A Family Anticipating: Young Children

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Interpretation of observations about theory

My focus child is a young girl expecting the birth of her first sibling. Such change in her life has several implications in her place in the family and her role as the only child and future older sister.

Much can be reflected from the attachments established between a child and the significant people in her life. Several factors may affect such attachment. In the case of my focus child, the fact that she will soon cease to be an only child and the hormonal changes that affect her pregnant mother’s emotional states may threaten whatever secure attachment she may be enjoying at present.

Infants are given the opportunities to form attachments, be they secure or insecure ones, become attached to the person very familiar to them. Most of the time, it is their mothers (Small, 1998). Children remain attached to their mothers or significant caregiver even if their attachment becomes insecure due to abuse or battering.

A sensitive mother helps her child feel secure and a less attentive mother engenders insecurity. In the first few years of life, a child with a secure attachment can learn how to balance separation and reunion. He is unafraid when he is separated from her, trusting that she will be back for him. On the other hand, a child with an insecure attachment to his mother manifests panic, anger, and a desperate search for her, thinking that she will never come back. When the mother returns, a host of responses may be observed of the child. Some children would be delighted and warmly embrace the parent; others would appear to be indifferent, withdrawn, hostile, uncertain, or confused. The kind of response the child had led the psychological observers to develop the attachment categories of secure, avoidant, ambivalent, and disorganized (Small, 1998).

Some factors that may disrupt the synchronicity of a mother and child may be mismatches between the temperaments. Clashing temperaments may create tension in the bond between mother and child. “Temperament is a biological predisposition towards behaving in certain characteristic ways. The mixture of the disposition of mother and child then is where biology and experience interconnect” (Small, 1998). In my focus child’s case, her mother’s pregnancy symptoms may be a cause of emotional upheaval affecting the child.

Another source of tension or ambivalence in the mother-child bond is a mother’s inconsistency in giving due attention to her child. When a crucial change takes place such as the birth of a sibling a child reacts by seeking the attention he used to enjoy constantly. Since children are not pleased with the change in their mother’s treatment of them, they resort to attention-seeking behaviors that are not pleasant most of the time, hence, ensuing stress and tension in the mother-child relationship (Small, 1998).

Hence, it is sufficient to say that attachment is crucial to the emotional development of the child. Other theorists have attempted to explain how children cope with different situations. Erik Erikson developed his theory of Psychosocial Development which attempts to explain personality growth by describing how people respond to various conflicts that they may face in specific periods in their lives (Giorgins, & Glazer, 2008).

The focus child in this study is in the early childhood stage. Psychosocial Development theory, falls under two stages. According to Erikson, during the ages of 2 and 3, children struggle for autonomy. The conflict is between autonomy and doubt (Giorgins & Glazer, 2008). Toddlers show their need for independence from their parent or caregiver by trying to do things on their own, but on the other hand, harbor some fear if they can do it. Children aged 3-6 fall under the Initiative vs. Guilt stage. In this stage, preschoolers are so into doing things on their own and showing everyone how much they have grown in many ways. Thus, they initiate help. However, at this stage, children may be awkward, and their good intentions may backfire as in destroying some things in the process. When this happens, they are overcome with guilt.

It is important to understand where the child from all angles to plan the best intervention for her.

Action plan

Family support

Being an only child in the family since she was born and now faced with the reality of having a sibling may feel like a threat to my focus child’s secured position in the family. The child in this situation may undergo a lot of stress. Neurobiological research addresses how stress can have a great impact on brain development (Sims, 2008). The child needs to be able to overcome any stress and anxiety she may be experiencing about the birth of the new baby & when the child is born then this will have a positive impact on her future development and help her to deal positively with stressful situations in later life.

So far, the focus child’s family is doing well in helping her understand upcoming changes in her life as a future big sister. She is made aware of how the baby inside her mother’s womb is growing, as she is included in doctor’s visits.

As the time gets nearer and nearer for her sibling to be born, it would greatly help if she is brought along in stores while shopping for baby things. Her opinion may be asked as to her choices in color or design in the baby’s things, as well as the nursery being prepared if any. It is important that she feels she is part of the preparation process and that she is consulted with some ideas.

Best of all, she needs to be constantly reassured that she is very much loved no matter what and her place as the first and oldest child in the family will only be hers and no one else’s. That makes her very special and unique and it would greatly help her self-esteem to know it.

Group care program

In the daycare, books on family should abound. Her carers should read books to her every day, especially with themes on the expectance of a new baby. Many books focus on the thoughts and feelings that children undergo when a new baby is added to their family – excitement, jealousy at losing their parents’ attention to the baby, frustration that the baby cannot do anything much with them, and the like. The books also show how children resolve these issues. Such coping mechanisms must be implanted in my focus child as early as before the baby arrives so she is well-prepared.

Forming stronger emotional bonds with my focus child must also be the goal of her carers. Howes et al (cited in Hutchins & Sims 1999, p.130) state that ‘infants who have secure attachments to their caregivers are advantaged in terms of developmental outcomes, play and interactions’. Erikson (cited in Hutchins & Sims 1999, p. 125) also talks about why attachment is so important in the early years stating that ‘learning to have confidence in the adults around them is an essential stage in development. My focus child has developed multiple attachments. Some studies indicate that children who have multiple attachments have faster growth rates, Hardy refers to multiple attachments as alloparents (Sims 2009).

Bronfenbrenner & Nevile (1994 cited in Hutchins & Sims 1999: xx) state that ‘strong attachments that are characterized by reciprocal activity enhance the young child’s responsiveness to his or her environment and influence the child’s motivation to explore, manipulate, elaborate and imagine’.

She needs supportive people to lean on when she would feel that she is “dethroned”. Her self-esteem needs to be assured that she remains special no matter who comes to their family and that she will retain her position, and even be promoted to an older sister, now responsible for a helpless baby.

Nixon and Gould (1996, p.110) state “the development of self-concept impacts on other aspects of the toddler’s social and emotional self, such as play. Children begin to play out experiences they’ve had or witnessed, to deepen their understanding of these situations”. The daycare center should be able to take advantage of children’s play situations to be able to observe how my focus child is coping with the upcoming changes in her life. Providing puppets to let her express her inner emotions by pretending one puppet is the baby and the other is her may let her vent out her feelings to the coming baby. This may also be done by using the other puppet as one of her parents. Other play ideas would be providing her with play baby things so that she can “practice” being a big sister by feeding dolls, giving them baths, or walking them in baby carriages. In these pretend play activities, she would develop good self-esteem that she is going to be an efficient big sister someday.

Discussion

A family anticipating a huge change can bring about stress to everybody. In particular, young children who have a limited understanding of what is happening around them may manifest various behaviors and maybe a change in disposition in finding an outlet for the stress. In most cases, one’s emotional strength and the attachments established to significant persons in one’s life are relied on to cope with the stress.

My focus child’s parents have been including her in their preparation for such change by bringing her to doctor’s appointments with them and involving her by educating her of the progression of the pregnancy. Likewise, her parents have sought the cooperation of her daycare center in preparing her for the huge life change coming ahead for her. “There is a growing body of evidence that parents need the support of a third party if they are to establish and sustain nurturing relationships with their children” (Bronfenbrenner & Neville, 1994 quoted in Hutchins & Sims 1999: 29). To maintain a secure and nurturing relationship with their child this family is utilizing the support of the carers at the child care center. With regards to Bronfenbrenner’s (1979) ecological systems theory, the case shows that within this child’s Microsystem adults are being responsive to this child’s needs.

About the Mesosystem in this situation this child’s parents and carers are demonstrating effective communication, sharing the news of the pregnancy. They are working together to include and prepare this child for the birth of her first sibling. Since the child attends care three times a week, this service has and is utilizing the valuable opportunity to support this child’s development and needs. As within the Exosystem, this child may be impacted by the workload and hours of her parent’s work. Hence the support of attending care three days a week would assist in supporting this child’s needs and in preparation for this change.

In being able to bring along the focus child to her mother’s doctor appointments, the health system and society show that they allow and involve children to be part of the pregnancy and birth process with their families. Therefore, the Macrosystem is supporting this child’s needs and family goals.

My focus child is very fortunate to have all the support she needs in this phase of her life when she needs to deal with change. Both home and daycare centers efficiently work together to prepare her for the coming of her first sibling. Communication between the two social circles is essential, as stated in (Huntchins & Sims 1999:28-29), developing partnerships with parents is crucial in the well-being of the child, providing families with the support of a third party. This is demonstrated in the support that the carers are providing the child, by allowing her opportunities to foster the child’s strengths and needs in her social and emotional development.

Indeed, this focus child is on her way to a bright future as a loving big sister from a supportive and caring family!

Reference

Bronfenbrenner, U. (1979) The Ecology of Human Development. Cambridge: Harvard University Press.

Giorgins, C. & Glazer, J. (2008). Literature for Young Children: Supporting Emergent Literacy Ages 0-8 (6th edition). Boston: Pearson, Educational, Inc.

Hutchins, T. & Sims, M. (1999) Program Planning for Infants and Toddlers, Prentice Hall, Australia.

Nixon, D. & Gould, K. (1999) Emerging Child Development in the First Three Years, Social Science Press, Katoomba NSW

Sims, M. (2008) Applying Neurobiological evidence in caring for infants and toddlers, DVD.

Sims, M. (2009) Caring for young children: What children need. Policy Brief 15. Centre for Community Health.

Sims, M. (2009) EDEC340 Young Children Developing and Learning Topic Notes, University of New England

Small, M. (1998) Our Babies, Ourselves : How Biology and Culture Shape the Way we Parent, New York : Anchor Books

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