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ABSTRACT
The focus of this study involves the study of sibling relationship and its impact on individual behaviour. Sibling relationships are authentic and makes a huge difference and change in the behaviour and attitude of people. The main objective behind the research was to understand their bond and relationship among them. To know how they treat each other hand to know which sibling relationship combination (two brothers, two sisters, one brother and one sister, or a single child) they think are the best in a family.
INTRODUCTION
Each of two or more children having one or both parents in common are stated to siblings. Then they can in any term like two brothers, two sisters or a brother or a sister. Sibling relationships are authentic. As suggested by Voor postel and Vander Lippe (2007), sibling relationships can be one of the most long lasting and enduring relationships of an individual. Often siblings grow up in the same environment; they share the same parents and also share common memories and similar experience. At very initial stage of their life enduring their childhood they are guided and guarded by their parents and so most of the parents want nothing more than their children to get along and have a secure life.
As they spend too much time with each other throughout their childhood, it helps in the child’s development, it also benefits them in having healthy sibling relationship which then makes them first supportive friend to each other. The relationship or bond between siblings is different during different stages of their life (Different in childhood different among adults, different among teenage, etc).They might get too close to each other by sharing their private life, helping each other in solving the problems and motivating each other to do better. They might have clashes, disagreement or arguments with each other due to difference in opinion, perspective, standard of living of each other.
Their relationship also gets different when they have their partner, their own house, their children or sometimes due to transfer due to job. So let us see how an adult in todays world handles his/her sibling relationship. Siblings are a fixture in the family lives of children and adolescents, and a body of work documents their role in one another’s everyday experiences as companions, confidantes, combatants, and as the focus of social comparisons.
REVIEW OF LITERATURE
Cole, A. K., & Kearns, K. A. (2001) were of the opinion that the quantity of research on the quality of sibling relationships was inadequate. Therefore, it could be recommended that sibling relationships should be examined in terms of various age groups and different variables, and their psycho social consequences should be subject to research. Moreover, developmental results of sibling relationships could be examined through longitudinal studies. Studies on the relation between sibling relationships and family relationships under various parenthood styles could be recommended.
Widmer, E. D., & Weiss, C. C. (2000) identifies in the research that female students who were first in birth order had lower life satisfaction, less positive attitude toward sibling relationships, and higher levels of loneliness than female students who were second in birth order. As for male students, no significant difference was observed between them in terms of the effect of birth order on life satisfaction and attitude toward sibling relationships.
OBJECTIVES OF THE STUDY
Following are the objectives of the study:
- To know the relationship between siblings from adult.
- To understand the impact of sibling relationship on an individual behaviour.
- To identify the behavioural change in individual due to sibling relationship.
- To suggest and conclude with the relationship and the bonding among siblings.
HYPOTHESES
- There is a strong bond among siblings.
- Parents treat siblings differently.
RESEARCH METHODOLOGY
The research is descriptive and qualitative in nature. The researcher has used primary and secondary data where primary data includes questionnaire and secondary method includes books, websites and journals. A questionnaire consists of 12 questions covering demographics and views of individual to understand the bond among siblings. There were 60 respondents all together. The sampling method used was judgemental and percentage method is used analysis and interpretation of data. A percentage method and graphs are used to analysis and interpret the data.
SIBLING REALTIONSHIP
Sibling plays a vital role in everyone’s life. Sibling is the one on whom one can vouch upon and thus simulates a different bond altogether. Every individual has a unique relationship with their sibling. Some of them are very comfortable just like pals and some are not that close but still they have concern and connection with each other. Although, siblings grow up in the same environment, share the same parents, and share common memories and similar experiences but the behaviour and attitude may vary with each other. Today children have started staying in isolation because of increase in nuclear family.
Sibling relationships are an integral part of the family system. Parents may influence their children’s interpersonal relationships directly by giving them advice and intervening in their interactions and disputes or indirectly by modelling social behaviour of their children’s emotions and behaviours. With the advent of adulthood, relationships with the family undergo transformations. Emerging adults, at least in Western cultures, are expected to develop higher levels of individuation, displayed in the capacity to rely on oneself and to make independent decisions and follow through with them. Thus, a positive family atmosphere is likely to be related to warm sibling relationships, whereas a distressed atmosphere will probably be related to negative sibling relationships. In contrast, parental assertion of power was related to a higher frequency of conflict between siblings.
SUGGESTIONS
Based on the responses and one to one interactions that researcher had with respondents, following conclusion is framed in six different combinations:
- Insecurity: When siblings are of same gender, there is always a comparison between two. This may lead to “insecurity” between the sisters. Two sisters may share their secrets with each other but somewhere they may also have the feeling of jealousy with each other. As they grow, insecurity may also lead to conflict.
- Internal conflicts: It is considered to have a proud feeling for every parents to have sons but as and when they grow they start competing with each other. Therefore, they may have internal conflicts with each other. Most of boys are concerned about their family but they do not show. Hence, even there is a spark of conflict at the childhood stage, they may not solve it but it turns into “Internal Conflict”.
- Mental obligation: When there is a combination of one brother and many sisters there is a feeling of mental obligation towards their family and especially towards sisters. Though today scenario is changed, girls can take their own responsibility but still a brother has to fulfil his responsibility towards his sister and family. The boy may be pampered by his parents but they cannot forget to fulfil their duties towards their daughter.
- Protective: When there are more than 2 brothers and a single sister, brothers act protective towards their sister. There are chances that the girl can be pampered and therefore may not be given lot of freedom. Among brothers there can be understanding or internal conflicts depending upon the attitude and behaviours of boys.
- Bonding: It is observed that there is a good bonding between brother and sister. They can understand each other well and discuss their secrets, consult each other at the time of taking important decisions. This mainly happens because there is no comparison between two separate genders. Hence, parents also prefer to have a combination of brother and sister.
- Sharing: Although there is a good bonding between brother and sister but when the number is more they believe in sharing too. Around, 15 to 20 years ago every couple use to have 3 to 4 children and they had a habit of sharing their things like books, clothes etc. Alongwith, materialistic things sharing of secrets were very common.
Exceptions to the above outcomes
- It depends upon the age gap between siblings.
- The upbringing of parents and the way children are treated by their parents.
- The attitude, behaviour and maturity of an individual may vary.
SUGGESTIONS
- The first step to establish a healthy sibling relationship is to heal the past or to release the baggage from childhood. Although there could be some small fights during childhood but later it must get converted into memories.
- Have a discussion regarding the problems or difficult of day to day life. A transparency in the relationship plays an important role to build a healthy relationship and understanding among siblings.
- The habit of sharing and caring must be inculcated among siblings for each other from childhood itself.
- One must try and avoid controversial issues among siblings. It is easily possible when a older sibling shows the maturity to understand younger one and the younger one obeys or follows older one. Though it is not professional it is always a give and take in relationship.
- Appreciating each other’s performance and taking criticism positively will help them to have a long term relationship and perform well in their life.
CONCLUSION
As the respondents are adults and the age gap between them is maximum 4 years. Out of the total respondents the combination of one brother and one sister sibling relationship is higher as compare to other two combinations. The trend is changing as the families are getting converted into nuclear rather than joint. It is been observed through the study that 86% of the respondents stay with their siblings and 17% of the respondents are been treated like a friend by their siblings.
Through the sources it is been observed that siblings always protect them from parents and keep their secrets or private life safe. Some of the respondents staying away from their sibling do contact their siblings on daily basis. It is been revealed that 75% of the respondents fight a lot with their siblings and still they have a strong bond with their siblings. Around 70% of the respondents miss the presence if their siblings very much when their sibling (he/she) is not around. The study indicates that 65% of the respondents get the amount of respect they deserve from their siblings. In spite of having fight or disagreement adults still manages to stay together, respect each other, have a daily conversation and maintain their bond strongly.
REFERENCE
- Brody, G. H., & Murry, V. M. (2001). Sibling socialization of competence in rural, single-parent African American families. Journal of Marriage and Family, 63, 996-1008.
- Bouchey, H. A., Shoulberg, E. K., Jodl, K. M., & Eccles, J. S. (2010). Longitudinal links between older sibling features and younger siblings’ academic adjustment during early adolescence. Journal of Educational Psychology, 102, 197–211.
- Cole, A. K., & Kearns, K. A. (2001). Perceptions of sibling qualities and activities of early adolescents. Journal of Early Adolescence, 21, 204-227.
- Criss, M. M., & Shaw, D. S. (2005). Sibling relationships as contexts for delinquency training in low-income families. Journal of Family Psychology, 19, 592–600
- Widmer, E. D., & Weiss, C. C. (2000). Do older siblings make a difference? The effects of older sibling support and older sibling adjustment on the adjustment of socially disadvantaged adolescents. Journal of Research on Adolescence, 10, 1-27.
- https://www.ucy.ac.cy/nursery/documents/Sibling_Relation.pdf
- https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/pdf/10.1177/0743558404271133
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