The Concept and Aspects of Remarriage

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Introduction

Remarriage is when individuals get married for a second or subsequent time. When a marriage does not work, couples often end up divorcing, and some of them end up remarrying. Remarriage, however, rigs up adjustment questions, especially when two existing families are combined.

This paper aims to describe remarriage under the following subheadings:

types of remarried couples;
remarriage demographics;
quality of remarriage;
unresolved issues;
childrens adjustment;
challenges in remarriage;
myths of remarriage.

Categories of Remarried Couples

The hostile-detached couples are unhappy and often end up divorcing (Viscuso, 2018). The validating couples mostly interact in a relaxed, calm way though they become emotional at times. Volatile couples are mostly emotional over any familial issue (Viscuso, 2018). The conflict avoiders barely raise issues and concentrate on discussing agreements when they have a major disagreement. The hostile detached couples always fight with no winner.

The hostile couples are mostly unhappy, while the validating, volatile, and Conflict-Avoiding couples are happy, but none of these are likely to divorce.

Demographics of Remarriage

From 1950 to 2017, the rate of remarriage decreased in both men and women. The rate of remarriage was 90.9 in 1950, but in 2017, it was 38.8 per 1000 married men (Schweizer, 2019). The decrease in the rate of remarriage is directly proportional to the rising age of marriage. The womens age of remarriage has increased from 34 years in 1950 to 43 years in 2017 (Schweizer, 2019). The mens remarriage median age has risen from 40 years in 1950 to 46 years in 2017.

Continuation

The first-marriage nuclear family members comprise the biological parents and their respective adopted or blood-related dependent children. The new household will be incomplete as it stands in the remarriage case since the other biological parent lives outside it and must be included within the overall system (Thorsen & Sawyer, 2020).

As a result, the extension of the boundary will lead to some family members feeling excluded.

Myths of Remarriage

The version of this second remarriage myth can take several forms.

The forms may include:

Always put your marriage first,
Always put yourself first,
Always consider yourself and your children first,
Always put the other person first,
Always consider everybody first.

These myths may force one to act differently leading to miscommunication between partners thereby leading to quarrels (Thorsen & Sawyer, 2020). Individuals that had limited financial resources as single parents may feel deprived.

Concentrate on the positive and keep criticism to oneself

This myth originates in the desperate feeling that the first marriages success is necessary. Some remarried couples believe that they might still be married if they abided by this myth (Thorsen & Sawyer, 2020). Since prodding and poking might uncover a fatal flaw, the marriage remains static and frozen.

Focusing on what went wrong in the past

This myth advocates denial and pseudo-mutuality instead of honest communication. Instead of building a healthy, unique, and new relationship, it reconstructs the old one to get it to work. A corollary myth encourages families to focus on the future and condemns the past (Thorsen & Sawyer, 2020). Subsequently, the open communication needed to sustain a healthy relationship is restricted.

Whatever Is Mine Belongs To Me and Whatever Is Yours Is Yours

At no point is ours acknowledged, which is a cornerstone of family life.

Qualities of Remarriage

Even though some studies find no differences between remarried and first-married couples, other studies show lower quality relationships in remarried couples compared to the first marriages (Jelvani et al., 2018).

Marital relationships are poorer when both spouses are stepparents compared to families containing only one spouses children. Emotional attachment to a previous spouse is also associated with lower marital satisfaction (Jelvani et al., 2018).

Remarried couples are more willing to discuss their marital problems than first-married ones.

Unresolved Issues From First Marriage

Boiling Over

If individuals opt to ignore the issues bothering them and push them aside, one person might leave the relationship instead of talking them over.

This will have negative consequences since a person with unsolved issues will be caught unaware and their partner might leave them (Thorsen & Sawyer, 2020).

Individual risks have far more pronounced issues if they are not resolved in time, causing more damage than expected.

External Blame

People often blame others for the way they feel due to these unsolved issues. For instance, if one feels unhappy because a former partner cheated on them in the past, the cheated person could blame this unhappiness on other various factors (Jelvani et al., 2018). They may continue to attribute their disillusionment to simple current problems, whereas, in reality, it stems from the past major issue that remains unsolved.

Adjustment of Children

Children are the most vulnerable after a divorce or a remarriage. Their parents tend to overestimate their childrens emotional resilience and adaptation. Divorce or remarriage can cause emotional suffering, including:

demandingness,
resentment,
anxiety,
depression,
anger,
anxiety,
depression,
non-compliance (Thorsen & Sawyer, 2020).

The impact of marital transitions on children is most evident in the academic, social attainment, externalizing behavior, and social responsibility domains.

Conclusion

After divorce, some couples end up remarrying for a second or subsequent period. It has become a culture as many marriages may have one or both partners remarried.

References

Jelvani, R., Etemadi, O., Jazayeri, R., & Fatehizade, M. (2018). Difficulties in Emotion Regulation among Iranian Remarried Women: The role of mindfulness, thoughtaction fusion, and emotion regulation. Journal of Divorce & Remarriage, 60(2), 89-103. Web.

Schweizer, V. (2019). The Retreat from Remarriage, 1950-2017. Web.

Thorsen, M., & Sawyer, E. (2020). Divorce and remarriage. The Encyclopedia Of Child And Adolescent Development, 1-10. Web.

Viscuso, P. (2018). Oikonomia: Divorce and remarriage in the Eastern Orthodox tradition by Kevin Schembri. Journal Of Orthodox Christian Studies, 1(1), 116-118. Web.

Zahl-Olsen, R., Thuen, F., & Espehaug, B. (2019). Divorce and remarriage in Norway: A prospective cohort study between 1981 and 2013. Journal of Divorce & Remarriage, 60(8), 600-611. Web.

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