another and share in his creative work through the procreation of children”.4 That is why the problem of divorce in relation to the Word is still discussed by scholars.
There are some visions of the issue according to which divorce and remarriage can be allowed in certain circumstances as it is can be interpreted from the words of New Testament.5 Nevertheless, the traditional opinion on marriage does not allow divorces.
“Has not the Lord made them one? In flesh and spirit they are his. And why one? Because he was seeking godly offspring. So guard yourself in your spirit, and do not break faith with the wife of your youth”.6
Today two visions of the divorce issue exist. Many Christians interpret the Word of New Testament and emphasize the problem of adultery as the main reason for the permission of the divorce and for the remarriage. However, we cannot say strictly about the facts because the Bible says clearly about the situation when one of two people is dead and their right to be married again.7
Marriage is the base for the spiritual development of two people who live in love and have children. Moreover, the family as the result of marriage is the important social cell. To feel safety and harmony in the heart, it is necessary to follow the holy principles described in the Bible and remember that couple is a unity which cannot be separated because it is saved by God.
Bibliography
Elwell, Walter A., ed. Evangelical Dictionary of Theology. USA: Baker Academic, 2001.
The Holy Bible. English Standard Version. USA: Crossway Bibles. Towns, Elmer L. Theology for Today. USA: Cengage Learning, 2008.
Footnotes
1 Walter A. Elwell, ed. Evangelical Dictionary of Theology (USA: Baker Academic, 2001), 743.
2 Hebr. 13:4-7.
3 Matt. 19:6.
4 Walter A. Elwell, ed. Evangelical Dictionary of Theology (USA: Baker Academic, 2001), 743.
5 Elmer L. Towns. Theology for Today (USA: Cengage Learning, 2008).
6 Mal. 2:15.
7 Elmer L. Towns. Theology for Today (USA: Cengage Learning, 2008).
It is generally regarded that marriage is the ultimate criterion for having a successful life and a fruitful family history. On the other hand, love is highly considered the principal factor in marriage and divorce. This essay aims to identify and assess common issues surrounding love and marriage as they affect the latter’s planning and maintenance.
Conventional marriage involves a man and a woman who undergo a rite of being betrothed and swears under oath to stay together for the rest of their lives. This process is commonly referred to as a wedding which is a celebration of the unity of two people as they make their vows public declarations. The common wedding arrangement is not the only way of getting married since there are a handful of other factors that influence and affect this decision-making. There are informal marriages or arranged marriages, for example (Nock 53). Obviously, marriage does not only entail the bliss of the wedding rituals and honeymoons. The real essence of marriage lies in the commitment or the span of time in which the vows are kept. However, Gregory Corso’s poem “Marriage” has a very different view of marriage. It seems to be a very pessimistic notion wherein the narrator appears to be debating whether to get married or not. He weighs the possible outcomes, and mostly, these were negative elements such as discrimination of his side of the family who are expected to wait only for food and drink during the wedding, other wedding attendees all trying hard to be jubilant with suggestions of obscene portraits of their honeymoon and the prospect of having scrawny children and a nagging wife. On the other hand, there are also very short glimpses of positive thoughts such as a clean and proper wife and the things he would do with his children which were.
Why are these notions so common? It is because we are too well exposed to these kinds of marriage situations. I have relatives and cousins who got into marriage sooner than expected. Both sides were not able to screen the husband and wife and their families. My cousin does not entirely know the personality of her partner and important background, which literally led to a disastrous marriage.
Marriage is a union of two different individuals in terms of family, culture, and social backgrounds. It is both a sacred and legal process for most societies which leads to specific and established rights, obligations, and provisions (Glenn, p. 15). Again, Gregory Corso’s “Marriage” has a different view. The narrator sees it only as a necessary process for every individual driven by fear of not having someone to marry and be alone for the rest of his life, uttering – “All the universe is married!” He thinks that he should marry since everyone is marrying and expected to be married before they get old or die. The poem has no single reference to marriage resembling a solemn ritual. It is more of a circus the way he describes it. He claims that everyone would know, and yet he himself does not feel excited and does not comprehend the meaning of it all. In addition, he feels as though in despair instead of being celebratory.
This naturally results in marriages that are not planned or expected. There are people who get married for various reasons except for love and commitment. A friend once confided that he got married only because his girlfriend got pregnant. Obviously, they are both not ready to face married life and, more importantly, the responsibility of rearing a child. Apart from not being ready how to build a family, they are also not very familiar with each other’s family background and personality. In consequence, the wedding date becomes a nightmare for each party, and the subsequent married life would seem a very unfamiliar and tumultuous territory, just like what the narrator in “Marriage” by Gregory Corso described.
In my opinion, these are very dark prospects of married life that can be readily avoided by choosing the partner carefully, even during courtship and dating. This would enable my partner and me to get to know more of each other. In addition, we can discuss plans and aspirations, which will be important for preparing for marriage so as not to be surprised by surprises such as pregnancy.
Raising and parenting children is an entirely new dimension of married life. Every couple who plans to get married plans and looks forward to the prospect of having children and guiding them through adulthood. This union serves to provide the setting for having and raising morally upright persons. These children will also become parents in the future and continue the family bloodline and traditions (Brown & Booth 668). Gregory Corso’s “Marriage” presents a varying view on raising children. The narrator certainly knows the responsibilities of fathering. He even knows specific activities that a father and children usually do. In his mind, these are apparently enjoyable opportunities in nurturing a connection and instilling all the messages that he can give to his children. But the narrator is somehow apprehensive of the things he will be able or not able to do. The poem’s narrator even asks himself if he wants to do those things. He seems to be in a bind for things that he does not know or has not experienced yet.
I have relatives and friends who underwent such situations. They were really apprehensive of things that will come. Prospective mothers and fathers cannot help but think if they would be good parents in the future. Many pictures and ideas are formed in their head based on their own experience as children and from references of friends and other relatives. For me, these are unnecessary worries, although unavoidable. However, it can somehow prepare a person to become more responsible in fathering or mother a child by asking questions and internalizing things that are bothering him or her. Instead of fear, this should be replaced by the hope that things would get better in the coming developments so that actions needed to be taken easily achieved.
Marriage failures are not unavoidable situations. Married people are also ordinary persons with independent thoughts and emotions. At times, personal differences arise, which can greatly compromise their marriage. Couples undergoing such troubles oftentimes separate, although legally, they are still bound together. Furthermore, social norms expect them to stay together until their marriage is annulled or until they get divorced (Glenn, p. 15).
The worries of the narrator of Gregory Corso’s “Marriage” can be clearly sourced to the fear of a failed marriage. The possibilities of getting caught in a marriage that has gone wrong are too strongly impressed on the narrator’s mind. These include financial woes and problems with his prospective wife. He even mentioned that he does not want a wife who is like her mother. In the end, he reached a point where he doubts his capacity to love and build a family. He somehow admits that he is incapable of love. It is clear to him that without love, there are no way marriages can survive, such that he even attempts to make a decision of not getting caught in a prison dream called marriage.
The only idea that I can agree with the narrator is the integral role of love in marriage. Without it, there is no point in pursuing a married life. I have relatives in broken marriages, and they almost always claim that the reason that their relationship deteriorated is that they already lost love for their partners. They also added that it all could be traced to one mistake – choosing who to marry. Very good advice they offered is to carefully choose a person to date and spend as much time together and apart before marrying. I totally agree with their suggestions since these are the only ways one can prepare for a lifetime commitment through communication and time. After all, failed marriage does not only mean lost resources and time but also lost emotional growth and opportunities towards a fulfilled and happy life.
Works Cited
Brown, S.L.“The Effect of Union Type on Psychological Well-Being: Depression Among Cohabitors versus Marrieds” Journal of Health and Social Behavior 41(2000):241-255.
Brown, S.L. & A. Booth. “Cohabitation Versus Marriage: A Comparison of Relationship Quality” Journal of Marriage and the Family 58 (1996):668-678.
Glenn, N.D. “Values, Attitudes, and the State of American Marriage” Pp. 15-33 in David Popenoe, D. Blankenhorn and J. B. Elshtain (eds.) Promises to Keep: Decline and Renewal of Marriage in America. Lanham, MD: Rowman and Littlefield, 1996.
Nock, S. L. “A Comparison of Marriages and Cohabiting Relationships.” Journal of Family Issues 16-1 (1995): 53-76.
Both the adherents and the non-adherents of religion concur that the harmony and civilization that the world has been enjoying in the past century has been possible due to organization. Standards have been set to guide and limit the ever insatiable needs of men, thereby defining laws that protect the interests of the oppressed. Laws regulate the life everywhere, for example, at homes, institutions, and even within marriages, among the others. Christians and Muslims alike consider religious rules to be divine such that no one can see the kingdom of heaven without adhering to relevant laws. This discussion focuses on the termination of marriage and the effects it has on women in both the Eastern and the Western worlds.
Scholars have defined marriage as a legally recognized relationship between a man and a woman. It permits the two parties become a husband and a wife. Divorce, on the other hand, is the official termination of a marriage by the decision of a court of law. This decision often has far-reaching consequences on both the men and the women, but most people argue that the females bear the brunt of divorce. Today, marriage and divorce go hand in hand because many marriages end up in divorce.
Unfortunately, a divorced woman is always at a disadvantage in everything she does because in most cases, she lacks the support of a male. Unlike the unmarried young woman who is easily noticeable by suitors, a divorced woman may not attract a man as easily as depicted in movies. In real life, a divorced woman has to grapple with plenty of challenges before she finds a potential partner. The challenges take a variety of forms ranging from financial constraints to intimidation by the former husband.
Without husband’s financial support, woman is often in a financial crisis, especially if there are children under her care. Typically, the average divorced woman has less money as compared to the average married woman since divorce is associated with economic vulnerability. Further, divorced women experience mental distress and psychological problems. Their physical health is in most cases poorer compared to married women. Apparently, divorce makes a woman feel hurt, lonely, and unhappy even if it was initiated by the woman. Consequently, divorced women find it hard to trust other men.
There are, however, exceptional cases in which divorce leads to a happier and healthier life for a woman. For instance, a woman who reveals from a violent marriage will experience peace, freedom, and limited restrictions. Unfortunately, these benefits can never match the adverse effects of divorce.
Islam, one of the major religions of the world, does not espouse divorce. It cautions its followers to carefully handle marriage problems and outlines the steps that spouses need to take to facilitate reconciliation should a threatening conflict arise. However, if divorce becomes inevitable, the procedure to be followed is stipulated within the Muslim doctrine. A man who divorces his wife without concrete reasons is considered a sinner because Islamic view of marriage is that it is a religious requirement to fulfill God’s purpose through man. It further stipulates that male believer’s pathway to heaven is through his parents while that of a woman is with the help of her husband.
The implication of such a claim is that a woman should try as much as possible to be in harmony with the husband to diminish chances of a divorce. Muslims have been taught to believe that of all the permitted acts, God hates divorce the most. Unfortunately, many Muslims do not adhere to these teachings. Consequently, the rights of Muslim women are violated. Only a few are allowed to complete education, besides being restricted from entering mosques.
In contrast, Western culture is the primary advocate of women empowerment, freedom, and equality. However, family relations experts caution that when there is equality in a relationship, a conflict of preferences comes into play. The Western world boasts of the largest number of educated, working women who, by virtue of their commitment to their jobs, usually fail to give adequate attention to their relationships. Consequently, the Western world registers unmatched rates of divorce. This aspect has led many to question the validity of Christianity, which is the predominant religion in the West. Intriguingly, Christianity regards marriage as an important commitment. As such, it abhors divorce. However, the vows never last causing the Western world to lead in divorce rates.
It is, therefore, evident that, besides the strict religious practices in the Muslim world, the alienation of women as far as their rights are concerned is a factor that contributes to lower rates of divorce. In contrast, the Western world has both liberated women by empowering them and also undermined one of the fundamental institutions of life, marriage. Should Muslim women be empowered educationally, it is argued that they will most likely adopt the principle of equality, thereby raising the number of divorce cases in the East. Therefore, couples should respect their marriage commitments at all times so that divorce can be eliminated from the society to minimize the challenges that women undergo.
This paper is aimed at discussing such a problem as increased rates of divorce in the United Arab Emirates. There are several reasons why this issue deserves attention. First of all, it affects a great number of families in the country. For example, in urbanized parts of the country, such as Abu Dhabai, Dubai, or Sharjah, the divorce rate amounts to approximately 33 percent (Thomas 2013, p. 16). In this case, the rate can be viewed as a ratio of divorces to the total number of marriages within a year. Admittedly, one can mention that divorce rates are lower in the Northern Emirates, such as Umm al-Quwain or Ras Al Khaima (Thomas 2013, p. 16). In particular, in these regions, the rate does not exceed 15 percent. It is, however, necessary to keep in mind the fact that the majority of the Emirati people live in highly urbanized emirates, such as Abu Dhabi, Dubai, and Sharjah. The problem therefore manifests itself at the national scale and should not be overlooked.
Furthermore, this issue should be considered because it can lead to a variety of adverse consequences. First of all, this trend can significantly impair the quality of children’s life. In particular, they may lack support that both parents should provide. Very often, children from divorced families struggle with such difficulties as divided loyalty, alienation, feeling of betrayal, and sense of insecurity (Darnall 2013, p. 138). In the future, they may find it difficult to establish relations with their peers (Darnall 2013, p. 138). Children can therefore be regarded as the major victims of divorce.
Second, the rising rates of divorce can increase immigration into the UAE. It should be mentioned that 78 percent of UAE nationals who have been divorced prefer to marry foreign women (Mornsen 2009, p. 63). In most cases, these women are financially dependent on their spouses. Moreover, divorce can be associated with such risks as drug or alcohol abuse (Darnall 2013, p. 138). One should also pay attention to such a problem as the demographic decline of the UAE population. In particular, researchers note that the mean births per women rates have decreased in the UAE from 6.4 in the seventies to 2.5 at the beginning of the twenty-first century (Thomas 2013, p. 15). This is another reason why this issue should be of great concern to policy makers.
The factors that contribute to this problem
It is possible to identify various factors that can underlie this trend. First of all, one should speak about the transformation of cultural attitudes toward marriage. In this case, much attention should be paid to the stereotypical belief according to which males should be the primary breadwinners in a family. In the past, this economic dependence often prevented women from leaving their husbands. This situation is, however, changing now. For example, researchers point out that growing employment and educational attainment among women are directly associated with the increased rates of divorce (Thomas 2013, p. 16). In particular, the rate of divorce is 47 percent among couples in which a wife has a university degree (Thomas 2013, p. 16).
Educated women believe that they can remain independent of males. In contrast, women who have only secondary education are less likely to divorce their husbands. Furthermore, it is vital to remember that a growing number of Emiratis prefer to marry foreign women. To some extent, this problem can be explained by the relatively high cost of dowry which must be given to the family of a bride (Abed, Hellyer, & Vine, 2006, p. 245). Similarly, Emiratis study and work in foreign countries, and during this time, they can marry foreigners (Mornsen 2009, p. 63). This trend increases the impact of cross-cultural differences on the life of families in the UAE. In many cases, these different attitudes toward gender roles can lead to multiple conflicts between spouses.
Additionally, it is important to speak about the growing urbanization and stressors that are associated with this process. For example, such challenges as increased traffic congestion, competitiveness in the labor market, and the need to work overtime can also contribute to conflicts within a family. One can also single out other specific events or factors that can result in divorce, for example, infidelity, loss of employment, or lack of communication between spouses.
Alternative solutions
The government can adopt several strategies in order to address this problem. First of all, public administrators should focus on the creation of family support centers in the major urban areas, such as Abu Dhabi, Dubai, and Sharjah. Such organizations should provide assistance to married people who intend to divorce. In many cases, these people cannot put themselves in the position of one another due to cultural differences (Benesh, 2008, p. 83). Additionally, such couples can be affected by such issues as work stress or different views on education of their children. Such difficulties can, however, be overcome. These spouses should be able to interact with professional family counselors who can assist them in resolving their conflicts.
For example, the experts can help couples reconcile their cultural differences (Gerstein, 2009, p. 467). Moreover, counselors can teach their clients to cope with stress. At present, many couples in the UAE cannot find such assistance. The main advantage of this alternative is that professionals will be able to find an individual approach to families. They are, therefore, more likely to find solutions that can benefit both spouses. Nevertheless, this approach has significant limitations. In particular, it does not encourage Emirati males to marry local women because they may be unwilling to pay the high cost of dowry in the UAE. They may therefore take brides from countries in which cultural norms are different. This is one of the short-comings that can be identified.
Secondly, some policy makers in the UAE emphasize the need to limit the immigration of foreign nationals into the country (Hasso, 2011, p. 7). At present, foreign women who come to the country eventually marry an Emirati. Similarly, many UAE nationals who study abroad choose to prefer to marry a foreign bride (Mornsen 2009, p. 63). As it has been said before, such spouses often have different perceptions of marriage. Some policy-makers therefore want to restrict the immigration of women whose age is lower than 30 (Hasso, 2011, p. 7). To a great extent, this policy can prompt Emiratis to marry local women since they will have fewer opportunities for taking a foreign bride. To some degree, such an approach can reduce the impact of cross-cultural conflicts on family.
This is the main advantage of the suggested alternative in comparison with the previous one. Nevertheless, this policy is not sufficient for addressing other factors that contribute to increased rates of divorce, for example, infidelity, work-related stressors, absence of communication, and so forth. They can undermine marriage even if the government offers economic assistance to Emirati families or limits the immigration into the UAE. This is the main limitation of the strategy, and it should be considered by public administrators who try to address the problem of increased divorce rates in the UAE.
There is another alternative which is available to the UAE policy makers. In particular, one should speak about monetary support that can be given to Emirati families. In this case, public administrators advocate the creation of marriage funds that are supposed to mitigate the high cost of dowry in the country (Epstein & Limage, 2008, p. 312). In other words, this approach is also supposed to encourage Emirati men to marry local women. It should be mentioned that such couples can receive financial assistance at the point when they live together for at least two years.
The main advantage of this strategy is that it minimizes the adverse effects of cross-cultural differences on family. It, however, has several important drawbacks. First of all, this policy does not mitigate other factors that can disrupt marriages. For example, one can mention infidelity or work-related issues. Secondly, this policy lays too much stress on financial assistance as one of the factors that strengthen the unity of families. Overall, the second and third alternatives are based on the premise that cross-cultural differences can be seen as the underlying causes of increased divorce rates.
Implementation
The success of the chosen alternatives depends on the implementation strategies chosen by policy makers. First, the creation of family support centers should be guided by family therapists and psychologists who understand the problems that can be faced by Emirati couples. These professionals should develop a therapy that can best fit the needs of Emirati couples. Additionally, it is important to raise people’s awareness about the assistance that these organizations can offer to them.
In other words, people should not believe that divorce is the only solution to the problems that they encounter in the course of their daily lives. This task can be viewed as the most critical one because at present, many couples do not consider the possibility of going to a family counselor. There is a significant challenge associated with the implementation of this policy. In particular, it is necessary to identify a set of standards according to which the work of such organizations can be evaluated. Furthermore, the government will have to make significant investments in order to implement this policy.
Second, the policy makers who emphasize the need to limit immigration should also focus on various aspects of their strategy implementation. First of all, they should identify a set of situations when they can deny foreign women access to the UAE. Many of them can be highly skilled professionals, and their expertise is needed by UAE companies. Public administrators must therefore first curb illegal immigration to the country because it poses a threat to the unity of many Emirati families (Hasso, 2011, p. 7). Additionally, they should not forget that many Emiratis can marry abroad, which is one of the drawbacks that should be taken into account. Policy makers should also keep in mind that by limiting immigration into the UAE, they may not prevent Emiratis from taking foreign brides. More importantly, this policy can be viewed as an infringement on the rights of the UAE citizens.
Third, it is possible to speak about financial assistance which can be offered to couples. At present, they can receive this assistance only if they live together for a certain period of time. At first, policy makers should develop a schedule for the distribution of this financial assistance. In particular, it may be provided in the course of ten or fifteen years. This decision can be explained by the need to minimize the role of monetary assistance as a form of a family tie. In this case, the main difficulty is that this approach can give rise to the misuse of governmental funds. For example, this money can be given to very prosperous people. In contrast, these funds can be better used for other purposes, such as education. This shortcoming should therefore not be overlooked by public administrators.
Overall, it is possible to argue that the first option is more preferable because it is more oriented toward individual problems faced by families. Provided that families can refer to a counselor, they will have an opportunity to cope with various stressors. Moreover, this strategy can help couples adjust to family life and understand the expectations that partners set for one another. This is the main solution that can be proposed to solve the problem of the divorce rates increase.
Reference List
Abed, I., Hellyer, P., & Vine, P. (2006). United Arab Emirates Yearboook 2006. London: Trident Press Ltd.
Benesh, G. (2008). CultureShock! UAE: A Survival Guide to Customs and Etiquette. New York, NY: Marshall Cavendish International Asia.
Darnall, P. (2008). Divorce Casualties: Keeping Your Children Close While You’re Breaking Apart. New York, NY: Taylor Trade Publications.
Epstein, I., & Limage, L. (2008). The Greenwood Encyclopedia of Children’s Issues Worldwide: North America and the Caribbean. New York, NY: Greenwood Publishing Group.
Gerstein, L. (2009). International Handbook of Cross-Cultural Counseling: Cultural Assumptions and Practices Worldwide. Boston, MA: SAGE.
Hasso, F. (2011). Consuming Desires: Family Crisis and the State in the Middle East. Palo Alto, CA: Stanford University Press.
Mornsen, J. (2009). Gender and Development. New York, NY: Routledge Thomas, J. (2013). Psychological Well-Being in the Gulf States: The New Arabia Felix. New York, NY: Palgrave Macmillan.
Divorces are socially significant actions that often have negative implications for both former families involved and society as a whole. The causes behind this social phenomenon can vary significantly, but for the sake of a deeper understanding, there is a necessity to explore some of them in-depth. One of the main causes of divorces is betrayal; another is unequal spending and earning. Exploring these causes could provide an insight into how to avoid them.
Betrayal
Betrayal or infidelity is one of the most common causes for a husband and wife to split. Infidelity for each particular person can mean a multitude of things. Some people, arguably most, define betrayal in marriage as having sex with another person. This is deeply connected with the nature and tradition of the intimate relationship between men and women. Letting another person into one’s personal space to the point of having intercourse is already an issue of deep-felt trust and having utter conviction in the other party’s genuine feelings. If a marriage partner reveals that they have had that same kind of intimacy and affection with someone else, it will definitely insult the other partner. No wonder, then, that after such an incident, the victim of infidelity would want to sever the relationship as trust is violated. At first glance, it seems understandable and logical.
There is also another explanation for such a reaction. Religious people consider the marital vow of loving and honoring each other for as long as they both live sacred; sacred as something that is witnessed, blessed, and sealed by the higher power. Such an alliance is forbidden to break by divine law. If a person decides to violate this vow, it means not only that they betrayed their partner but also that they went against God. Such an action for a deeply religious person is much more than a violation of trust. Therefore, there are not many choices left other than to drift apart.
There can also be other understandings of betrayal. Some people have more conservative views on marital fidelity and may consider even holding hands with a person of the opposite sex for a second too long to be a friendly handshake. It may not lead directly to divorce but may give grounds for monitoring each action of an allegedly cheating wife or husband. This is often considered a norm in middle-eastern countries where women are not allowed to even look at a person of the opposite sex in the eyes for too long. This is a deeply religious and cultural tradition that may not be acceptable to others. Interestingly, in some Islamic practices, men are allowed to have up to four wives, and this is not considered to be infidelity.
Additionally, people often vary in degrees of tolerance towards infidelity. Some consider it a violation of trust but not to the point of needing to end the relationship, especially if it didn’t last that long. Many people would consider writing a one-off or short-term event as a mistake, provided the circumstances did not imply serious consideration of deliberate and heartless assault on their partner’s feelings. Some people even forgive betrayal more than once or do so systematically for a number of psychological reasons. Some are very tolerant in their views on marital relationships and may even let the other party have sex with other people while not feeling betrayed at all. People in this category, with somewhat progressive or, as some may say, open-minded views are quite rare according to the author’s personal observations.
After staying in the relationship after a betrayal, most people cannot maintain the same level of emotional affection for longer than a few years. People may stay together because they have grown comfortable with each other and they are afraid of being alone again. Others demonstrate the opposite reaction and start slowly drifting towards other people in search of those sharp and intense feelings that they long for but cannot experience with the person they loved a few years back. Whatever the reasons for betrayal, be it lack of love or sexual attraction, a divorce requires the verbal or non-verbal consent of the two spousal parties.
Inequality in Spending or Earning Money
Money can also become a reason to end a marriage and go separate ways. In this case, people have not necessarily entered a relationship seeking material benefit. At least, the financial well-being of a partner was not a defining characteristic. If love was the prime reason for getting married, then money could be just an excuse and a valid reason for not verbalizing the absence of feelings. People often tend to avoid upsetting their loved ones or the people they care about by not telling them the hard truth. However, divorce can often be accompanied by a long period of mutual accusations and even legal actions against one another in an attempt to retain a larger part of the matrimonial property. After seeing this happen, it can be hard to believe that these people ever loved each other.
There are also cases when people who were committed to building a career and have remained single into their thirties or even forties. Such people can be inexperienced in building a long-lasting relationship and are accustomed to a standard of living. Entering marriage late for such people may mean a rapid shift from a relatively calm and steady lifestyle into a costly endeavor as the needs of two people differ from just having to consider themselves. Frequently, divorce happens when people marry hastily, not having lived together long enough to grow accustomed to each other’s lifestyles. Another reason for money-based divorces could be one-sided love. An aged man or a woman with a considerable fortune could fall in love with a younger person who has deceitful intentions of waiting for their elder partner to die and pretend to be caring and loving enough to be mentioned in their will. An end to such relationships is often brought about by ‘failed’ acting or the elder partner following the advice from a close friend.
There are also situations when people end relationships because they do not consider themselves equal partners. For some people, marriage is not only about love and affection but also financial equality. Men often feel uneasy to earn less than their wives. Although this may not be discussed between the two, marriages sometimes become a topic of external discussion and gossip can make a proud man feel miserable in his relationship to the point he cannot see any positive side. The situation is often aggravated by the fact that men do not like to bring up such deep topics for discussion, and prefer to let things build up. This unhealthy pride, with gossip as a stimulating factor, could sever a marriage that otherwise could be happy.
Another side of this issue could entail a wife being dissatisfied with her husband earning low wages or a husband discontented with his wife’s excessive spending. These are clichés that are often seen on TV and read in books; the roles can be opposite too. Nonetheless, the disparity in earnings and spending between partners can become an issue that threatens a relationship. Marriage can be viewed as a union where each side is equal in everything. It would be safe to assume that each partner should contribute to keeping the flame within the family hearth either ‘by labor or by coin’ but in equal amount nonetheless. When contributions cannot be measured and compared in dollar equivalent, there may arise a question of equality that quickly becomes a fight over money and contribution.
Conclusion
There is a myriad of reasons for divorce. They may be well-established and evidenced with facts of infidelity or bank statements. However, a divorce still remains an act between two people who united for some reason in the past, who now wish to go their separate ways. For one party, it may seem a relief, for the other it is misfortune. Having analyzed two possible causes of divorce, it occurred to me that the underlying reason for divorce is a change in one of the partners or both of them. If marriage is a union of two people who found something that unites them, makes them similar, then it is some drastic difference that draws them apart. Thus, marriage depends on the ability to settle differences through conversation or frequent contemplation on the things that unite two people.
One of the main reasons why God created human beings was to ensure that all that He had created was taken care of. This was possible through man’s reproduction to fill the world through various generations.
Since creation took place many people have used marriage as a way or reproducing to ensure human beings do not become extinct on earth. However, not all marriages last until death separates the couples as they are intended to. This essay aims at discussing the causes and effects of divorce in most marriages.
Divorce is defined as a permanent separation between a man and a woman who were initially married to each other. This means that when a man and woman divorce they no longer live together and have the right to get married to any other person (Stewart 7). However, divorce can be reversed when couples decide they want to get together.
The most common reason why many marriages do not last for long is infidelity by one or both partners. When a man and woman fall in love they devote all their love and energy to ensure that their relationship lasts for as long as they are alive. However, some people become tempted along the way and start having extramarital affairs with their neighbors, workmates or family friends.
Whenever such acts are uncovered by the other partner divorce becomes inevitable. Infidelity makes many marriages to break due to the fact that the person being cheated on feels that all the commitments and sacrifice made to ensure the marriage lasts are betrayed.
It also makes them feel worthless compared to the other person being courted. Infidelity breeds mistrust and the possibility of contracting sexually transmitted infections and this makes many people to prefer divorce than go through these painful moments.
Drug abuse has also led to many divorce cases as couples addicted to drugs become irresponsible and careless with regard to their personal lives and the welfare of their families.
Many people do not tolerate extreme use of drugs at the expense of their families and whenever such behavior is not changed divorce becomes the next alternative (Stewart 12). Drug addiction leads to financial constraints, domestic violence, health complications and possibility of contracting sexually transmitted infections that many people will not tolerate hence demand for separation or divorce.
Extreme poverty has also led to many marriages to break as means of survival become very limited. Most couples especially those who do not have children prefer divorcing as this offers higher chances of one being able to meet his/her needs compared to when they are together.
Unemployment due to retrenchment, end of contracts, drug abuse or misuse of office can also result to divorce since most people who are dependent on one person for basic needs like clothing and shelter decide to look for someone who has the means to provide these basic needs.
Infertility has also made many people to divorce as they look for partners who are able to give them children or conceive. The desire to have children running around the house making noise while playing motivates many people to make very hasty decisions and abandon their spouses who are not able to conceive or make their women pregnant for those considered fertile.
Any family without a child is normally considered by the society to be heading for a dead end and to avoid this situation they ensure they look for partners who they will raise children with.
Many people rush to marry without having sufficient information regarding who they are marrying. After marriage many couples will discover that their partners are not the way they thought they were before getting married.
Every issue becomes the opposite of what they had anticipated and eventually all their needs, wishes, demands, tastes and preferences become unmatched. They start feeling their partners are giving them a lot of stress and discomfort and their relationship ends up being very shaky as their personalities are totally incompatible resulting to divorce.
Whenever a couple divorces on grounds of infidelity, drug abuse or infertility the partner who is a victim here develops a negative perception regarding his/her personality (Stewart 34). They feel inferior and less worth compared to their partners and the society.
Therefore, they start to feel that their value in society is too little that no one seems to recognize and appreciate them. The fact that someone has given another all their trust and hope only to be divorced later means that all the sacrifices and commitments made were never appreciated.
Some partners get married and decide to resign from their jobs in order to commit themselves fully to their marriages and families. They decide to be housewives and take care of their husbands and children while they go to work. Some men have also been forced to abandon their jobs and dedicate their lives to their children and wives.
However, when the marriages of such people fail to work and they get divorced it becomes very difficult for them to get access to basic needs. The possibility of them having made some savings during their short lived marriages is almost zero since they were fully dependent on their spouses. The probability of them getting back their previous jobs is zero and making new applications for jobs may take too long before being successful.
Stress and depression is one of the most common effects evident in people who have divorced. It is very difficult to comprehend the fact that someone is no longer living with the person they used to live and sleep with for the past few years. When people get married and stay with each other for several years they begin to become part of their spouses and start living their lives (Stewart 66).
The fact that someone is being separated from his/her long time companion is a bitter truth to live with. After divorce some people experience serious instances of stress and depressions that threaten their health if not checked in time.
Despite the fact that divorce is activated by one or both parties in marriage children suffer most in these families. This is due to the fact that most children do not understand the reason why their parents divorce after bringing them up successfully (Stewart 108). When provision of basic needs is cut due to divorce children will be subjected to malnutrition or poor living standards that compromise their health and education.
When parents go their own ways children are left in the middle of the tussle and are unable to decide whether to follow their mother or father. Children who are brought up with one parent face various challenges as far as discipline, food, shelter and entertainment are concerned.
Conclusion
Divorce is very common in the modern society due to the above mentioned reasons. However, if all attempts to save a relationship fail it is better for a person to divorce and get rid of a risky marriage than waste their lives in them.
Works Cited
Stewart, Alison. Divorce: Causes and Consequences (Current Perspectives in Psychology). New Haven: Yale University Press, 2007. Print.
The paper at hand discusses the problem of family relations aligning the course materials to the selected letter from the “Dear Abby” rubric. The problems brought up in the letter are interconnected with three modules from the course: parenting, divorce, and dating.
Every piece of advice that Abby gives in her response will be examined through the lens of the acquired knowledge. Hence, there is an opportunity to apply the theoretical materials to the practical recommendations provided by the psychologist and test the validity of the latter. The course materials are expected to assist in performing a critical analysis of Abby’s advice.
Background
The letter under analysis is written by a single-parent mother who is concerned about the behavior of her ex-husband. The latter changes girlfriends on a regular basis and introduces them to the sons each time. The woman is worried that his private life affects her children negatively. The psychologist, Abby, criticizes the man’s behavior, pointing out that he sets a negative example. She is convinced that the father should be involved in the sons’ lives and interests rather than involve them in his relationships. This material has been selected for the analysis as it is associated with several course topics at once.
Body
The first point that should be necessarily elucidated in the context of the discussed problem is parenting. A large scope of the course materials was devoted to the role of the father in child-rearing practice. Hence, it is recommended that the father is involved in children’s lives and participates in the important activities such as school performances and conferences. In the meantime, the described situation reveals a contrary situation – the father gets his sons involved in those activities that are important to him, i.e. the dates with his girlfriends. From this perspective, Abby offers a rational advice suggesting that the father should not mix his private life with the time that he is supposed to spend on his children and their interests.
Another aspect associated with parenting is the single-parent family format. As it might be understood from the context, the children are raised by their single mother. The course materials suggest that despite the fact that single mothers receive more governmental help, they tend to receive less emotional support and sympathy from their friends and acquaintances. The analyzed letter shows that the mother is at a loss, and apart from the practical advice, she might search for some comforting that Abby fails to provide. The psychologist focuses specifically on the mother’s question neglecting the opportunity to encourage the woman.
The second point that should be discussed in the context of this problem is divorce. According to the course materials, one of the main objectives that the divorcing parents need to set is the children’s adjustment. The latter is determined by different factors including the lack of hostility between ex-spouses. The analyzed letter shows that the woman is evidently dissatisfied with her ex-husband’s behavior, i.e. with his habit of changing girlfriends and introducing each of them to the children. Meanwhile, it is important to distinguish between the woman’s sincere concern and her personal sense of insult. The latter might provoke her to involve the children in the conflict that is undesirable from the point of their adjustment to the post-divorce environment. Abby’s advice does not cover this aspect, even though it seems to be critical.
Moreover, it should be pointed out that the woman’s letter does not provide any hints at the children’s frustration with the situation. Upon the examination of the woman’s complaints, it might appear that it is she who is stressed about the husband’s behavior most of all. In the meantime, the course materials suggest considering the positive side of the parent’s remarriage. Even though the father is not actually remarried, he has new relationships and welcomes the children to become a part of them. According to the course materials, new family members are likely to have a positive impact – children have one more adult to turn for help. From this perspective, Abby’s analysis of the problem is incomplete – it puts a particular emphasis on the negative side, overlooking potential positive outcomes.
The final problem related to the course materials that might be found in the analyzed letter is dating and intimacy. The children’s father illustrates the pattern of cohabiting to their children, so there is a strong possibility that they are likely to adopt this manner of relationships as the only right variant. In the meantime, the course materials point out that cohabiting reduces the chances of building up strong and healthy family relations. From this standpoint, Abby’s recommendations are reasonable as she concentrates on the negative relationship model that the children’s father provides.
Conclusion
The course materials turned out to be highly helpful for the problem’s analysis. First and foremost, they helped to identify the scope of the problem and the key areas of concern – the poor model of relationships that the father demonstrates, the risk of children’s involvement in the ex-spouses’ conflict, and the post-divorce environment that is negative for the children’s adjustment. Therefore, the course materials helped to find the flaws in the psychologist’s recommendations, i.e. to identify the gaps in her response. The selected problem is complex and interesting from the psychological perspective, while Abby’s response appears incomplete.