The Need to Change: Self Modification

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There are more than 6 billion people all over the world, and each of them has its own and unique character. It is impossible to find two persons who have the same treats of character. That is why it is possible to say that every man in the world has a mixture of different peculiarities of the character, which can distinguish him/her from the rest of the people.

However, not all these peculiarities can be called positive, and not all of them make the life of a person easier. That is why, having realized the problem aspect of their behavior, people try to get rid of it. With this in mind, it is possible to say that psychology as a science appeared when a person decided to change something in his mind, behavior, and make his life easier. Resting on this fact, it is possible to say that the desire and ways to alter something in a mans personality is the fundamental notion in psychology. It is no surprise that a great number of works were devoted to this issue, and different methods to change a person were created.

From these considerations, it is possible to determine a persons character as a constant set of qualities that we obtain in the process of development since our childhood and which remains peculiar for a person until his death. “The traits that shape us remain fairly stable over time, making them the closest thing we have to a crystal ball” (Marano, 2011, para. 1). Being so stable, these traits allow a person to be constant in his judgments, tastes, actions, reactions, and behave in a certain way. However, sometimes, a person suffers from his behavior or attitude towards some things.

That is why he/she tries to do something in order to change his/her certain traits of character and the behavior as a result. There are several approaches to this question. There is an opinion that a character cannot be changed but only modified. Adherers of this idea suggests the ways to decrease or increase manifestations of some quality (Wood, Wood, Boyd, Wood, & Desmarais, 2013). Another point of view says that there is a possibility to change a person and suggest some ways how to do it.

According to psychology, the behavior, which a person would like to change, is called target behavior. Modern science suggests some ways how to achieve significant alterations in the mood and behavior of a person. There are several stages in this process. They are precontemplation, contemplation — determination, and action maintenance (Lickerman, 2009). Every step is very important for a successful result. The first two stages are closely interconnected, however, a lot of time can pass between them. The difference is that on the first stage, a person does not suffer from manifestations of this behavior, only being told about their unpleasant nature.

Understanding of the need to change this trait leads a person to the second stage. In my case, it is possible to say that this period has taken a long time. I was told by my friends that impatience makes my life worse. Ignoring their remarks, I tried not to notice the problem. However, sometimes, it really worried me.

The brightest manifestations occurred while being nervous or in some very important situations. Having to wait, I just became more nervous and irritated. I lost control and became less attentive. As a result, I obtained worse results than I hoped. Having analyzed the problem, I came to the conclusion that it is very important for me to modify my behavior, trying to make manifestations of impatience weaker.

Having decided to do it, I started observations. The first thing to do was to determine the regularity of the outpourings of this behavior. The deep analysis showed that the periodicity of these manifestations was increasing. In such a manner, it was a rather threatening sign. Especially often, these displays occurred in situations connected with high responsibility or great tension. Being excited, I could not control my impatience and made the situation even worse.

Resting on these facts, it is possible to state the fact that the manifestations of impatience are connected with unusual situations in which I have to act in some other way. That is why the necessity to wait unsettles as the exited nervous system is not able to calm down. Usually, the consequences are not very good or satisfying. After a long wait, I show lower results than usual, being not able to cope with impatience. That is why the plan on how to modify this target behavior should be created.

According to the stages of modifying behavior, I understood the necessity of actions and came to the determination phase. I started preparing myself for the change and for actions that will be taken to achieve this change. The first thing to do is to understand that manifestations of impatience make me weaker. With this in mind, it will become a little easier for me to cope with them as I will realize their negative influence. Then, it is possible to replace the target behavior with another one, which will influence my results and life positively.

Due to it, one point of the plan is to take a notebook and a pen. It will help to reduce the level of anxiety while waiting, as there will be the possibility to make some notes or drawings. This action can influence the development of other skills which will be helpful in further life. Moreover, some simple actions can also be applied. It is recommended to take a deep breath or count to ten as it will help a person to remain calm and oxygenate the brain. Taking it into account, it is possible to say that the main aim of this plan is to reduce the level of anxiety while waiting, with the help of some other actions.

Having analyzed the data, it is possible to come to certain conclusions. First of all, it should be said that there are some peculiarities of our behavior which form a character. Not all of them are desirable and useful for a person. That is why there is a great number of practices which help to get rid of them. In the context of me, it is possible to say that impatience is a target behavior that should be modified.

It is possible to achieve positive shifts with the help of some steps, the main aim of which is to replace this behavior with some positive habit, which will not have such a pernicious effect on my personality and life. Taking into account the stages of changing behavior, it is possible to say that it will be a complex process. That is why the plan consisting of several stages should be created and applied.

Reference List

Lickerman, A. (2009). 5 Steps To Changing Any Behavior. Psychology Today. Web.

Marano, K. (2011). Six Clues to Character. Psychology Today. Web.

Wood, S., Wood, E., Boyd, D., Wood, E., & Desmarais,S. (2013). The World of Psychology. Toronto, Canada: Pearson Education Canada.

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The Need to Change: Self Modification

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