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A child not having their father in his or her life is sad, but it does not doom a person forever. Having a biological father does not equate to success. A single mother can raise a successful child. For example, Barack Obama, his father left him, but he held the most powerful position in the United States and did not have a father in the home as a grown-up. Obama is close to his mother and he does not feel the need for a father figure. This shows that fathers are not a need and many successful people grow up without a father. A child needs his or her mother, showing the mother-child relationship gives the kids a sense of confidence and responsibility, and how mothers build resilience. Fathers could put children at risk.
Children primarily need a mother, not a father. A biological father may not be in a child’s life for several reasons. These reasons include but are not limited to: “Four percent of fathers are incarcerated, twenty-six of fathers are emotionally absent, and fifteen of fathers deserted their child” (Babul and Lusine, 9-10). When children do not have a father figure, they need someone to look up to and guide them down the straight and narrow. Mother is the perfect candidate for this position. A mother can give you the love of no other person and advice that will help you throughout life. But despite that, children can be successful and survive with the guidance of his or her mother. It’s the mother’s inclination to care for the body from birth.
A child needs a mother’s touch such as for breastfeeding. Quest et al. note that, finally, other research has shown that breastfeeding mother-infant dyads spend significantly more time in mutual gaze during feedings than bottle dyads. This proves that babies need their mothers. If a mother breastfeeds her child, the child already has a strong bond. Quest et al. indicate: “And when you cuddle and smell each other it leads to an oxytocin surge which, as we’ve already discovered, helps with bonding and breastfeeding” (‘Breastfeeding and Bonding with Your Newborn’). There is a genuine connection between the mother and the child.
Being raised by a single mother can build resilience. Children who were raised by a single-mother build survival skills. Based on the definition from Dictionary.com, resilience means the capacity to recover quickly from difficulties; toughness. Researchers have identified general vulnerabilities that single mothers experience, with far fewer exploring how negative pathways can be disrupted or examining resilience factors. Furthermore, because single-mother families are most often compared to two-parent families, researchers continue to highlight a deficit model rather than exploring within-group differences that would emphasize strengths in single-mother households that could be used in intervention efforts (Murry et al., 2001; Taylor & Conger, 2014). Resilience researchers have demonstrated that positive outcomes are possible for children exposed to even extreme stressors and hardships; and a consistent finding is that having a competent, warm parent promotes healthy developmental trajectories and protects children from maladjustment despite adversities (Masten, 2014). Therefore, examining factors that contribute to the well-being of mothers and, in turn, their parenting may be one of the most effective ways of contributing to children’s adjustment. This makes the kids more flexible to unpredictable turns of life. Mothers teach their children survival skills and how to adapt to change. People who experience not having a father have built resilience. Mothers raise their children to be independent.
In today’s society, we have this picture-perfect image of a big happy family with both parents. For most people fathers are needed to prevent kids from going down the wrong path. According to Jerrod Brown, “Family structure and the lack of paternal involvement are predictive of juvenile delinquency. The more opportunities a child has to interact with his or her biological father, the less likely he or she is to commit a crime or have contact with the juvenile justice system”. On the other hand, fathers can put children at risk. Denna Babul and Karin Luise write: “Many abused children cling to the hope that growing up will bring escape and freedom. She is still a prisoner of her childhood: attempting to create a new life, she reencounters the trauma”. This indicates Children can go through sexual and emotional abuse that long-term damage. This long-time term damage could mental illness. “Early life adversity is a major risk factor for the development of psychological and behavioral problems later in life, depression, suicidality, anxiety disorders, post-traumatic stress disorder, and aggressive behavior” (‘How Childhood Trauma Changes Our Mental Health into Adulthood’). Fatherless children might experience a lot of self-esteem problems. The children feel like nobody cares about them because, if their dad didn’t want them, then who does? The mother helps the kids feel loved and cared for.
Living in a single-parent household can make a child appreciate work and being responsible. This dedication will rub off on their children and help the kids. Because they have greater responsibilities at home, teenage children from single-parent families often exhibit more confidence and autonomy. Having had to care for themselves, and sometimes younger siblings, teenagers from single-parent homes have built confidence in their abilities. Additionally, teens in single-parent families who have close, healthy relationships with their parents are often more capable of taking on the ‘real world’ when they reach adulthood. Greater chances for exposure to ‘adult’ tasks like balancing the checkbook, paying bills, and planning meals often give children in single-parent families an advantage when first out on their own – they know what they must do, and in what manner (‘Pros and Cons in Single-Parent Families’). In addition, children of single mothers see that she works an enormous amount of hours to make sure that there’s food on the table and clothes on their backs.
Summing up, a single mother can raise a successful child. Children having both parents also comes with advantages. Not everyone has the opportunity to have their father in their lives. That does not mean that the children are automatically destined for failure. The children not are doomed just because they don’t have a father figure. Any small experience can change a child’s outlook on life. Mothers can teach their children how to build resilience, and how it makes children appreciate.
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